20
Ally ate her way through her bowl of granola and contemplated the day ahead. It was the weekend, so she didn’t have to work. Lauren had some other lucky employee who got to work all the busiest shifts. She glanced at the calendar from the local Chinese takeout she’d stuck on her refrigerator. One more week before Nadia might have a job for her. One more week to decide whether she wanted to blow off her job at the diner and tell Lauren what she really thought of her or maybe keep two jobs.
Someone hammered on the back door, and Ally jumped. She put down her spoon and approached the frosted glass with caution. She unlocked the back door and stared at her employer. “What’s up, Lauren?”
Lauren swept in through the door, her nose held high, her normally tied-back blond hair around her shoulders.
Ally braced herself. “Look, if you’ve come to fight with me, I’m not interested, okay?”
Lauren took a seat at the table and drummed her fingernails against the wood. “Do you really think I’d bother to break into your house?”
Ally remained at the back door and held it open. “Lauren, this is a police matter. It’s not up to me to speculate about what happened.”
“I asked you a question.”
“And I’m not at work, and you are invading my privacy. So either shut up or leave.”
“Rob said you didn’t directly implicate me. He said that a lot of other folks did, though.”
There was a slight tremor in Lauren’s voice, which made Ally pause, shut the door, and walk around the table to see Lauren’s face. “When did Rob tell you that?”
“Don’t pretend you don’t know.”
Ally sat down. “Believe it or not, he doesn’t tell me everything. What did he do?”
Lauren’s eyes flashed. “He freaking interviewed me as if I was a potential suspect!”
“You mean he asked you some questions?”
“Not in a nice brotherly sort of way. In that overbearing, ‘this is official police business’ tone, complete with a request for an alibi and all that shit.”
Ally simply stared at Lauren. Rob had done that? She’d doubted he would ever call Lauren on anything. “I suppose he was just doing his job.” Ally realized she was echoing Rob and wanted to smile at her own hypocrisy.
“Do you really think I would do that to you?”
Ally met Lauren’s gaze full-on. “Actually, I don’t. I know you don’t like me, but I reckon if you had gotten in here, you would probably have shot me or something, not just messed up the place.”
Lauren’s face crumpled. “When you left, Ally, Rob changed. He became someone I didn’t even recognize. So I lost both of you, you see.”
Ally reached for her hand and Lauren let her. “I never meant for that to happen. I thought that if I left, Rob would get over me pretty fast.”
“But he didn’t.”
“So he says.” Ally sighed. “I understand why you are angry with me, but I can’t make it right for you, Lauren.”
“Rob told me to grow up.”
Ally hoped her surprise didn’t show on her face.
“He said that you had dealt with a whole load of shit in your life and had moved on, so why couldn’t I?”
“Rob has a terrible habit of telling everyone how to get on with their lives. You don’t have to believe him or do what he says.”
“But he made me think. He’s never talked to me like that before in my life. He’s always tried to protect me, and maybe it’s time he stopped.” Lauren squeezed Ally’s hand and then got to her feet. “I’ve got to go. I just wanted to make sure you knew it wasn’t me doing all this stuff to you.”
“It’s okay. I never thought you’d smash the window of your own diner.”
Lauren looked startled. “Rob thinks that was about you too? Well, if you find out who it was, let me know so I can stick them with the bill.”
Ally swallowed down a laugh as Lauren headed out the back door, her nose still in the air. Well, they hadn’t exactly ended up the best of friends, but it still felt as if a bubble had been popped and that Lauren’s hostility would lessen as time went on. Ally went back to her granola. She still couldn’t believe that Rob had found the nerve to interrogate his own sister. It really did seem as if he could separate his emotions out from his job after all. . . .
Apart from when it came to her, of course. Ally groaned and chewed on her cereal and her thoughts. Okay, so she’d panicked herself into protecting her mother, had assumed that Rob was targeting only her mother, and had brought everything between them crashing to a halt.
And why was that? Despite all her efforts, did she still really believe that at her center she was a useless child scrabbling to pretend that all was right with her world, terrified that she’d be taken away from her mother if she let on how bad things really were? Was she still terrified of the feelings Rob stirred in her?
If that was true, she really had learned nothing. Ally jumped up from the table and went to find her cell phone. She punched in Rob’s home number and got his voice mail.
“Rob? It’s Ally. I’ll help you find out how Susan died, okay? Just tell me what you want me to do.”
 
To work off her tension while she waited to hear back from Rob, Ally set to work on the dining room. She stacked the last of the boxes in the garage, polished the furniture, and vacuumed the ratty carpet. By the time she finished, the room looked about a million times better than it had before, and Ally was exhausted.
The sun was low in the sky now, light streaming through the kitchen windows and warming up the countertops. Ally pulled the blinds and made herself a tuna sandwich on rye. She sat at the table and poured herself a big glass of milk. She frowned at the glass. If he turned up, would Rob bring beer?
If he turned up.
Ally got up, put the milk carton away, and rummaged in the cutlery drawer for a pair of scissors. She couldn’t find one and yanked the second drawer open. Stuffed into the drawer was one of her mother’s black journals. Ally held her breath as she retrieved the book and saw the scissors underneath it.
She vaguely remembered shoving the book into the drawer to avoid one of her visitors seeing it, but she couldn’t remember which one. She’d been surprised that anyone had bothered to come and see her. Mrs. Orchard had popped in with brownies, Nadia with freshly ground coffee, and even Mrs. Ford, one of her neighbors, had brought her a casserole.
With shaking hands, Ally returned to her seat and checked the date written on the inside cover of the book. Was this the book she’d thought was missing, and what should she do if it was?
When she realized it was a much later journal, the last one her mother had written, she tried to relax. She’d started reading it a while back and never finished it. Ally found her place and started again, eating her sandwich as she read.
 
I just got back from the specialist’s office and it’s not good. I have breast cancer. They’re going to try all that chemo and stuff on me, but I don’t think there’s much hope. I could see it in their faces, and I know it in my soul. I can feel it, the cancer, creeping through me. The only thing I’m sorry about is that I can’t tell Ally. Nadia says I should call her, but I can’t. I don’t think all is well with Ally, and I don’t want to burden her with all this crap. Why should she have to put up with a dying woman out of duty? I have friends here who will help me through. I have friends. I’d rather Ally kept away.
 
Ally gritted her teeth. Would she have come back? She checked the date on the top of the page. Hell, she’d been in rehab at that time, hardly able to do anything for herself, let alone for anyone else. She swallowed back tears. Dammit, she was not going to cry again.
Unbidden, a memory of going to the zoo with Ruth surfaced. For once, her mother’s attention had all been on her. They’d had snow cones, bought food to feed the elephants, and laughed together at the antics of the penguins. On the way back, she’d snuggled up against her mother and fallen asleep, a new cuddly teddy bear clutched to her chest.
When they’d arrived home, the man her mother had kicked out two weeks previously met them at the door, and Ruth had run straight into his arms. Ally had made her own supper and taken herself to bed, knowing even at seven that her mother wouldn’t notice her again for days. Eventually she’d stopped hoping that Ruth would notice her at all. . . .
The ring of the front doorbell made her jump and close the book. It was dusk now, and she was reading in the dark, her glass of milk grown warm beside her. She made her way up the hallway and recognized Rob’s distinctive shape through the glass. For a moment she paused. Did she want him here? She’d much rather have this conversation over the phone.
She opened the door, and Rob inclined his head. “Hey.”
“Hey, would you like to come in?”
“Sure.”
Ally stood back so that he could precede her into the hall. He was wearing his brown uniform and his cop face, and she couldn’t decide if that was good or bad. If he was able to keep things separate, so could she.
“So what can I do for you, Ally?”
She invited him to sit down, but he refused, which meant she had to keep looking up at him. She wrapped her arms tightly around herself.
“As I said in my message, I’m willing to help you catch whoever broke into my house.”
He nodded. “And do you have any further information you’d like to share with us at this point?”
“Are you suggesting I know who it is and just haven’t gotten around to mentioning it yet?”
He simply stared at her, his blue eyes devoid of emotion. “Any information would be welcome at this point.”
“I haven’t got anything new to tell you, but I did want to offer my services if you need to set a trap for this person.”
“Set yourself up as bait?”
“If that’s what it takes.”
Rob regarded her for a long moment. “That’s very generous of you. I’ll keep it in mind.”
“Okay, then.” Ally tried to keep her voice light. What had she expected? That the moment he saw her, he’d instantly understand that she’d changed her mind and beg her to come back to him? With the history of their relationship, she could hardly expect that. If she wanted him—and even thinking that terrified her—she’d have to do all the work, and she was so scared of being rejected. With a small sigh, she turned back toward the front door. “I’ll see you out.”
The kitchen clock chimed nine times just as they reached the front door, and she put her hand on the new latch only to have Rob reach over her head and gently close the door again. She turned to look at him and found herself pressed up against the wall while he thoroughly kissed her.
When he was done, he stepped back and wiped his mouth. “My shift just finished.”
“So you kissed me.”
He rubbed his thumb over her lower lip. “I know how you like me to keep my private and public lives separate.”
“About that . . .”
He pressed his thumb over her lips and shook his head. “Let’s not go there, okay? Let’s keep this professional.”
“But you just kissed me.”
He raised his eyebrows. “That was an aberration. I won’t do it again.”
She bit his thumb and he cursed. “Rob, I’m trying to be brave here and sort things out with you, and you don’t want to hear me?”
His gaze softened. “Honey, I could listen to you all night, but I’m serious. Let’s sort out these problems one at a time, okay?”
“And if we can’t solve them?”
“Ally, I’ve been a cop for quite a while. In my experience, once someone crazy gets all stirred up over something, they usually can’t stop even if they want to. And the more frustrated and angry they get, the harder they’ll try to achieve their aim.”
“Which is me leaving town.”
“We don’t know that for sure. It might just mean you leaving this house. Whatever secrets it conceals might be better staying hidden.”
“But you just said that the person who started all this won’t stop no matter what I do.”
He stared down at her. “It’s okay. We’ll keep you safe. I can promise you that.”
“But you can’t, can you?” Ally whispered. “Because we don’t know who this person is or exactly what they want.”
He cupped her jaw. “We’ll keep you safe.”
She leaned into his palm like a cat seeking a caress and nuzzled his palm, drawing a rough sound of need from him. But this wouldn’t do. She couldn’t just give up and expect him to protect her every minute of the day. She was a grown-up. She reluctantly moved away from him and opened the front door.
“Thanks, Sheriff. Let me know when you need me.”
“Ally . . .”
She manufactured a bright smile. “I promise I’ll call if I’m the slightest bit worried, okay?” She gently pushed him out the door and shut it in his face. She pressed her hand to her heart, which seemed to be aching, which was quite ridiculous.
It seemed to take forever for Rob to start his engine and pull off the drive. Ally waited until she was sure he was gone and then walked back down to the kitchen. She’d make herself some hot chocolate, finish reading Ruth’s journal, and put herself to bed.
 
Ally yawned and glanced at her bedside clock. It was past eleven, and she had to work in the morning. She put her empty mug on the nightstand and set her alarm. She’d almost finished the last journal. Ruth’s struggle to accept that she was dying had kept Ally’s attention despite herself, and she felt even more sympathy for her mom.
Just as she switched off her lamp, she heard a crash that seemed to come from the rear of the house. With shaking hands, she wiggled back into her shorts and shoved her feet into her flip-flops. She checked the pockets. Where the hell was her cell phone? She could only find her front door keys. Had she left it in the kitchen to recharge? There was no way she was heading back there to find out.
Ally tried to calm her panic and rationalize her actions. Yeah, she was scared, but no one could get in, could they? She had new locks on her doors. But what if someone had broken the glass and gotten in through the window? That thought was enough to propel her out of bed and to the door of her room, where she crouched down to listen.
She couldn’t hear anyone, but that didn’t mean there wasn’t anyone there. She opened the door a crack and peered down the hallway toward the kitchen. Moonlight caught shards of glass glinting on the floor, and Ally’s stomach did a peculiar flip. She definitely wasn’t stupid enough to wander on down to the kitchen. She would do what any regular woman would do and run like hell.
She crawled on her hands and knees in the opposite direction toward the front door and knelt up to open the latch. She half turned her head so that she could still see down the hallway, and something skittered across her vision. The door latch clicked as she opened it, but she didn’t care. As it swung back into its lock, she sprinted away from the house and headed for Rob’s. There was no logic to her decision; she just knew she had to get to him and Jackson.
It seemed to take forever to get there and bang on the back door. Jackson opened up and she fell into his arms.
“Ally, what the hell?”
She let him guide her farther into the house, heading for the only lit room. She hesitated as she saw Rob sitting up in Jackson’s bed, his hair disheveled, his skin gleaming with exertion. Ally inhaled the scent of sex and clung on to the door frame as her world took yet another crazy swing.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt anything.”
Jackson put his hands on her shoulders and brought her firmly into the room. “You’re not interrupting. Now, what’s going on?”
Jackson’s calm voice steadied Ally. “I think someone was trying to break into my house.” She laughed hysterically. “What a night. And here you two are, sharing a bed. Am I supposed to scream at you now, Rob? Or will you tell me it was all Jackson’s idea?”
Rob reached out and drew her into his lap. She could smell Jackson on him, and the musky scent of come. “Ally, we’ll get to that in a moment. Now tell me what happened.”
She leaned into him as he stroked her back. “I was just going to bed when I heard something that sounded like glass breaking at the back of my house.”
Rob looked up at Jackson. “Call Jeff. He’s out on patrol. Ask him to take a look and report back.”
Jackson disappeared, and she heard him talking on the radio. Suddenly she felt so tired that she couldn’t even pull free of Rob’s comforting grasp. She closed her eyes as he stroked her hair back from her face.
“You did the right thing by getting out of there, honey.”
“I’m not one of those stupid chicks in the movies who just has to go and check out the cellar, you know.”
His quiet chuckle rumbled in his chest. “I know that. I’m just glad you’re okay.”
Jackson reappeared, his expression grim. “Jeff says the kitchen window is broken, but there’s no sign of entry. He’s going to stick a piece of plywood over the hole so everything’s secured, and he’ll keep an eye on the place for the rest of the night.”
“Don’t I need to go and check it out?” Ally asked.
“You’re in shock, honey. You’d better stay with us and we’ll all take a look in the morning.”
Ally started to pull away from Rob’s hold. “No, it’s okay. I don’t want to be in the way.”
Jackson appeared on her other side, effectively blocking off her exit. “You’re staying right here between us, where you belong.”
God, she didn’t have the strength to argue anymore, because he was right. At this moment, there was no other place she would rather be. Jackson got into the bed, and Rob drew the covers up over them all. Ally lay on her back between the two men, who both had an arm around her. She felt her eyelids begin to droop as their combined warmth and solidly reassuring presence surrounded her. But it was no good.
“Can we talk about this?”
“Don’t you just want to sleep?” Jackson murmured.
Rob groaned. “She’s a woman, Jackson. She won’t sleep until everything has been sorted out to her satisfaction.”
Ally put her hand on Rob’s chest. “When did you two get together?”
“When Jackson finally got over himself and begged me to fuck him.”
“I didn’t beg.”
“Yeah, you did. You wanted it real bad.”
“Sure, I wanted you, but I wasn’t that desperate.”
Ally put her other hand on Jackson’s chest. “I’m not surprised that it happened. I’m just wondering when it happened.”
Rob shifted his weight, and Ally became aware of his erection prodding her hip. “Recently. Which is why Jackson can’t keep his hands off me.”
“Like you’re any better.”
Ally realized Jackson was also erect. She resisted the temptation to slide her hands lower and squeeze both of their cocks so hard that they stopped all the man talk and gave her the truth. She struggled to sit up.
“I want to go home.”
Both the men went still. Rob recovered his voice first. “You can’t, honey. It’s not safe.”
“Then I want to sleep by myself. I can use your room, Rob, seeing as you’ve moved in here.” She shot Jackson a look. “Perhaps Jane had it right after all and you really do want Rob all to yourself.”
Jackson’s face went blank. “That’s not what I want, Ally. I want you both—I swear it.”
Ally managed to scramble out of the bed. “Good night, guys. See you in the morning.”
Rob started after her. “Ally, don’t do this.”
She held up a hand to stop him. “You were the one who said we should leave all the personal stuff alone until we solved this case. So let’s do that, shall we?”
She made her way to Rob’s bed and cuddled up in his lemon-scented sheets. She couldn’t deal with all this right now; her mind seemed to be spiraling out of her control as if she were looking down on herself from a great distance. She hugged Rob’s pillow and stared into the darkness as shivers racked her body. She couldn’t believe how much she wanted to crawl back into bed with Jackson and Rob. Had they decided she wasn’t worth the risk and consoled each other? She shied away from the thought that they didn’t need her anymore and were just being kind. She just couldn’t deal with it.
 
Rob lay back on the pillow and stared up at the ceiling. “Well, fuck.”
Jackson sat on the side of the bed, his expression unreadable. He smoothed the rumpled bedsheets with his long fingers. “If you want to go to her, I’m okay with it.”
Rob scowled. “No, we’ve already been through this. We’re all in this together. Ally’s just had one too many shocks in one night.”
“And what if she doesn’t get over it, Rob? What do we do then?”
Rob understood the tension in Jackson’s voice all too well. He knew how hard it had been for Jackson to finally give in to his desire for him. “She’ll get over it. She loves us both.” He patted the sheets. “Now get into bed and let’s try and get some sleep.”
 
He woke up suddenly in complete darkness and heard the faint sounds of Ally crying. He got out of bed and went to her, picked her up, and brought her back into Jackson’s bed. She didn’t seem to be quite awake, so he kissed her and soothed her with his mouth and hands until she started to kiss him back, her mouth hot and desperate against his, her fingernails scraping at his flesh.
“Honey, it’s okay. Just go to sleep, all right?”
“But I want . . .”
God, Rob wanted it, too, but this wasn’t the right moment. They’d be taking advantage of her whether she realized it or not. He kissed her forehead and guided her back down onto the pillows. “Just sleep, okay?”
She murmured his name, turned her face against his shoulder, and started to relax. He could feel the wetness of her tears against his chest, and it made him want to forget all his obligations to keep citizens safe and rip apart whoever was hurting Ally with his bare hands.
Much later he woke up to see slivers of light coming through the blinds. Ally was touching him again, and his cock was already responding. He couldn’t stop her this time; he just couldn’t. He sensed Jackson waking up, too, and guided his friend’s hands and mouth onto Ally as well. She seemed to welcome the urgency they felt and grabbed Jackson’s hand and pressed it between her legs. She began to move against him. Rob kissed her neck and then moved lower to her breasts, tugging hard on her nipples as Jackson buried his face between her legs and licked and suckled her there.
Rob closed his eyes to experience everything better, the wet sounds of Jackson sucking Ally’s cunt, her moans and soft cries as Rob teased her breasts. He dragged her hand down to his cock and then wrapped his fingers around Jackson’s. They all moved together as if they’d practiced such erotic exercises countless times.
God, he wanted to fuck them both, wanted them both to fuck him so badly. Ally tugged on his cock, and he fell forward until she took him deep into her mouth. Jackson moved as well and slid his cock inside Ally. When Jackson made her climax for the third time, Rob touched Jackson’s shoulder and they changed places, Rob now inside Ally’s sex and Jackson in her mouth. Hot and wet and gripping him like a fist. Rob luxuriated in the feel of Ally’s sheath, and he drove into her.
And then they moved again. Jackson was now on his back with Ally straddling him. Rob groaned when Jackson grabbed him by the dick and licked the crown of his cock. He groaned even harder when Jackson twisted around to take him fully into his mouth. Rob felt Ally watching him and kissed her, connecting them all, making them all scream together when they climaxed.
And then Ally settled between them, her body boneless with pleasure, and that, perhaps, was the best thing of all. Rob’s arm crossed over her hips, and he could still touch Jackson. And Jackson did the same. Rob let his eyes start to close. Ally was safe—at least for the next few hours. He’d worry about all the other stuff in the morning.