Larry: You always lived in great houses. You always had swimming pools. You always had great cars. You always dressed the best.

Jenna: I don’t know about that, Dad.

Larry: To me you did. At least, as much as a $40,000 a year policeman could give you. I guess Florida was awful.

Jenna: Ugh, Florida was ghetto.

Tony: I remember going to school and it was so bad. There was a barbed-wire fence around the courtyard. All the tricycles were chained to a pole in the middle so the kids wouldn’t steal them. So the only way you could play with them was if everyone got on their tricycles in unison because they were all tied together. I was in shock. I sat back and went, “Oh my God.”

Larry: Marjorie was a police dispatcher and I was a police officer. She was in another town. So we were both gone a lot.

Jenna: We ran the frigging streets and stayed out all night. It was awesome.

Larry: You were little.

Jenna: I was four, Dad. I was this little tub of lard running behind Tony. Every night we’d be out front in that huge big grass area.

Larry: Was that when you got your head caught in the…

Jenna:… staircase? That was me. They had to cut me out. We had these cement steps outside leading to the apartments. And guess who dared me to stick my head between them?

Tony: Of course. Let me tell you. I tried everything to get you out. I even buttered your head. We were screwed.

Jenna: What happens is, when you get something stuck, it swells automatically. So he was pulling and I was yelling, “Noooooo.”

Tony: Then I tried pouring melted butter in your ear. But it was still hot, and you screamed even more.

Jenna: A fireman had to come and cut me out of the stairs. Tony was always doing things like that to me.

Larry: Do you remember when I had a shoot-out at the Alexander apartments?

Tony: Yeah.

Larry: I got the call, and it was in my district. There was a guy in our parking lot firing a gun. And we shot him right there.

Jenna: Do you remember the guy who had the apartment upstairs? I used to go up there all the time. He was a grown man, and he used to tell me that he was Charlie Daniels. He wore a cowboy hat. And I would go up to his apartment and play his guitar. He would make me a sandwich, and we would hang out and listen to the radio.

Larry: How come I didn’t know that?

Jenna: Because I knew I’d get in trouble if you knew. But I was so hungry. I’d ask him, “Can I have a mayonnaise sammich please?” I thought, “I know Charlie Daniels, man, and he makes me mayonnaise sandwiches every day.”

Larry: It could have been John Wayne Gacy.

Jenna: It could have been. But he was so super good to me. He would give me little trinkets, like statues and stuff. I would go and hide them, because Marjorie used to throw out all my shit.

Larry: The only person in the apartment you guys ever had any problems with was that boy Glen.

Tony: That sixth-grader Glen?

Jenna: Yeah, the guy who shut my head in the sliding glass door.

Larry: I think that was your first big fight.

Tony: Every day after school that kid would tackle me, get on my stomach, and punch me until my nose bled.

Larry: Tony finally came and told me. I opened the front door and I said, “You go down there and stomp his ass. And if you haven’t done that, then don’t come home, because I’m stomping your ass.”

Tony: I planned it out like a military mission. I skipped school and waited for him all day. He thought I was homesick. When he got off the school bus, he came underneath the staircase. And as soon as he passed under me, I dropped a big brick right on his head. Whack. And then I dragged him to the side of the building and just started socking him. All of the adults came out and tried to stop me, but my dad came out in his police uniform and said, “None of you people touch my kid. This other kid beats him up every day, and I’m letting him take care of the problem.”

Jenna: We actually became friends with him after that.

Larry: One of the best stories about you two was when that guy tried to touch Jenna while you all were playing leapfrog.

Tony: Yeah, Ken. He touched her pee-pee, or tried to.

Larry: So you went over to the house —without telling me anything— and knocked on the door. The father answered and you said, “Is Ken home? Can he come out?” And as soon as Ken came out, you tore him up.

Tony: And then someone tried to feel up Jenna in school. Remember, I came to beat him up while his class was still going on? I was beating him and the teacher came running over and started choking me against the wall. So I punched her out.

Jenna: It was Mrs. Bland.

Larry: How do you remember that?

Tony: And then the principal came and the librarian tackled me. I was never allowed on those school grounds again.

Jenna: It was always a constant thing of you protecting me.

Tony: Why did we have to fight so much?

Jenna: But we had fun though. We had so much fun.

Tony: It sounds horrible but it really wasn’t.

Larry: Every time we were around Jenna, we ended up punching someone.

Tony: It’s still true.