CHAPTER VII
My First Half at Salem House
SCHOOL BEGAN IN EARNEST NEXT DAY. A
PROFOUND IMPRESSION was made upon me, I remember, by the roar of
voices in the schoolroom suddenly becoming hushed as death when Mr.
Creakle entered after breakfast, and stood in the doorway looking
round upon us, like a giant in a story-book surveying his
captives.
Tungay stood at Mr. Creakle’s elbow. He had no
occasion, I thought, to cry out “Silencel” so ferociously, for the
boys were all struck speechless and motionless.
Mr. Creakle was seen to speak, and Tungay was
heard, to this effect:
“Now boys, this is a new half. Take care what
you’re about, in this new half. Come fresh up to the lessons, I
advise you, for I come fresh up to the punishment. I won’t flinch.
It will be of no use your rubbing yourselves; you won’t rub the
marks out that I shall give you. Now get to work, every boy!”
When this dreadful exordium was over, and Tungay
had stumped out again, Mr. Creakle came to where I sat, and told me
that if I were famous for biting, he was famous for biting, too. He
then showed me the cane, and asked me what I thought of
that, for a tooth? Was it a sharp tooth, hey? Was it a
double tooth, hey? Had it a deep prong, hey? Did it bite, hey? Did
it bite? At every question he gave me a fleshy cut with it that
made me writhe; so I was very soon made free of Salem House (as
Steerforth said), and was very soon in tears also.
Not that I mean to say these were special marks of
distinction, which only I received. On the contrary, a large
majority of the boys (especially the smaller ones) were visited
with similar instances of notice, as Mr. Creakle made the round of
the schoolroom. Half the establishment was writhing and crying
before the day’s work began, and how much of it had writhed and
cried before the day’s work was over, I am really afraid to
recollect, lest I should seem to exaggerate.
I should think there never can have been a man who
enjoyed his profession more than Mr. Creakle did. He had a delight
in cutting at the boys, which was like the satisfaction of a
craving appetite. I am confident that he couldn’t resist a chubby
boy, especially, that there was a fascination in such a subject,
which made him restless in his mind, until he had scored and marked
him for the day. I was chubby myself, and ought to know. I am sure,
when I think of the fellow now, my blood rises against him with the
disinterested indignation I should feel if I could have known all
about him without having ever been in his power, but it rises
hotly, because I know him to have been an incapable brute, who had
no more right to be possessed of the great trust he held, than to
be Lord High Admiral, or Commander-in-chief—in either of which
capacities, it is probable, that he would have done infinitely less
mischief.
Miserable little propitiators of a remorseless
Idol, how abject we were to him! What a launch in life I think it
now, on looking back, to be so mean and servile to a man of such
parts and pretensions!
Here I sit at the desk again, watching his
eye—humbly watching his eye—as he rules a ciphering-book for
another victim whose hands have just been flattened by that
identical ruler, and who is trying to wipe the sting out with a
pocket-handkerchief. I have plenty to do. I don’t watch his eye in
idleness, but because I am morbidly attracted to it, in a dread
desire to know what he will do next, and whether it will be my turn
to suffer, or somebody else’s. A lane of small boys beyond me, with
the same interest in his eye, watch it too. I think he knows it,
though he pretends he don’t. He makes dreadful mouths as he rules
the ciphering-book, and now he throws his eyes sideways down our
lane, and we all droop over our books and tremble. A moment
afterwards we are again eyeing him. An unhappy culprit, found
guilty of imperfect exercise, approaches at his command. The
culprit falters excuses, and professes a determination to do better
tomorrow. Mr. Creakle cuts a joke before he beats him, and we laugh
at it—miserable little dogs, we laugh—with our visages as white as
ashes, and our hearts sinking into our boots.
Here I sit at the desk again, on a
drowsy summer afternoon. A buzz and hum go up around me, as if the
boys were so many blue-bottles. A cloggy sensation of the lukewarm
fat of meat is upon me (we dined an hour or two ago), and my head
is as heavy as so much lead. I would give the world to go to sleep.
I sit with my eye on Mr. Creakle, blinking at him like a young owl;
when sleep overpowers me for a minute, he still looms through my
slumber, ruling those ciphering-books, until he softly comes behind
me and wakes me to plainer perception of him, with a red ridge
across my back.
Here I am in the playground, with my eye still
fascinated by him, though I can’t see him. The window, at a little
distance from which I know he is having his dinner, stands for him,
and I eye that instead. If he shows his face near it, mine assumes
an imploring and submissive expression. If he looks out through the
glass, the boldest boy (Steerforth excepted) stops in the middle of
a shout or yell, and becomes contemplative. One day, Traddles (the
most unfortunate boy in the world) breaks that window accidentally
with a ball. I shudder at this moment with the tremendous sensation
of seeing it done, and feeling that the ball has bounced on to Mr.
Creakle’s sacred head.
Poor Traddles! In a tight sky-blue suit that made
his arms and legs like German sausages, or roly-poly puddings, he
was the merriest and most miserable of all the boys. He was always
being caned—I think he was caned every day that half-year, except
one holiday Monday when he was only ruler’d on both hands—and was
always going to write to his uncle about it, and never did. After
laying his head on the desk for a little while, he would cheer up
somehow, begin to laugh again, and draw skeletons all over his
slate, before his eyes were dry. I used at first to wonder what
comfort Traddles found in drawing skeletons, and for some time
looked upon him as a sort of hermit, who reminded himself by those
symbols of mortality that caning couldn’t last for ever. But I
believe he only did it because they were easy, and didn’t want any
features.
He was very honourable, Traddles was, and held it
as a solemn duty in the boys to stand by one another. He suffered
for this on several occasions, and particularly once, when
Steerforth laughed in church, and the Beadle thought it was
Traddles, and took him out. I see him now, going away in custody,
despised by the congregation. He never said who was the real
offender, though he smarted for it next day, and was imprisoned so
many hours that he came forth with a whole churchyardful of
skeletons swarming all over his Latin Dictionary. But he had his
reward. Steerforth said there was nothing of the sneak in Traddles,
and we all felt that to be the highest praise. For my part, I could
have gone through a good deal (though I was much less brave than
Traddles, and nothing like so old) to have won such a
recompense.
To see Steerforth walk to church before us,
arm-in-arm with Miss Creakle, was one of the great sights of my
life. I didn’t think Miss Creakle equal to little Em‘ly in point of
beauty, and I didn’t love her (I didn’t dare), but I thought her a
young lady of extraordinary attractions, and in point of gentility
not to be surpassed. When Steerforth, in white trousers, carried
her parasol for her, I felt proud to know him, and believed that
she could not choose but adore him with all her heart. Mr. Sharp
and Mr. Mell were both notable personages in my eyes, but
Steerforth was to them what the sun was to two stars.
Steerforth continued his protection of me, and
proved a very useful friend, since nobody dared to annoy one whom
he honoured with his countenance. He couldn‘t—or, at all events, he
didn’t—defend me from Mr. Creakle, who was very severe with me, but
whenever I had been treated worse than usual, he always told me
that I wanted a little of his pluck, and that he wouldn’t have
stood it himself, which I felt he intended for encouragement, and
considered to be very kind of him. There was one advantage, and
only one that I know of, in Mr. Creakle’s severity. He found my
placard in his way when he came up or down behind the form on which
I sat, and wanted to make a cut at me in passing; for this reason
it was soon taken off, and I saw it no more.
An accidental circumstance cemented the intimacy
between Steerforth and me, in a manner that inspired me with great
pride and satisfaction, though it sometimes led to inconvenience.
It happened on one occasion, when he was doing me the honour of
talking to me in the playground, that I hazarded the observation
that something or somebody—I forget what now—was like something or
somebody in Peregrine Pickle. He said nothing at the time,
but when I was going to bed at night, asked me if I had got that
book.
I told him no, and explained how it was that I had
read it, and all those other books of which I have made
mention.
“And do you recollect them?” Steerforth said.
“Oh, yes,” I replied; I had a good memory, and I
believed I recollected them very well.
“Then I tell you what, young Copperfield,” said
Steerforth, “you shall tell ‘em to me. I can’t get to sleep very
early at night, and I generally wake rather early in the morning.
We’ll go over ’em one after another. We’ll make some regular
Arabian Nights of it.”
I felt extremely flattered by this arrangement, and
we commenced carrying it into execution that very evening. What
ravages I committed on my favourite authors in the course of my
interpretation of them, I am not in a condition to say, and should
be very unwilling to know, but I had a profound faith in them, and
I had, to the best of my belief, a simple earnest manner of
narrating what I did narrate, and these qualities went a long
way.
The drawback was that I was often sleepy at night,
or out of spirits and indisposed to resume the story, and then it
was rather hard work, and it must be done, for to disappoint or to
displease Steerforth was of course out of the question. In the
morning too, when I felt weary, and should have enjoyed another
hour’s repose very much, it was a tiresome thing to be roused, like
the Sultana Scheherazade, and forced into a long story before’ the
getting-up bell rang, but Steerforth was resolute, and as he
explained to me, in return, my sums and exercises, and anything in
my tasks that was too hard for me, I was no loser by the
transaction. Let me do myself justice, however. I was moved by no
interested or selfish motive, nor was I moved by fear of him. I
admired and loved him, and his approval was return enough. It was
so precious to me that I look back on these trifles, now, with an
aching heart.
Steerforth was considerate too, and showed his
consideration, in one particular instance, in an unflinching manner
that was a little tantalizing, I suspect, to poor Traddles and the
rest. Peggotty’s promised letter—what a comfortable letter it
was!—arrived before “the half” was many weeks old, and with it a
cake in a perfect nest of oranges, and two bottles of cowslip wine.
This treasure, as in duty bound, I laid at the feet of Steerforth,
and begged him to dispense.
“Now, I’ll tell you what, young Copperfield,” said
he, “the wine shall be kept to wet your whistle when you are
story-telling.
I blushed at the idea, and begged him, in my
modesty, not to think of it. But he said he had observed I was
sometimes hoarse—a little roopy was his exact expression—and it
should be, every drop, devoted to the purpose he had mentioned.
Accordingly, it was locked up in his box, and drawn off by himself
in a phial, and administered to me through a piece of quill in the
cork, when I was supposed to be in want of a restorative.
Sometimes, to make it a more sovereign specific, he was so kind as
to squeeze orange juice into it, or to stir it up with ginger, or
dissolve a peppermint drop in it, and, although I cannot assert
that the flavour was improved by these experiments, or that it was
exactly the compound one would have chosen for a stomachic, the
last thing at night and the first thing in the morning, I drank it
gratefully, and was very sensible of his attention.
We seem, to me, to have been months over
Peregrine, and months more over the other stories. The
institution never nagged for want of a story, I am certain, and the
wine lasted out almost as well as the matter. Poor Traddles—I never
think of that boy but with a strange disposition to laugh, and with
tears in my eyes—was a sort of chorus, in general, and affected to
be convulsed with mirth at the comic parts, and to be overcome with
fear when there was any passage of an alarming character in the
narrative. This rather put me out, very often. It was a great jest
of his, I recollect, to pretend that he couldn’t keep his teeth
from chattering, whenever mention was made of an Alguazil in
connection with the adventures of Gil Bias, and I remember that
when Gil Bias met the captain of the robbers in Madrid, this
unlucky joker counterfeited such an ague of terror that he was
overheard by Mr. Creakle, who was prowling about the passage, and
handsomely flogged for disorderly conduct in the bedroom.
Whatever I had within me that was romantic and
dreamy, was encouraged by so much story-telling in the dark, and in
that respect the pursuit may not have been very profitable to me.
But the being cherished as a kind of plaything in my room, and the
consciousness that this accomplishment of mine was bruited about
among the boys, and attracted a good deal of notice to me though I
was the youngest there, stimulated me to exertion. In a school
carried on by sheer cruelty, whether it is presided over by a dunce
or not, there is not likely to be much learnt. I believe our boys
were, generally, as ignorant a set as any schoolboys in existence;
they were too much troubled and knocked about to learn; they could
no more do that to advantage, than anyone can do anything to
advantage in a life of constant misfortune, torment, and worry. But
my little vanity, and Steerforth’s help, urged me on somehow, and
without saving me from much, if anything, in the way of punishment,
made me, for the time I was there, an exception to the general
body, insomuch that I did steadily pick up some crumbs of
knowledge.
In this I was much assisted by Mr. Mell, who had a
liking for me that I am grateful to remember. It always gave me
pain to observe that Steerforth treated him with systematic
disparagement, and seldom lost an occasion of wounding his
feelings, or inducing others to do so. This troubled me the more
for a long time, because I had soon told Steerforth, from whom I
could no more keep such a secret than I could keep a cake or any
other tangible possession, about the two old women Mr. Mell had
taken me to see, and I was always afraid that Steerforth would let
it out, and twit him with it.
We little thought, any one of us, I dare say, when
I ate my breakfast that first morning, and went to sleep under the
shadow of the peacock’s feathers to the sound of the flute, what
consequences would come of the introduction into those alms-houses
of my insignificant person. But the visit had its unforeseen
consequences, and of a serious sort, too, in their way.
One day when Mr. Creakle kept the house from
indisposition, which naturally diffused a lively joy through the
school, there was a good deal of noise in the course of the
morning’s work. The great relief and satisfaction experienced by
the boys n ade them difficult to manage, and though the dreaded
Tungay brought his wooden leg in twice or thrice, and took notes of
the principal offenders’ names, no great impression was made by it,
as they were pretty sure of getting into trouble tomorrow, do what
they would, and thought it wise, no doubt, to enjoy themselves
today.
It was, properly, a half-holiday, being Saturday.
But, as the noise in the playground would have disturbed Mr.
Creakle, and the weather was not favourable for going out walking,
we were ordered into school in the afternoon, and set some lighter
tasks than usual, which were made for the occasion. It was the day
of the week on which Mr. Sharp went out to get his wig curled, so
Mr. Mell, who always did the drudgery, whatever it was, kept school
by himself.
If I could associate the idea of a bull or a bear
with any one so mild as Mr. Mell, I should think of him, in
connexion with that afternoon when the uproar was at its height, as
of one of those animals, baited by a thousand dogs. I recall him
bending his aching head, supported on his bony hand, over the book
on his desk, and wretchedly endeavouring to get on with his
tiresome work, amidst an uproar that might have made the Speaker of
the House of Commons giddy. Boys started in and out of their
places, playing at puss-in-the-corner with other boys; there were
laughing boys, singing boys, talking boys, dancing boys, howling
boys; boys shuffled with their feet, boys whirled about him,
grinning, making faces, mimicking him behind his back and before
his eyes, mimicking his poverty, his boots, his coat, his mother,
everything belonging to him that they should have had consideration
for.
“Silence!” cried Mr. Mell, suddenly rising up, and
striking his desk with the book. “What does this mean? It’s
impossible to bear it. It’s maddening. How can you do it to me,
boys?”
It was my book that he struck his desk with, and as
I stood beside him, following his eye as it glanced round the room,
I saw the boys all stop, some suddenly surprised, some half-afraid,
and some sorry perhaps.
Steerforth’s place was at the bottom of the school,
at the opposite end of the long room. He was lounging with his back
against the wall, and his hands in his pockets, and looked at Mr.
Mell with his mouth shut up as if he were whistling, when Mr. Mell
looked at him.
“Silence, Mr. Steerforthl” said Mr. Mell.
“Silence yourself,” said Steerforth, turning red.
“Whom are you talking to?”
“Sit down,” said Mr. Mell.
“Sit down yourself,” said Steerforth, “and mind
your business.”
There was a titter, and some applause, but Mr. Mell
was so white that silence immediately succeeded, and one boy, who
had darted out behind him to imitate his mother again, changed his
mind, and pretended to want a pen mended.
“If you think, Steerforth,” said Mr. Mell, “that I
am not acquainted with the power you can establish over any mind
here”—he laid his hand, without considering what he did (as I
supposed), upon my head—“or that I have not observed you, within a
few minutes, urging your juniors on to every sort of outrage
against me, you are mistaken.”
“I don’t give myself the trouble of thinking at all
about you,” said Steerforth, coolly, “so I’m not mistaken, as it
happens.”
“And when you make use of your position of
favouritism here, sir,” pursued Mr. Mell, with his lip trembling
very much, “to insult a gentleman—”
“A what?—where is he?” said Steerforth.
Here somebody cried out, “Shame, J. Steerforth! Too
bad!” It was Traddles, whom Mr. Mell instantly discomfited by
bidding him to hold his tongue.
—“To insult one who is not fortunate in life, sir,
and who never gave you the least offence, and the many reasons for
not insulting whom you are old enough and wise enough to
understand,” said Mr. Mell, with his lip trembling more and more,
“you commit a mean and base action. You can sit down or stand up as
you please, sir. Copperfield, go on.”
“Young Copperfield,” said Steerforth, coming
forward up the room, “stop a bit. I tell you what, Mr. Mell, once
for all. When you take the liberty of calling me mean or base, or
anything of that sort, you are an impudent beggar. You are always a
beggar, you know, but when you do that, you are an impudent
beggar.”
I am not clear whether he was going to strike Mr.
Mell, or Mr. Mell was going to strike him, or there was any such
intention on either side. I saw a rigidity come upon the whole
school as if they had been turned into stone, and found Mr. Creakle
in the midst of us, with Tungay at his side, and Mrs. and Miss
Creakle looking in at the door as if they were frightened. Mr.
Mell, with his elbows on his desk and his face in his hands, sat,
for some moments, quite still.
“Mr. Mell,” said Mr. Creakle, shaking him by the
arm, and his whisper was so audible now, that Tungay felt it
unnecessary to repeat his words, “you have not forgotten yourself,
I hope?”
“No, sir, no,” returned the Master, showing his
face, and shaking his head, and rubbing his hands in great
agitation. “No, sir, no. I have remembered myself, I—no, Mr.
Creakle, I have not forgotten myself, I—I have remembered myself,
sir. I—I—could wish you had remembered me a little sooner, Mr.
Creakle. It—it—would have been more kind, sir, more just, sir. It
would have saved me something, sir.”
Mr. Creakle, looking hard at Mr. Mell, put his hand
on Tungay’s shoulder, and got his feet upon the form close by, and
sat upon the desk. After still looking hard at Mr. Mell from his
throne, as he shook his head, and rubbed his hands, and remained in
the same state of agitation, Mr. Creakle turned to Steerforth, and
said:
“Now, sir, as he doen’t condescend to tell me, what
is this?”
Steerforth evaded the question for a little while,
looking in scorn and anger on his opponent, and remaining silent. I
could not help thinking even in that interval, I remember, what a
noble fellow he was in appearance, and how homely and plain Mr.
Mell looked opposed to him.
“What did he mean by talking about favourites,
then?” said Steerforth, at length.
“Favourites?” repeated Mr. Creakle, with the veins
in his forehead swelling quickly. “Who talked about
favourites?”
“He did,” said Steerforth.
“And pray, what did you mean by that, sir?”
demanded Mr. Creakle, turning angrily on his assistant.
“I meant, Mr. Creakle,” he returned in a low voice,
“as I said, that no pupil had a right to avail himself of his
position of favouritism to degrade me.”
“To degrade you?” said Mr. Creakle. “My
stars! But give me leave to ask you, Mr. What‘s-your-name,” and
here Mr. Creakle folded his arms, cane and all, upon his chest, and
made such a knot of his brows that his little eyes were hardly
visible below them, “whether, when you talk about favourites, you
showed proper respect to me? To me, sir,” said Mr. Creakle, darting
his head at him suddenly, and drawing it back again, “the principal
of this establishment, and your employer.”
“It was not judicious, sir, I am willing to admit,”
said Mr. Mell. “I should not have done so, if I had been
cool.”
Here Steerforth struck in.
“Then he said I was mean, and then he said I was
base, and then I called him a beggar. If I had been cool, perhaps I
shouldn’t have called him a beggar. But I did, and I am ready to
take the consequences of it.”
Without considering, perhaps, whether there were
any consequences to be taken, I felt quite in a glow at this
gallant speech. It made an impression on the boys, too, for there
was a low stir among them, though no one spoke a word.
“I am surprised, Steerforth—although your candour
does you honour,” said Mr. Creakle, “does you honour, certainly —I
am surprised, Steerforth, I must say, that you should attach such
an epithet to any person employed and paid in Salem House,
sir.”
Steerforth gave a short laugh.
“That’s not an answer, sir,” said Mr. Creakle, “to
my remark. I expect more than that from you, Steerforth.”
If Mr. Mell looked homely, in my eyes, before the
handsome boy, it would be quite impossible to say how homely Mr.
Creakle looked.
“Let him deny it,” said Steerforth.
“Deny that he is a beggar, Steerforth?” cried Mr.
Creakle. “Why, where does he go a-begging?”
“If he is not a beggar himself, his near relation’s
one,” said Steerforth. “It’s all the same.”
He glanced at me, and Mr. Mell’s hand gently patted
me upon the shoulder. I looked up with a flush upon my face and
remorse in my heart, but Mr. Mell’s eyes were fixed on Steerforth.
He continued to pat me kindly on the shoulder, but he looked at
him.
“Since you expect me, Mr. Creakle, to justify
myself,” said Steerforth, “and to say what I mean—what I have to
say is that his mother lives on charity in an alms-house.”
Mr. Mell still looked at him, and still patted me
kindly on the shoulder, and said to himself in a whisper, if I
heard right: “Yes, I thought so.”
Mr. Creakle turned to his assistant, with a severe
frown and laboured politeness:
“Now you hear what this gentleman says, Mr. Mell.
Have the goodness, if you please, to set him right before the
assembled school.”
“He is right, sir, without correction,” returned
Mr. Mell, in the midst of a dead silence, “what he has said is
true.”
“Be so good then as declare publicly, will you,”
said Mr. Creakle, putting his head on one side, and rolling his
eyes round the school, “whether it ever came to my knowledge until
this moment?”
“I believe not directly,” he returned.
“Why, you know not,” said Mr. Creakle. “Don’t you,
man?”
“I apprehend you never supposed my worldly
circumstances to be very good,” replied the assistant. “You know
what my position is, and always has been here.”
“I apprehend, if you come to that,” said Mr.
Creakle, with his veins swelling again bigger than ever, “that
you’ve been in a wrong position altogether, and mistook this for a
charity school. Mr. Mell, we’ll part, if you please. The sooner the
better.”
“There is no time,” answered Mr. Mell, rising,
“like the present.”
“Sir, to youl” said Mr. Creakle.
“I take my leave of you, Mr. Creakle, and all of
you,” said Mr. Mell, glancing round the room, and again patting me
gently on the shoulder. “James Steerforth, the best wish I can
leave you is that you may come to be ashamed of what you have done
today. At present I would prefer to see you anything rather than a
friend, to me, or to anyone in whom I feel an interest.”
Once more he laid his hand upon my shoulder, and
then, taking his flute and a few books from his desk, and leaving
the key in it for his successor, he went out of the school, with
his property under his arm. Mr. Creakle then made a speech, through
Tungay, in which he thanked Steerforth for asserting (though
perhaps too warmly) the independence and respectability of Salem
House, and which he wound up by shaking hands with Steerforth,
while we gave three cheers—I did not quite know what for, but I
supposed for Steerforth, and so joined in them ardently, though I
felt miserable. Mr. Creakle then caned Tommy Traddles for being
discovered in tears, instead of cheers, on account of Mr. Mell’s
departure, and went back to his sofa, or his bed, or wherever he
had come from.
We were left to ourselves now, and looked very
blank, I recollect, on one another. For myself, I felt so much
self-reproach and contrition for my part in what had happened, that
nothing would have enabled me to keep back my tears but the fear
that Steerforth, who often looked at me, I saw, might think it
unfriendly—or. I should rather say, considering our relative ages,
and the feeling with which I regarded him, undutiful—if I showed
the emotion which distressed me. He was very angry with Traddles,
and said he was glad he had caught it.
Poor Traddles, who had passed the stage of lying
with his head upon the desk, and was relieving himself as usual
with a burst of skeletons, said he didn’t care. Mr. Mell was
ill-used.
“Who has ill-used him, you girl?” said
Steerforth.
“Why, you have,” returned Traddles.
“What have I done?” said Steerforth.
“What have you done?” retorted Traddles. “Hurt his
feelings and lost him his situation.”
“His feelings!” repeated Steerforth disdainfully.
“His feelings will soon get the better of it, I’ll be bound. His
feelings are not like yours, Miss Traddles. As to his
situation—which was a precious one, wasn’t it?—do you suppose I am
not going to write home, and take care that he gets some money?
Polly?”
We thought this intention very noble in Steerforth,
whose mother was a widow, and rich, and would do almost anything,
it was said, that he asked her. We were all extremely glad to see
Traddles so put down, and exalted Steerforth to the skies,
especially when he told us, as he condescended to do, that what he
had done had been done expressly for us, and for our cause, and
that he had conferred a great boon upon us by unselfishly doing
it.
But I must say that when I was going on with a
story in the dark that night, Mr. Mell’s old flute seemed more than
once to sound mournfully in my ears, and that when at last
Steerforth was tired, and I lay down in my bed, I fancied it
playing so sorrowfully somewhere, that I was quite wretched.
I soon forgot him in the contemplation of
Steerforth, who, in an easy amateur way, and without any book (he
seemed to me to know everything by heart), took some of his classes
until a new master was found. The new master came from a
grammar-school, and before he entered on his duties, dined in the
parlour one day, to be introduced to Steerforth. Steerforth
approved of him highly, and told us he was a Brick. Without exactly
understanding what learned distinction was meant by this, I
respected him greatly for it, and had no doubt whatever of his
superior knowledge, though he never took the pains with me—not that
I was anybody—that Mr. Mell had taken.
There was only one other event in this half-year,
out of the daily school life, that made an impression upon me which
still survives. It survives for many reasons.
One afternoon, when we were all harassed into a
state of dire confusion, and Mr. Creakle was laying about him
dreadfully, Tungay came in, and called out in his usual strong way:
“Visitors for Copperfield!”
A few words were interchanged between him and Mr.
Creakle, as, who the visitors were, and what room they were to be
shown into, and then I, who had, according to custom, stood up on
the announcement being made, and felt quite faint with
astonishment, was told to go by the back-stairs and get a clean
frill on, before I repaired to the dining-room. These orders I
obeyed, in such a flutter and hurry of my young spirits as I had
never known before, and when I got to the parlour-door, and the
thought came into my head that it might be my mother—I had only
thought of Mr. or Miss Murdstone until then—I drew back my hand
from the lock, and stopped to have a sob before I went in.
At first I saw nobody, but, feeling a pressure
against the door, I looked round it, and there, to my amazement,
were Mr. Peggotty and Ham, ducking at me with their hats, and
squeezing one another against the wall. I could not help laughing,
but it was much more in the pleasure of seeing them, than in the
appearance they made. We shook hands in a very cordial way, and I
laughed and laughed, until I pulled out my pocket-handkerchief and
wiped my eyes.
Mr. Peggotty (who never shut his mouth once, I
remember, during the visit) showed great concern when he saw me do
this, and nudged Ham to say something.
“Cheer up, Mas‘r Davy bor’!” said Ham, in his
simpering way. “Why, how you have growed!”
“Am I grown?” I said, drying my eyes. I was not
crying at anything particular that I know of, but somehow it made
me cry, to see old friends.
“Growed, Mas‘r Davy bor’? Ain’t he growed!” said
Ham.
“Ain’t he growed!” said Mr. Peggotty.
They made me laugh again by laughing at each other,
and then we all three laughed until I was in danger of crying
again.
“Do you know how Mama is, Mr. Peggotty?” I said.
“And how my dear, dear, old Peggotty is?”
“Oncommon,” said Mr. Peggotty.
“And little Em‘ly, and Mrs. Gummidge?”
“On—common,” said Mr. Peggotty.
There was a silence. Mr. Peggotty, to relieve it,
took two prodigious lobsters, and an enormous crab, and a large
canvas bag of shrimps, out of his pockets, and piled them up in
Ham’s arms.
“You see,” said Mr. Peggotty, “knowing as you was
partial to a little relish with your wittles when you was along
with us, we took the liberty. The old Mawther biled ‘em, she did.
Mrs. Gummidge biled ’em. Yes,” said Mr. Peggotty, slowly, who I
thought appeared to stick to the subject on account of having no
other subject ready, “Mrs. Gummidge, I do assure you, she biled
‘em.”
I expressed my thanks. Mr. Peggotty, after looking
at Ham, who stood smiling sheepishly over the shell-fish, without
making any attempt to help him, said:
“We come, you see, the wind and tide making in our
favour, in one of our Yarmouth lugs to Gravesen‘. My sister she
wrote to me the name of this here place, and wrote to me as if ever
I chanced to come to Gravesen’, I was to come over and inquire for
Mas‘r Davy, and give her dooty, humbly wishing him well, and
reporting of the fam’ly as they was oncommon to-be-sure. Little
Em‘ly, you see, she’ll write to my sister when I go back as I see
you, and as you was similarly oncommon, and so we make it quite a
merry-go-rounder.”
I was obliged to consider a little before I
understood what Mr. Peggotty meant by this figure, expressive of a
complete circle of intelligence. I then thanked him heartily, and
said, with a consciousness of reddening, that I supposed little
Em‘ly was altered too, since we used to pick up shells and pebbles
on the beach.
“She’s getting to be a woman, that’s wot she’s
getting to be,” said Mr. Peggotty. “Ask him.”
He meant Ham, who beamed with delight and assent
over the bag of shrimps.
“Her pretty face!” said Mr. Peggotty, with his own
shining like a light.
“Her learning!” said Ham.
“Her writing!” said Mr. Peggotty. “Why it’s as
black as jet! And so large it is, you might see it
anywheres.”
It was perfectly delightful to behold with what
enthusiasm Mr. Peggotty became inspired when he thought of his
little favourite. He stands before me again, his bluff hairy face
irradiating with a joyful love and pride for which I can find no
description. His honest eyes fire up, and sparkle, as if their
depths were stirred by something bright. His broad chest heaves
with pleasure. His strong loose hands clench themselves, in his
earnestness, and he emphasizes what he says with a right arm that
shows, in my pigmy view, like a sledge hammer.
Ham was quite as earnest as he. I dare say they
would have said much more about her, if they had not been abashed
by the unexpected coming in of Steerforth, who, seeing me in a
corner speaking with two strangers, stopped in a song he was
singing, and said: “I didn’t know you were here, young
Copperfield!” (for it was not the usual visiting room) and crossed
by us on his way out.
I am not sure whether it was in the pride of having
such a friend as Steerforth, or in the desire to explain to him how
I came to have such a friend as Mr. Peggotty, that I called to him
as he was going away. But I said, modestly—Good Heaven, how it all
comes back to me this long time afterwards! —
“Don’t go, Steerforth, if you please. These are two
Yarmouth boatmen—very kind, good people—who are relations of my
nurse, and have come from Gravesend to see me.”
“Aye, aye?” said Steerforth, returning. “I am glad
to see them. How are you both?”
There was an ease in his manner—a gay and light
manner it was, but not swaggering—which I still believe to have
borne a kind of enchantment with it. I still believe him, in virtue
of this carriage, his animal spirits, his delightful voice, his
handsome face and figure, and, for aught I know, of some inborn
power of attraction besides (which I think a few people possess),
to have carried a spell with him to which it was a natural weakness
to yield, and which not many persons could withstand. I could not
but see how pleased they were with him, and how they seemed to open
their hearts to him in a moment.
“You must let them know at home, if you please, Mr.
Peggotty,” I said, “when this letter is sent, that Mr. Steerforth
is very kind to me, and that I don’t know what I should ever do
here without him.”
“Nonsense!” said Steerforth, laughing. “You mustn’t
tell them anything of the sort.”
“And if Mr. Steerforth ever comes into Norfolk or
Suffolk, Mr. Peggotty,” I said, “while I am there, you may depend
upon it I shall bring him to Yarmouth, if he will let me, to see
your house. You never saw such a good house, Steerforth. It’s made
out of a boat!”
“Made out of a boat, is it?” said Steerforth. “It’s
the right sort of house for such a thorough-built boatman.”
“So ‘tis, sir, so ’tis, sir,” said Ham, grinning.
“You’re right, young gen‘l’m’n. Mas‘r Davy, bor’, gen‘l’m‘n’s
right. A thorough-built boatman! Hor, hor! That’s what he is,
too!”
Mr. Peggotty was no less pleased than his nephew,
though his modesty forbade him to claim a personal compliment so
vociferously.
“Well, sir,” he said, bowing and chuckling, and
tucking in the ends of his neckerchief at his breast: “I thankee,
sir, I thankee! I do my endeavours in my line of life, sir.”
“The best of men can do no more, Mr. Peggotty,”
said Steerforth. He had got his name already.
“I’ll pound it it’s wot you do yourself, sir,” said
Mr. Peggotty, shaking his head, “and wot you do well—right well! I
thankee, sir. I’m obleeged to you, sir, for your welcoming manner
of me. I’m rough, sir, but I’m ready—leastways, I hope I’m ready,
you unnerstand. My house ain’t much for to see, sir, but it’s
hearty at your service if ever you should come along with Mas‘r
Davy to see it. I’m a reg’lar Dodman, I am,” said Mr. Peggotty, by
which he meant snail, and this was in allusion to his being slow to
go, for he had attempted to go after every sentence, and had
somehow or other come back again, “but I wish you both well, and I
wish you happyl”
Ham echoed this sentiment, and we parted with them
in the heartiest manner. I was almost tempted that evening to tell
Steerforth about pretty little Em‘ly, but I was too timid of
mentioning her name, and too much afraid of his laughing at me. I
remember that I thought a good deal, and in an uneasy sort of way,
about Mr. Peggotty having said that she was getting on to be a
woman, but I decided that was nonsense.
We transported the shell-fish, or the “relish” as
Mr. Peggotty had modestly called it, up into our room unobserved,
and made a great supper that evening. But Traddles couldn’t get
happily out of it. He was too unfortunate even to come through a
supper like anybody else. He was taken ill in the night—quite
prostrate he was—in consequence of Crab, and after being drugged
with black draughts and blue pills, to an extent which Demple
(whose father was a doctor) said was enough to undermine a horse’s
constitution, received a caning and six chapters of Greek Testament
for refusing to confess.
The rest of the half-year is a jumble in my
recollection of the daily strife and struggle of our lives, of the
waning summer and the changing season, of the frosty mornings when
we were rung out of bed, and the cold, cold smell of the dark
nights when we were run into bed, of the evening schoolroom dimly
lighted and indifferently warmed, and the morning schoolroom which
was nothing but a great shivering-machine, of the alternation of
boiled beef with roast beef, and boiled mutton with roast mutton,
of clods of bread-and-butter, dog‘s-eared lesson-books, cracked
slates, tear-blotted copy-books, canings, rulerings, hair-cuttings,
rainy Sundays, suet puddings, and a dirty atmosphere of ink
surrounding all.
I well remember, though, how the distant idea of
the holidays, after seeming for an immense time to be a stationary
speck, began to come towards us, and to grow and grow. How, from
counting months, we came to weeks, and then to days, and how I then
began to be afraid that I should not be sent for, and when I learnt
from Steerforth that I had been sent for and was certainly
to go home, had dim forebodings that I might break my leg first.
How the breaking-up day changed its place fast, at last, from the
week after next to next week, this week, the day after tomorrow,
tomorrow, when I was inside the Yarmouth mail, and going
home.
I had many a broken sleep inside the Yarmouth mail,
and many an incoherent dream of all these things. But when I awoke
at intervals, the ground outside the window was not the playground
of Salem House, and the sound in my ears was not the sound of Mr.
Creakle giving it to Traddles, but was the sound of the coachman
touching up the horses.