Preview Of Happy Marriage: Discover the Secrets to Having the Best Marriage Life by Amanda Franklin
Chapter 1 - What Makes a Happy Marriage?
Couples entering into marriage only wish for one thing, and that is to have a successful and happy married life. When the couples were still dating, they talk a lot about the future. It is mostly about the kids or their housing plans. However, many of them do not really think about the potential changes in their life once they start living in one roof. They may have a perfect relationship when they were still dating, but what about after they entered the sacrament of marriage. Would it still be the same? If they are not fully ready for the next stage of their relationship, then problems will start to rise.
To be fully ready in entering marriage, couples need to prepare themselves physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. If one of these areas does not receive proper attention, then the couple will be at risk of facing problems in the future. Lack of preparation is the root of most conflicts in married couples. Trust, honesty and faithfulness are the most talked about issues when it comes to marriage. Couples should know how to be truthful and understanding with each other. If not, many aspects of their personal lives will be affected: the kids, the sides of both families, etc.
Marriage is a union, not only of two people, but also of two families. There will be more people involved, so the couple should consider everything before stepping up into a higher stage of relationship. To know the things that make a marriage happy and successful, here are some steps and strategies that you can follow:
The couple must have proper communication.
Communication is the main key to a happy marriage. Both the husband and wife should know how to listen to opinions and communicate with each other. Since couples were the ones who decided to take their relationship to the next level, they should be mature enough to deal with their individual flaws and weaknesses. No one is perfect, so each one must understand and lift up the other when needed.
Couples experience many problems and one of them is the lack of financial resources. When difficulties come, they should keep their communication lines open. If there are misunderstandings, it is best to talk to each other properly. If a fight is already undergoing, they should calm themselves first before saying anything bad. No one wants to end up regretting what he or she said especially because negative words that are already said can no longer be taken back. It will already plant a seed of anger in the other person’s heart.
People have their own differences, even husbands and wives living together. Couples should know each other’s personality or anticipate each other’s thoughts to make a good communication. One must be aware of his partner’s body languages and expression, for him to know if there is a problem.
Communication is an important ingredient in marriage because everything flows from it. Lack of communication may turn small problems into bigger ones; therefore, couples should not neglect the power of communication in their relationship.
Couples should always make time for each other.
This is something that most couples forget when they enter into marriage. When they are still dating, they always find a reason to spend time with each other. However, when they start living together, they realize that they have more obligations. This causes them to work even harder than when they were still single. They spend most of their time at work, thereby reducing the time spent with their partners. If this continues, they will grow apart and eventually, the gap may become too huge that it will lead to separation or divorce.
Women are mostly demanding of their husband’s time. They want their husband to give them more attention and time because that is when they feel more loved and cared. If a wife’s husband often works overtime, then he won’t be able to do other things at home anymore. Spending time with each other does not have to be extravagant. Actually, eating dinner together at home or watching movies once or twice a week is enough. Quality time is something that married couples should not take for granted.
Couples should never lose the physical connection between them.
Do not let the relationship turn cold and distant. Even small acts of intimacy every day can make a difference in improving the health of your marriage. Hugs and kisses every morning before going to work or after arriving home are usually enough to maintain the intimacy. Establish an intimate connection. Couples should always be close and intimate to keep their relationship strong.
Lack of connection and intimacy is the usual reason why most couples turn to separation and divorce. If one is too busy doing other things, he or she should try to make up for it to avoid confusion and misunderstandings.
Couples should respect each other.
Marriage is all about partnership. If there are decisions to make, the two of them should be involved. If one has a problem, no matter how small it is, he or she should tell it to the other. This is a sign that they both trust and respect their spouse in every circumstance. They should not treat each other like their opinions are not relevant and important. Do not forget to take the other’s comments and suggestions into consideration.
If conflicts arise and negative words are said, it is appropriate to apologize right away to assure the other person that it was just a mistake. Note that petty disagreements that remain unresolved might turn into bigger conflicts so be conscious of each other’s feelings.
Couples must show appreciation and gratitude to each other.
It is a common misconception that right after marriage, gift giving is no longer necessary. Most people think that these acts are only applicable when couples are still dating. Actually, appreciation and gratitude should be shown more in marriage. Giving gifts, preparing events and surprises will make an impression that the spouse is loved and important. It can be small or big as long as the thought counts.
Even the little things are very much valued in marriage. Making a simple breakfast or doing a household chore for the husband or wife every now and then can make the other one happy. There are special occasions that allow you to give your gifts and prepare surprises. The best timing is when the other celebrates his birthday or during wedding anniversaries. Both of them should ensure that these special dates are not forgotten.
Couples should learn and grow together.
Marriage is a wonderful experience. There will be ups and downs, but the most important thing is that both of them grow and learn from the journey. They will be involved with many people and they will most likely have kids in the future. Sometimes, people will think that it is complicated and confusing, but they do not really know until they experience the real situation.
Every year, there will be changes with the couples’ personality, maturity, and many other things. It can be good or bad, but the most important thing is that they do not give up with each other. They should always remember what they had said during their wedding day, the promises and vows they told each other. Both of them should be understanding about these changes because it is the key to make them stay together for a long time.
As both the husband and wife develop maturity, they should also try to achieve personal growth. For example, a husband should be more responsible and aware of his accountabilities for the family. They should have their own hobby or job that will help them be a better part of the family.
7. Do not forget about the realities of married life
Maybe one of them will wake up one morning and ask, is this really happening? It might give them an overwhelming feeling because what they are experiencing right now is going to be for a lifetime. Those kinds of thoughts may come one day and they will be surprised by how things are progressing. There will be times when both of them need to work harder to earn each other’s favour.
Hard work and commitment are also necessary in maintaining the strength of their relationship. They should commit to stay in marriage because everything that will take place is going to happen for a lifetime. The thing is they just have to accept the reality that marriage is a lifestyle.
In marriage, there are also things that couples have to remember. Both of them should not expect that they can change their spouse, but they can influence them. The two of them should be aware of such fact. If they do not accept the fact that it would be impossible to change some of the behaviors of the other, then more conflicts and misunderstandings will most likely arise.
They should not only expect the best things to come, but also the bad situations that can test their teamwork and strength as a couple. They should always remember the flaws and weaknesses of each other to help them when they needed it. If there is a continuous bad habit, try to talk it out. It is vital to keep communication lines open.