Chapter XIV
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When Kitty had gone and Levin was left
alone, he felt such uneasiness without her and such an impatient
longing to get as quickly, as quickly as possible, to to-morrow
morning, when he would see her again and be plighted to her
forever, that he felt afraid, as though of death, of those fourteen
hours that he had to get through without her. It was essential for
him to be with some one to talk to, so as not to be left alone, to
kill time. Stepan Arkadyevitch would have been the companion most
congenial to him, but he was going out, he said, to a soiree, in
reality to the ballet. Levin only had time to tell him he was
happy, and that he loved him, and would never, never forget what he
had done for him. The eyes and the smile of Stepan Arkadyevitch
showed Levin that he comprehended that feeling fittingly.
“Oh, so it’s not time to die yet?” said Stepan
Arkadyevitch, pressing Levin’s hand with emotion.
“N-n-no!” said Levin.
Darya Alexandrovna too, as she said good-bye to
him, gave him a sort of congratulation, saying, “How glad I am you
have met Kitty again! One must value old friends.” Levin did not
like these words of Darya Alexandrovna’s. She could not understand
how lofty and beyond her it all was, and she ought not to have
dared to allude to it. Levin said good-bye to them, but, not to be
left alone, he attached himself to his brother.
“Where are you going?”
“I’m going to a meeting.”
“Well, I’ll come with you. May I?”
“What for? Yes, come along,” said Sergey
Ivanovitch, smiling. “What is the matter with you to-day?”
“With me? Happiness is the matter with me!” said
Levin, letting down the window of the carriage they were driving
in. “You don’t mind?—it’s so stifling. It’s happiness is the matter
with me! Why is it you have never married?”
Sergey Ivanovitch smiled.
“I am very glad, she seems a nice gi...” Sergey
Ivanovitch was beginning.
“Don’t say it! don’t say it!” shouted Levin,
clutching at the collar of his fur coat with both hands, and
muffling him up in it. “She’s a nice girl” were such simple, humble
words, so out of harmony with his feeling.
Sergey Ivanovitch laughed outright a merry laugh,
which was rare with him.
“Well, anyway, I may say that I’m very glad of
it.”
“That you may do to-morrow, to-morrow and nothing
more! Nothing, nothing, silence,” said Levin, and muffling him once
more in his fur coat, he added: “I do like you so! Well, is it
possible for me to be present at the meeting?”
“Of course it is.”
“What is your discussion about to-day?” asked
Levin, never ceasing smiling.
They arrived at the meeting. Levin heard the
secretary hesitatingly read the minutes which he obviously did not
himself understand; but Levin saw from this secretary’s face what a
good, nice, kind-hearted person he was. This was evident from his
confusion and embarrassment in reading the minutes. Then the
discussion began. They were disputing about the misappropriation of
certain sums and the laying of certain pipes, and Sergey Ivanovitch
was very cutting to two members, and said something at great length
with an air of triumph; and another member, scribbling something on
a bit of paper, began timidly at first, but afterwards answered him
very viciously and delightfully. And then Sviazhsky (he was there
too) said something too, very handsomely and nobly. Levin listened
to them, and saw clearly that these missing sums and these pipes
were not anything real, and that they were not at all angry, but
were all the nicest, kindest people, and everything was as happy
and charming as possible among them. They did no harm to any one,
and were all enjoying it. What struck Levin was that he could see
through them all today, and from little, almost imperceptible signs
knew the soul of each, and saw distinctly that they were all good
at heart. And Levin himself in particular they were all extremely
fond of that day. That was evident from the way they spoke to him,
from the friendly, affectionate way even those he did not know
looked at him.
“Well, did you like it?” Sergey Ivanovitch asked
him.
“Very much. I never supposed it was so interesting!
Capital! Splendid !”
Sviazhsky went up to Levin and invited him to come
round to tea with him. Levin was utterly at a loss to comprehend or
recall what it was he had disliked in Sviazhsky, what he had failed
to find in him. He was a clever and wonderfully good-hearted
man.
“Most delighted,” he said, and asked after his wife
and sister-in-law. And from a queer association of ideas, because
in his imagination the idea of Sviazhsky’s sister-in-law was
connected with marriage, it occurred to him that there was no one
to whom he could more suitably speak of his happiness, and he was
very glad to go and see them.
Sviazhsky questioned him about his improvements on
his estate, presupposing, as he always did, that there was no
possibility of doing anything not done already in Europe, and now
this did not in the least annoy Levin. On the contrary, he felt
that Sviazhsky was right, that the whole business was of little
value, and he saw the wonderful softness and consideration with
which Sviazhsky avoided fully expressing his correct view. The
ladies of the Sviazhsky household were particularly delightful. It
seemed to Levin that they knew all about it already and sympathized
with him, saying nothing merely from delicacy. He stayed with them
one hour, two, three, talking of all sorts of subjects but the one
thing that filled his heart, and did not observe that he was boring
them dreadfully, and that it was long past their bedtime.
Sviazhsky went with him into the hall, yawning and
wondering at the strange humor his friend was in. It was past one
o’clock. Levin went back to his hotel, and was dismayed at the
thought that all alone now with his impatience he had ten hours
still left to get through. The servant, whose turn it was to be up
all night, lighted his candles, and would have gone away, but Levin
stopped him. This servant, Yegor, whom Levin had noticed before,
struck him as a very intelligent, excellent, and, above all,
good-hearted man.
“Well, Yegor, it’s hard work not sleeping, isn’t
it?”
“One’s got to put up with it! It’s part of our
work, you see. In a gentleman’s house it’s easier; but then here
one makes more.”
It appeared that Yegor had a family, three boys and
a daughter, a sempstress, whom he wanted to marry to a cashier in a
saddler’s shop.
Levin, on hearing this, informed Yegor that, in his
opinion, in marriage the great thing was love, and that with love
one would always be happy, for happiness rests only on
oneself.
Yegor listened attentively, and obviously quite
took in Levin’s idea, but by way of assent to it he enunciated,
greatly to Levin’s surprise, the observation that when he had lived
with good masters he had always been satisfied with his masters,
and now was perfectly satisfied with his employer, though he was a
Frenchman.
“Wonderfully good-hearted fellow!” thought
Levin.
“Well, but you yourself, Yegor, when you got
married, did you love your wife?”
“Ay! and why not?” responded Yegor.
And Levin saw that Yegor too was in an excited
state and intending to express all his most heartfelt
emotions.
“My life, too, has been a wonderful one. From a
child up ...” he was beginning with flashing eyes, apparently
catching Levin’s enthusiasm, just as people catch yawning.
But at that moment a ring was heard. Yegor
departed, and Levin was left alone. He had eaten scarcely anything
at dinner, had refused tea and supper at Sviazhsky‘s, but he was
incapable of thinking of supper. He had not slept the previous
night, but was incapable of thinking of sleep either. His room was
cold, but he was oppressed by heat. He opened both the movable
panes in his window and sat down to the table opposite the open
panes. Over the snow-covered roofs could be seen a decorated cross
with chains, and above it the rising triangle of Charles’s Wain
with the yellowish light of Capella. He gazed at the cross, then at
the stars, drank in the fresh freezing air that flowed evenly into
the room, and followed as though in a dream the images and memories
that rose in his imagination. At four o’clock he heard steps in the
passage and peeped out at the door. It was the gambler Myaskin,
whom he knew, coming from the club. He walked gloomily, frowning
and coughing. “Poor, unlucky fellow!” thought Levin, and tears came
into his eyes from love and pity for this man. He would have talked
with him, and tried to comfort him, but remembering that he had
nothing but his shirt on, he changed his mind and sat down again at
the open pane to bathe in the cold air and gaze at the exquisite
lines of the cross, silent, but full of meaning for him, and the
mounting lurid yellow star. At seven o’clock there was a noise of
people polishing the floors, and bells ringing in some servants’
department, and Levin felt that he was beginning to get frozen. He
closed the pane, washed, dressed, and went out into the
street.