Chapter XII
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The load was tied on. Ivan jumped down and
took the quiet, sleek horse by the bridle. The young wife flung the
rake up on the load, and with a bold step, swinging her arms, she
went to join the women, who were forming a ring for the haymakers’
dance. Ivan drove off to the road and fell into line with the other
loaded carts. The peasant women, with their rakes on their
shoulders, gay with bright flowers, and chattering with ringing,
merry voices, walked behind the hay-cart. One wild untrained female
voice broke into a song, and sang it alone through a verse, and
then the same verse was taken up and repeated by half a hundred
strong healthy voices, of all sorts, coarse and fine, singing in
unison.
The women, all singing, began to come close to
Levin, and he felt as though a storm were swooping down upon him
with a thunder of merriment. The storm swooped down, enveloped him
and the haycock on which he was lying, and the other haycocks, and
the wagon-loads, and the whole meadow and distant fields all seemed
to be shaking and singing to the measures of this wild merry song
with its shouts and whistles and clapping. Levin felt envious of
this health and mirthfulness; he longed to take part in the
expression of this joy of life. But he could do nothing, and had to
lie and look on and listen. When the peasants, with their singing,
had vanished out of sight and hearing, a weary feeling of
despondency at his own isolation, his physical inactivity, his
alienation from this world, came over Levin.
Some of the very peasants who had been most active
in wrangling with him over the hay, some whom he had treated with
contumely, and who had tried to cheat him, those very peasants had
greeted him good-humoredly, and evidently had not, were incapable
of having any feeling of rancor against him, any regret, any
recollection even of having tried to deceive him. All that was
drowned in a sea of merry common labor. God gave the day, God gave
the strength. And the day and the strength were consecrated to
labor, and that labor was its own reward. For whom the labor? What
would be its fruits? These were idle considerations—beside the
point.
Often Levin had admired this life, often he had a
sense of envy of the men who led this life; but to-day for the
first time, especially under the influence of what he had seen in
the attitude of Ivan Parmenov to his young wife, the idea presented
itself definitely to his mind that it was in his power to exchange
the dreary, artificial, idle, and individualistic life he was
leading for this laborious, pure, and socially delightful
life.
The old man who had been sitting beside him had
long ago gone home; the people had all separated. Those who lived
near had gone home, while those who came from far were gathered
into a group for supper, and to spend the night in the meadow.
Levin, unobserved by the peasants, still lay on the haycock, and
still looked on and listened and mused. The peasants who remained
for the night in the meadow scarcely slept all the short summer
night. At first there was the sound of merry talk and laughing all
together over the supper, then singing again and laughter.
All the long day of toil had left no trace in them
but lightness of heart. Before the early dawn all was hushed.
Nothing was to be heard but the night sounds of the frogs that
never ceased in the marsh, and the horses snorting in the mist that
rose over the meadow before the morning. Rousing himself, Levin got
up from the haycock, and looking at the stars, he saw that the
night was over.
“Well, what am I going to do? How am I to set about
it?” he said to himself, trying to express to himself all the
thoughts and feelings he had passed through in that brief night.
All the thoughts and feelings he had passed through fell into three
separate trains of thought. One was the renunciation of his old
life, of his utterly useless education. This renunciation gave him
satisfaction, and was easy and simple. Another series of thoughts
and mental images related to the life he longed to live now. The
simplicity, the purity, the sanity of this life he felt clearly,
and he was convinced he would find in it the content, the peace,
and the dignity, of the lack of which he was so miserably
conscious. But a third series of ideas turned upon the question how
to effect this transition from the old life to the new. And there
nothing took clear shape for him. “Have a wife? Have work and the
necessity of work? Leave Pokrovskoe? Buy land? Become a member of a
peasant community? Marry a peasant girl? How am I to set about it?”
he asked himself again, and could not find an answer. “I haven’t
slept all night, though, and I can’t think it out clearly,” he said
to himself. “I’ll work it out later. One thing’s certain, this
night has decided my fate. All my old dreams of home-life were
absurd, not the real thing,” he told himself. “It’s all ever so
much simpler and better....”
“How beautiful!” he thought, looking at the
strange, as it were, mother-of-pearl shell of white fleecy
cloudlets resting right over his head in the middle of the sky.
“How exquisite it all is in this exquisite night! And when was
there time for that cloud-shell to form? Just now I looked at the
sky, and there was nothing in it—only two white streaks. Yes, and
so imperceptibly too my views of life changed!”
He went out of the meadow and walked along the
highroad towards the village. A slight wind arose, and the sky
looked gray and sullen. The gloomy moment had come that usually
precedes the dawn, the full triumph of light over darkness.
Shrinking from the cold, Levin walked rapidly,
looking at the ground. “What’s that? Some one coming,” he thought,
catching the tinkle of bells, and lifting his head. Forty paces
from him a carriage with four horses harnessed abreast was driving
towards him along the grassy high-road on which he was walking. The
shaft-horses were tilted against the shafts by the ruts, but the
dexterous driver sitting on the box held the shaft over the ruts,
so that the wheels ran on the smooth part of the road.
This was all Levin noticed, and without wondering
who it could be, he gazed absently at the coach.
In the coach was an old lady dozing in one corner,
and at the window, evidently only just awake, sat a young girl
holding in both hands the ribbons of a white cap. With a face full
of light and thought, full of a subtle, complex inner life, that
was remote from Levin, she was gazing beyond him at the glow of the
sunrise.
At the very instant when this apparition was
vanishing, the truthful eyes glanced at him. She recognized him,
and her face lighted up with wondering delight.
He could not be mistaken. There were no other eyes
like those in the world. There was only one creature in the world
that could concentrate for him all the brightness and meaning of
life. It was she. It was Kitty. He understood that she was driving
to Ergushovo from the railway station. And everything that had been
stirring Levin during that sleepless night, all the resolutions he
had made, all vanished at once. He recalled with horror his dreams
of marrying a peasant girl. There only, in the carriage that had
crossed over to the other side of the road, and was rapidly
disappearing, there only could he find the solution of the riddle
of his life, which had weighed so agonizingly upon him of
late.
She did not look out again. The sound of the
carriage-springs was no longer audible, the bells could scarcely be
heard. The barking of dogs showed the carriage had reached the
village, and all that was left was the empty fields all round, the
village in front, and he himself isolated and apart from it all,
wandering lonely along the deserted highroad.
He glanced at the sky, expecting to find there the
cloud-shell he had been admiring and taking as the symbol of the
ideas and feelings of that night. There was nothing in the sky in
the least like a shell. There, in the remote heights above, a
mysterious change had been accomplished. There was no trace of
shell, and there was stretched over fully half the sky an even
cover of tiny and ever tinier cloudlets. The sky had grown blue and
bright; and with the same softness, but with the same remoteness,
it met his questioning gaze.
“No,” he said to himself, “however good that life
of simplicity and toil may be, I cannot go back to it. I love
her.”