LAW 34
BE ROYAL IN YOUR OWN FASHION: ACT LIKE A KING TO
BE TREATED LIKE ONE
JUDGMENT
The way you carry yourself will often determine
how you are treated: In the long run, appearing vulgar or common
will make people disrespect you. For a king respects himself and
inspires the same sentiment in others. By acting regally and
confident of your powers, you make yourself seem destined to wear a
crown.
TRANSGRESSION OF THE LAW
In July of 1830, a revolution broke out in Paris
that forced the king, Charles X, to abdicate. A commission of the
highest authorities in the land gathered to choose a successor, and
the man they picked was Louis-Philippe, the Duke of Orléans.
From the beginning it was clear that Louis-Philippe
would be a different kind of king, and not just because he came
from a different branch of the royal family, or because he had not
inherited the crown but had been given it, by a commission, putting
his legitimacy in question. Rather it was that he disliked ceremony
and the trappings of royalty; he had more friends among the bankers
than among the nobility; and his style was not to create a new kind
of royal rule, as Napoleon had done, but to downplay his status,
the better to mix with the businessmen and middle-class folk who
had called him to lead. Thus the symbols that came to be associated
with Louis-Philippe were neither the scepter nor the crown, but the
gray hat and umbrella with which he would proudly walk the streets
of Paris, as if he were a bourgeois out for a stroll. When
Louis-Philippe invited James Rothschild, the most important banker
in France, to his palace, he treated him as an equal. And unlike
any king before him, not only did he talk business with Monsieur
Rothschild but that was literally all he talked, for he loved money
and had amassed a huge fortune.
As the reign of the “bourgeois king” plodded on,
people came to despise him. The aristocracy could not endure the
sight of an unkingly king, and within a few years they turned on
him. Meanwhile the growing class of the poor, including the
radicals who had chased out Charles X, found no satisfaction in a
ruler who neither acted as a king nor governed as a man of the
people. The bankers to whom Louis-Philippe was the most beholden
soon realized that it was they who controlled the country, not he,
and they treated him with growing contempt. One day, at the start
of a train trip organized for the royal family, James Rothschild
actually berated him—and in public—for being late. Once the king
had made news by treating the banker as an equal; now the banker
treated the king as an inferior.
Eventually the workers’ insurrections that had
brought down Louis-Philippe’s predecessor began to reemerge, and
the king put them down with force. But what was he defending so
brutally? Not the institution of the monarchy, which he disdained,
nor a democratic republic, which his rule prevented. What he was
really defending, it seemed, was his own fortune, and the fortunes
of the bankers—not a way to inspire loyalty among the
citizenry.
Never lose your self-respect, nor be too
familiar with yoetrself when you are alone. Let your integrity
itself be your own standard of rectitude, and be more indebted to
the severity of your own judgment of yourself than to all external
precepts. Desist from unseemly conduct, rather out of respect for
your own virtue than for the strictures of external authority. Come
to hold yourself in awe, and you will have no need of Seneca’s
imaginary tittor.
BALIASAR GRACIAN. 1601-1658
In early 1848, Frenchmen of all classes began to
demonstrate for electoral reforms that would make the country truly
democratic. By February the demonstrations had turned violent. To
assuage the populace, Louis-Philippe fired his prime minister and
appointed a liberal as a replacement. But this created the opposite
of the desired effect: The people sensed they could push the king
around. The demonstrations turned into a full-fledged revolution,
with gunfire and barricades in the streets.
On the night of February 23, a crowd of Parisians
surrounded the palace. With a suddenness that caught everyone by
surprise, Louis-Philippe abdicated that very evening and fled to
England. He left no successor, nor even the suggestion of one—his
whole government folded up and dissolved like a traveling circus
leaving town.
Interpretation
Louis-Philippe consciously dissolved the aura that
naturally pertains to kings and leaders. Scoffing at the symbolism
of grandeur, he believed a new world was dawning, where rulers
should act and be like ordinary citizens. He was right: A new
world, without kings and queens, was certainly on its way. He was
profoundly wrong, however, in predicting a change in the dynamics
of power.
The bourgeois king’s hat and umbrella amused the
French at first, but soon grew irritating. People knew that
Louis-Philippe was not really like them at all—that the hat and
umbrella were essentially a kind of trick to encourage them in the
fantasy that the country had suddenly grown more equal. Actually,
though, the divisions of wealth had never been greater. The French
expected their ruler to be a bit of a showman, to have some
presence. Even a radical like Robespierre, who had briefly come to
power during the French Revolution fifty years earlier, had
understood this, and certainly Napoleon, who had turned the
revolutionary republic into an imperial regime, had known it in his
bones. Indeed as soon as Louis-Philippe fled the stage, the French
revealed their true desire: They elected Napoleon’s grand-nephew
president. He was a virtual unknown, but they hoped he would
re-create the great general’s powerful aura, erasing the awkward
memory of the “bourgeois king.”
Powerful people may be tempted to affect a
common-man aura, trying to create the illusion that they and their
subjects or underlings are basically the same. But the people whom
this false gesture is intended to impress will quickly see through
it. They understand that they are not being given more power—that
it only appears as if they shared in the powerful person’s
fate. The only kind of common touch that works is the kind affected
by Franklin Roosevelt, a style that said the president shared
values and goals with the common people even while he remained a
patrician at heart. He never pretended to erase his distance from
the crowd.
Leaders who try to dissolve that distance through a
false chumminess gradually lose the ability to inspire loyalty,
fear, or love. Instead they elicit contempt. Like Louis-Philippe,
they are too uninspiring even to be worth the guillotine—the best
they can do is simply vanish in the night, as if they were never
there.
OBSERVANCE OF THE LAW
When Christopher Columbus was trying to find
funding for his legendary voyages, many around him believed he came
from the Italian aristocracy. This view was passed into history
through a biography written after the explorer’s death by his son,
which describes him as a descendant of a Count Colombo of the
Castle of Cuccaro in Montferrat. Colombo in turn was said to be
descended from the legendary Roman general Colonius, and two of his
first cousins were supposedly direct descendants of an emperor of
Con stantinople. An illustrious background indeed. But it was
nothing more than illustrious fantasy, for Columbus was actually
the son of Domenico Colombo, a humble weaver who had opened a wine
shop when Christopher was a young man, and who then made his living
by selling cheese.
Columbus himself had created the myth of his noble
background, because from early on he felt that destiny had singled
him out for great things, and that he had a kind of royalty in his
blood. Accordingly he acted as if he were indeed descended from
noble stock. After an uneventful career as a merchant on a
commercial vessel, Columbus, originally from Genoa, settled in
Lisbon. Using the fabricated story of his noble background, he
married into an established Lisbon family that had excellent
connections with Portuguese royalty.
Through his in-laws, Columbus finagled a meeting
with the king of Portugal, Joao II, whom he petitioned to finance a
westward voyage aimed at discovering a shorter route to Asia. In
return for announcing that any discoveries he achieved would be
made in the king’s name, Columbus wanted a series of rights: the
title Grand Admiral of the Oceanic Sea; the office of viceroy over
any lands he found; and 10 percent of the future commerce with such
lands. All of these rights were to be hereditary and for all time.
Columbus made these demands even though he had previously been a
mere merchant, he knew almost nothing about navigation, he could
not work a quadrant, and he had never led a group of men. In short
he had absolutely no qualifications for the journey he proposed.
Furthermore, his petition included no details as to how he would
accomplish his plans, just vague promises.
When Columbus finished his pitch, João II smiled:
He politely declined the offer, but left the door open for the
future. Here Columbus must have noticed something he would never
forget: Even as the king turned down the sailor’s demands, he
treated them as legitimate. He neither laughed at Columbus nor
questioned his background and credentials. In fact the king was
impressed by the boldness of Columbus’s requests, and clearly felt
comfortable in the company of a man who acted so confidently. The
meeting must have convinced Columbus that his instincts were
correct: By asking for the moon, he had instantly raised his own
status, for the king assumed that unless a man who set such a high
price on himself were mad, which Columbus did not appear to be, he
must somehow be worth it.
HIPPOFIDES IT SI
In the next generation the family became much
more famous than before through the distinction conferred upon it
by Cleisthenes the master of Sicyon. Cleisthenes... had a daughter,
Agarista, whom he wished to marry to the best man in all Greece. So
during the Olympic games, in which he had himself won the chariot
race, he had a public announcement made, to the effect that any
Greek who thought himself good enough to become Cleisthenes’
son-in-law should present himself in Sicyon within sixty
days—or sooner if he wished—because he
intended, within the year following the sixtieth day, to betroth
his daughter to her future husband. Cleisthenes had had a
race-track and a wrestling-ring specially made for his purpose, and
presently the suitors began to arrive—every man of Greek
nationality who had something to be proud of either in his country
or in himself.... Cleisthenes began by asking each [of the numerous
suitors] in turn to name his country and parentage; then he kept
them in his house for a year, to get to know them well, entering
into conversation with them sometimes singly, sometimes all
together, and testing each of them for his manly qualities
and temper, education and manners.... But the most important test
of all was their behaviour at the dinner-table. All this went on
throughout their stay in Sicyon, and all the time he entertained
them handsomely. For one reason or another it was the two Athenians
who impressed Cleisthenes most favourably, and of the two
Tisander’s son Hippocleides came to be preferred.... At last the
day came which had been fixed for the betrothal, and Cleisthenes
had to declare his choice. He nzarked the day by the sacrifice of a
hundred oxen, and then gave a great banquet, to which not only the
suitors but everyone of note in Sicyon was invited. When dinner was
over, the suitors began to compete with each other in music and in
talking in company. In both these accomplishments it was
Hippocleides who proved by far the doughtiest champion, until at
last, as more and more wine was drunk, he asked the flute-player to
play him a tune and began to dance to it. Now it may well be that
he danced to his own satisfaction; Cleisthenes, however, who was
watching the performance, began to have serious doubts about the
whole business. Presently, after a brief pause, Hippocleides sent
for a table; the table was brought, and Hippocleides,
climbing on to it, danced first some Laconian dances, next some
Attic ones, and ended by standing on his head and beating time with
his legs in the air The Laconian and Attic dances were bad enough;
but Cleisthenes, though he already loathed the thought of having a
son-in-law like that, nevertheless restrained himself and managed
to avoid an outburst; but when he saw Hippocleides beating time
with his legs, he could bear it no longer. “Son of Tisander, ”he
cried, “you have danced away your marriage. ”
THE HISTORIES, Herodotus, FIFTH CENTURY B.C.
A few years later Columbus moved to Spain. Using
his Portuguese connections, he moved in elevated circles at the
Spanish court, receiving subsidies from illustrious financiers and
sharing tables with dukes and princes. To all these men he repeated
his request for financing for a voyage to the west—and also for the
rights he had demanded from João II. Some, such as the powerful
duke of Medina, wanted to help, but could not, since they lacked
the power to grant him the titles and rights he wanted. But
Columbus would not back down. He soon realized that only one person
could meet his demands: Queen Isabella. In 1487 he finally managed
a meeting with the queen, and although he could not convince her to
finance the voyage, he completely charmed her, and became a
frequent guest in the palace.
In 1492 the Spanish finally expelled the Moorish
invaders who centuries earlier had seized parts of the country.
With the wartime burden on her treasury lifted, Isabella felt she
could finally respond to the demands of her explorer friend, and
she decided to pay for three ships, equipment, the salaries of the
crews, and a modest stipend for Columbus. More important, she had a
contract drawn up that granted Columbus the titles and rights on
which he had insisted. The only one she denied—and only in the
contract’s fine print—was the 10 percent of all revenues from any
lands discovered: an absurd demand, since he wanted no time limit
on it. (Had the clause been left in, it would eventually have made
Columbus and his heirs the wealthiest family on the planet.
Columbus never read the fine print.)
Satisfied that his demands had been met, Columbus
set sail that same year in search of the passage to Asia. (Before
he left he was careful to hire the best navigator he could find to
help him get there.) The mission failed to find such a passage, yet
when Columbus petitioned the queen to finance an even more
ambitious voyage the following year, she agreed. By then she had
come to see Columbus as destined for great things.
Interpretation
As an explorer Columbus was mediocre at best. He
knew less about the sea than did the average sailor on his ships,
could never determine the latitude and longitude of his
discoveries, mistook islands for vast continents, and treated his
crew badly. But in one area he was a genius: He knew how to sell
himsel£ How else to explain how the son of a cheese vendor, a
low-level sea merchant, managed to ingratiate himself with the
highest royal and aristocratic families?
Columbus had an amazing power to charm the
nobility, and it all came from the way he carried himself. He
projected a sense of confidence that was completely out of
proportion to his means. Nor was his confidence the aggressive,
ugly self-promotion of an upstart—it was a quiet and calm
self-assurance. In fact it was the same confidence usually shown by
the nobility themselves. The powerful in the old-style
aristocracies felt no need to prove or assert themselves; being
noble, they knew they always deserved more, and asked for it. With
Columbus, then, they felt an instant affinity, for he carried
himself just the way they did—elevated above the crowd, destined
for greatness.
Understand: It is within your power to set your own
price. How you carry yourself reflects what you think of yourself.
If you ask for little, shuffle your feet and lower your head,
people will assume this reflects your character. But this behavior
is not you—it is only how you have chosen to present yourself to
other people. You can just as easily present the Columbus front:
buoyancy, confidence, and the feeling that you were born to wear a
crown.
With all great deceivers there is a noteworthy
occurrence to which they owe their power. In the actual act of
deception they are overcome by belief in themselves: it is this
which then speaks so miraculously and compellingly to those around
them.
Friedrich Nietzsche, 1844-1900
KEYS TO POWER
As children, we start our lives with great
exuberance, expecting and demanding everything from the world. This
generally carries over into our first forays into society, as we
begin our careers. But as we grow older the rebuffs and failures we
experience set up boundaries that only get firmer with time. Coming
to expect less from the world, we accept limitations that are
really self-imposed. We start to bow and scrape and apologize for
even the simplest of requests. The solution to such a shrinking of
horizons is to deliberately force ourselves in the opposite
direction—to downplay the failures and ignore the limitations, to
make ourselves demand and expect as much as the child. To
accomplish this, we must use a particular strategy upon ourselves.
Call it the Strategy of the Crown.
The Strategy of the Crown is based on a simple
chain of cause and effect: If we believe we are destined for great
things, our belief will radiate outward, just as a crown creates an
aura around a king. This outward radiance will infect the people
around us, who will think we must have reasons to feel so
confident. People who wear crowns seem to feel no inner sense of
the limits to what they can ask for or what they can accomplish.
This too radiates outward. Limits and boundaries disappear. Use the
Strategy of the Crown and you will be surprised how often it bears
fruit. Take as an example those happy children who ask for whatever
they want, and get it. Their high expectations are their charm.
Adults enjoy granting their wishes—just as Isabella enjoyed
granting the wishes of Columbus.
Throughout history, people of undistinguished
birth—the Theodoras of Byzantium, the Columbuses, the Beethovens,
the Disraelis—have managed to work the Strategy of the Crown,
believing so firmly in their own greatness that it becomes a
self-fulfilling prophecy. The trick is simple: Be overcome by your
self-belief. Even while you know you are practicing a kind of
deception on yourself, act like a king. You are likely to be
treated as one.
The crown may separate you from other people, but
it is up to you to make that separation real: You have to act
differently, demonstrating your distance from those around you. One
way to emphasize your difference is to always act with dignity, no
matter the circumstance. Louis-Philippe gave no sense of being
different from other people—he was the banker king. And the moment
his subjects threatened him, he caved in. Everyone sensed this and
pounced. Lacking regal dignity and firmness of purpose,
Louis-Philippe seemed an impostor, and the crown was easily toppled
from his head.
Regal bearing should not be confused with
arrogance. Arrogance may seem the king’s entitlement, but in fact
it betrays insecurity. It is the very opposite of a royal
demeanor.
Haile Selassie, ruler of Ethiopia for forty or so
years beginning in 1930, was once a young man named Lij Tafari. He
came from a noble family, but there was no real chance of him
coming to power, for he was far down the line of succession from
the king then on the throne, Menelik II. Nevertheless, from an
early age he exhibited a self-confidence and a royal bearing that
surprised everyone around him.
At the age of fourteen, Tafari went to live at the
court, where he immediately impressed Menelik and became his
favorite. Tafari’s grace under fire, his patience, and his calm
self-assurance fascinated the king. The other young nobles,
arrogant, blustery, and envious, would push this slight, bookish
teenager around. But he never got angry—that would have been a sign
of insecurity, to which he would not stoop. There were already
people around him who felt he would someday rise to the top, for he
acted as if he were already there.
Years later, in 1936, when the Italian Fascists had
taken over Ethiopia and Tafari, now called Haile Selassie, was in
exile, he addressed the League of Nations to plead his country’s
case. The Italians in the audience heckled him with vulgar abuse,
but he maintained his dignified pose, as if completely unaffected.
This elevated him while making his opponents look even uglier.
Dignity, in fact, is invariably the mask to assume under difficult
circumstances: It is as if nothing can affect you, and you have all
the time in the world to respond. This is an extremely powerful
pose.
A royal demeanor has other uses. Con artists have
long known the value of an aristocratic front; it either disarms
people and makes them less suspicious, or else it intimidates them
and puts them on the defensive—and as Count Victor Lustig knew,
once you put a sucker on the defensive he is doomed. The con man
Yellow Kid Weil, too, would often assume the trappings of a man of
wealth, along with the nonchalance that goes with them. Alluding to
some magical method of making money, he would stand aloof, like a
king, exuding confidence as if he really were fabulously rich. The
suckers would beg to be in on the con, to have a chance at the
wealth that he so clearly displayed.
Finally, to reinforce the inner psychological
tricks involved in projecting a royal demeanor, there are outward
strategies to help you create the effect. First, the Columbus
Strategy: Always make a bold demand. Set your price high and do not
waver. Second, in a dignified way, go after the highest person in
the building. This immediately puts you on the same plane as the
chief executive you are attacking. It is the David and Goliath
Strategy: By choosing a great opponent, you create the appearance
of greatness.
Third, give a gift of some sort to those above you.
This is the strategy of those who have a patron: By giving your
patron a gift, you are essentially saying that the two of you are
equal. It is the old con game of giving so that you can take. When
the Renaissance writer Pietro Aretino wanted the Duke of Mantua as
his next patron, he knew that if he was slavish and sycophantic,
the duke would think him unworthy; so he approached the duke with
gifts, in this case paintings by the writer’s good friend Titian.
Accepting the gifts created a kind of equality between duke and
writer: The duke was put at ease by the feeling that he was dealing
with a man of his own aristocratic stamp. He funded Aretino
generously. The gift strategy is subtle and brilliant because you
do not beg: You ask for help in a dignified way that implies
equality between two people, one of whom just happens to have more
money.
Remember: It is up to you to set your own price.
Ask for less and that is just what you will get. Ask for more,
however, and you send a signal that you are worth a king’s ransom.
Even those who turn you down respect you for your confidence, and
that respect will eventually pay off in ways you cannot
imagine.
Image: The Crown. Place it upon your head
and you assume a different pose—tranquil
yet radiating assurance. Never show
doubt, never lose your dignity beneath
the crown, or it will not fit. It will seem
to be destined for one more worthy. Do
not wait for a coronation; the great
est emperors crown themselves.
and you assume a different pose—tranquil
yet radiating assurance. Never show
doubt, never lose your dignity beneath
the crown, or it will not fit. It will seem
to be destined for one more worthy. Do
not wait for a coronation; the great
est emperors crown themselves.
Authority: Everyone should be royal after his own
fashion. Let all your actions, even though they are not those of a
king, be, in their own sphere, worthy of one. Be sublime in your
deeds, lofty in your thoughts; and in all your doings show that you
deserve to be a king even though you are not one in reality.
(Baltasar Gracián, 1601-1658)
REVERSAL
The idea behind the assumption of regal confidence
is to set yourself apart from other people, but if you take this
too far it will be your undoing. Never make the mistake of thinking
that you elevate yourself by humiliating people. Also, it is never
a good idea to loom too high above the crowd—you make an easy
target. And there are times when an aristocratic pose is eminently
dangerous.
Charles I, king of England during the 1640s, faced
a profound public disenchantment with the institution of monarchy.
Revolts erupted throughout the country, led by Oliver Cromwell. Had
Charles reacted to the times with insight, supporting reforms and
making a show of sacrificing some of his power, history might have
been different. Instead he reverted to an even more regal pose,
seeming outraged by the assault on his power and on the divine
institution of monarchy. His stiff kingliness offended people and
spurred on their revolts. And eventually Charles lost his head,
literally. Understand: You are radiating confidence, not arrogance
or disdain.
Finally, it is true that you can sometimes find
some power through affecting a kind of earthy vulgarity, which will
prove amusing by its extreme-ness. But to the extent that you win
this game by going beyond the limits, separating yourself from
other people by appearing even more vulgar than they are, the game
is dangerous: There will always be people more vulgar than you, and
you will easily be replaced the following season by someone younger
and worse.