Chapter 17

“Claudia! Claudia!” It was Gamma calling me, but I couldn’t see her. Where was I? My vision cleared as I looked around, only to realize that I was at the same unpaved road. It suddenly came to me that I was at the Crossroads. Why were we here? Then I heard Gamma’s voice again.

“Claudia! Claudia!”

“Where are you, Gamma?” I yelled.

I started walking around in circles, looking for her. I was about to give up when I saw her at a distance, inside the field.

“Gamma?” I shrieked in disbelief.

She walked toward me with a horrified look in her eyes. Her expression frightened me.

“Run, Claudia!” she yelled. “You don’t belong here.”

My mouth dropped in shock from what I had seen and heard. I didn’t want to run. I wanted to hold her. She said it again, but this time with more urgency.

“Run, Claudia! They’re coming for you.”

I did as told. I didn’t know why I was running or whom I was running away from, but my heart was pounding. All of a sudden, I couldn’t breathe; I grabbed my throat, gasping for air.

“Wake up, Claudia.” I recognized his voice. Austin was shaking me. “Are you all right? It must have been some dream.”

I roused from sleep and realized we were still in his car. “Yeah…um…sorry…didn’t mean to scare you like that,” I replied as I sat up, feeling embarrassed. I quickly rubbed the back of my palm to my mouth to make sure that I wasn’t drooling.

“It’s okay. It looked like you couldn’t breathe. I thought I was going to have to do CPR on you.” He winked with a smile.

“Very funny,” I said, fixing my hair.

“Well, here we are.”

He had driven me to the hospital instead of my house. I couldn’t remember what I had asked him to do, but I was glad we were at the hospital because this was where I wanted to be. “Thanks, Austin.” I dashed out of the car, anxious to see Gamma. “I really appreciate it.” I closed the car door behind me. I was just about to walk away when he rolled down the window.

“Glad to help. I would go in there with you—”

I interrupted because I didn’t want him to feel like he had to act like a gentleman and walk me in. He had done enough. “No, don’t worry. I should face this alone. I wouldn’t want you to see me…” Searching for the right words and anxious to get going, I said quickly, “You know what I mean. See you later.” I took a few steps, but he wasn’t finished.

“Claudia, I’m not saying that she is going to die, but you have to prepare for the worst too.”

I nodded, half listening. “You’re right,” I said quickly.

“You can call or text me anytime,” he said.

“Thanks,” I replied and walked away quickly. I didn’t mean to be rude, but I was anxious to get to Gamma before it was too late.

I took a deep breath and headed toward the hospital entrance. I felt tiny approaching this huge building. I glanced at all the windows and wondered which room was Gamma’s. In the middle of the hospital building was a big and bold sign that read General Hospital. A person would have to be blind to miss it. A security guard at the entrance stopped me and asked what the purpose of my visit was.

“I’m here for Gamma, I mean, Lucy Reed.”

I was so used to calling her Gamma that I had almost forgotten her real name. I was also quite shaken up by the fact that I was actually here, which meant that it was real. As I was waiting for him, I squinted for fear that he would inform me that I was too late. Instead, he gave me a long plastic strip.

“Please place this on your wrist. Here, I can help you. Go straight through the door, hang a right, then a left. And a lady will be there to help you.”

“Thank you,” I said, feeling relieved.

He gave me some hope that I was not too late, but then I wondered if he even knew anything about the patients in intensive care. As I walked further in, I discovered I was alone. There weren’t any other visitors. For a hospital this big, I would’ve expected to see many more; however, it was dark and I was sure visiting hours would be ending soon. Go straight through the door, hang a right, and then a left, I repeated his instructions over and over in my head so I wouldn’t forget. Every which way I looked was a corridor leading to another hallway. It was like a maze in here. A lady was behind a counter, seemingly not very busy.

“Yes…?” Her voice lingered, as she looked up at me, appearing to be annoyed. “May I help you?” she asked in a rather snobbish manner.

How rude! I thought. No wonder people don’t like going to the hospital. “I’m here to see Gamma, I mean, Lucy Reed.”

“Who?” she asked again, looking irritated.

“Lucy Reed.”

She quickly looked at her chart, flipping through a few pages. “Fifth floor, room 512,” she said, pointing straight ahead.

“Thank you,” I said, as I moved ahead anxiously.

The long hallway seemed endless as I stepped out of the elevator. Curiosity got the best of me as I quickly glanced at the occupied rooms. I couldn’t help but feel depressed by the ambiance, although it was comforting to observe the families caring for their elders. My mom always reminded me to see Gamma as much as I could. Her words were strongly embedded in my head, “Be good to those who are alive, because what good is it when they are dead?” It made more sense to me now, knowing that it may be the last time I would see her. I wanted to be able to tell her and show her how much she meant to me.

The numbers read closer to 512; I was almost there. I could feel my heart racing. I concentrated on the room numbers, afraid that I would pass her room. As if my heart wasn’t racing fast enough, it started beating even faster and louder, so that I was certain the nurses could hear my anxiety attack. Finally—room 512. Apprehensively, I walked in; it was a sight I hadn’t prepared myself for. Gamma looked lifeless and motionless. She was hooked up to an IV, with an oxygen tube in her nose, and a tube running down her throat, forcing her mouth open.

“Oh, Gamma.” My heart sunk to the floor. I thought I was going to lose control, but I forced myself to feel nothing. I was afraid to touch her or to hold her; she appeared so fragile. Gently I reached for her hands, but they were cold and unresponsive. Softly I cupped them with my two hands to give her some warmth. I took a deep breath, not wanting to have a breakdown. I completely blocked myself from reality and pretended she was asleep.

“Can you hear me?” I asked softly. “It’s me, Claudia.”

Startled by the twitches from her fingers, I immediately dropped her hands and stood up. Was that her way of communicating with me? I was hopeful that she would wake up, so I asked again. “Can you hear me, Gamma? Please wake up. I’m here. I know you’ve been waiting for me. Let’s go home,” I pleaded, touching her forehead, her cheeks, and finally, her hands.

Upsettingly, there was no response. I looked at her intensely, as to not forget her face. I realized the deeply rooted wrinkles in her forehead had eased. Was she in pain? Could she hear me? Many thoughts ran through my mind. Just then, a doctor entered, and I jumped with surprise to see someone come in. I was startled to see such a young doctor. Would he have the experience to help Gamma? He was attentive and tried to answer all my questions to put my mind at ease. He started off with words I could not understand, all that medical jargon, but immediately realized I wasn’t comprehending.

He paused and spoke again. “Basically your grandmother had a massive stroke. She is unable to breathe alone, as you can see. She is hooked up to an oxygen tube. Given her age, surgery would only complicate the situation. Most likely, if she even wakes up from her coma, she will be severely impaired. To what extent cannot be determined. I am very sorry.”

“I am sorry” meant that she didn’t have a fighting chance of recovery, and hearing those words from her doctor made it that much more difficult to bear. “Thank you, doctor,” was all I could say.

“Excuse me,” he said. He shone a light in her eyes and nose, and shook her for response. I was upset by the sight of him shaking her like that. I wanted to yell at him to stop, but I knew he was doing his job. I couldn’t bear to watch, so I turned around. Then he headed for the door.

“I’ll be with other patients, but if you have any questions or concerns, just have any one of the nurses page me.”

“Thank you,” I said solemnly.

Focusing on Gamma, I started speaking to her again. “Please, wake up,” I said, as if she could hear me. I had read an article about a patient being able to hear their loved ones while in a coma. Whether this was true or not, I had to try.

I sat there for who knows how long. Mom had texted me back to let me know she had been here earlier, but had to leave because of an emergency at work. They needed additional nurses, but she said she would meet me as soon as she could. It didn’t bother me; in fact, I was happy to have this time alone with Gamma. I wasn’t sure how long she had. I embraced her with my arms gently around her shoulders, trying not to disturb the tubes that were keeping her alive, and rested my head lightly on her chest. As I told her that I loved her, I didn’t even fight the tears; instead, I welcomed them.

“Come on, fight!” I said out loud to her. “You still have much to live for. You can’t leave me, especially now!” I wanted to tell her about Michael, and about speaking to the angels. I knew she would be fascinated by my stories. Suddenly, I felt movement and then a light grip on my shoulders; I looked up to see Gamma’s eyes, opened wide and alert. The tube in her mouth was out. She must’ve pulled it out just before she grabbed me.

“Gamma!” I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was ecstatic. Either the doctor had misdiagnosed her, or this was truly a miracle. “Do you know where you are?” I stared, waiting for her to respond.

Without warning, she pulled me closer. “Claudia, listen carefully. I’ve been waiting for you. I can’t wait any longer. Please listen carefully as it may come as a shock. I’ve been protecting you.”

Protecting me? Was she hallucinating? What was she talking about? I listened intently, trying to make sense of what she was saying.

She continued after a pause. “I knew your mother. I promised your mother…would look after you…keep you safe.”

“My mother? Of course you know her,” I said, reassuring her that she did, thinking she was out of her mind.

“What I’m about to say…difficult to believe…listen carefully. You need to know. The mother you live with, Ava Emerson…not your real mother. Adopted.”

My eyes widened with shock at first. Then I thought something must have happened to the part of her brain that held her memory. I just sat there, listening to humor her, and didn’t say a word.

“You were sent from the clouds, Ava would say. She named you Claudia.”

“Yes, Gamma, I know the story. Mom told me she thought she couldn’t have children and that I was a blessing from above,” I said, caressing her hands, trying to play along with her made-up story that I was adopted.

She shook her head. “I’m not making this up. Your real mother, Sophia, was my dear friend. She had a short relationship with a man, but he was not an ordinary man. Your father was one of God’s first angels. And because only God’s first angels or their offspring have the soul of the Holy Spirit, I had to protect your soul.”

“My father was one of God’s first angels,” I mumbled. I was trying to make sense of all this while I was in complete disbelief. I had to decide whether she was telling me the truth or losing her mind. But God’s first angels and having a soul of the Holy Spirit was something she couldn’t just conjure up in her mind. If she was telling me the truth, why hadn’t she told me sooner? Not that this kind of news was easy to explain. I already had background knowledge of what the Holy Spirit’s soul was, so I could understand the severity of what she was telling me.

Every fiber in my body was fighting back the shock, confusion, and anger brewing inside me; but Gamma was sick, so I had to watch my tone. “What do you mean by protecting my soul?” I asked calmly, although I was fuming. I was nearly having a heart attack. It was too much to bear.

She didn’t answer my question. Instead she started talking again. “This may come as a surprise to you. I don’t have time to explain. I’m an earth angel.”

“Earth angel?” My eyes widened with disbelief. I remembered Phillip telling me about them, but it was unfathomable that Gamma was one.

Gamma continued, “You were in danger. I knew others would be looking for you,” she said.

Aden popped into my mind. My mind was being pulled into all different directions, wanting to know more, not knowing what questions to ask. Gamma snapped me out of my thoughts when she continued to speak again.

“Sophia, your birth mother, told me that a fallen angel was after your soul. You were just a baby when your birth mother was murdered by him. I’m sorry that I couldn’t save her. I promised her that I would watch over you and find a nice family for you so that you could have a normal life.”

I placed my head down on the bed to soak all this in. Immediately Gamma placed her hand on my head. She was trying to comfort me, and for the first time, she couldn’t. I needed to be strong and get more answers, so I refocused. I looked up. Gamma had her eyes closed.

“Gamma…Ava Emerson, my mom, does she know any of this?” It was strange to ask this question. I had known her all my life as my mom.

“No.”

“So, she thinks I’m her biological daughter?”

“Yes.”

“Is Ava Emerson human?”

“Yes.”

“Sophia, my real mom, was she human?”

“Yes,” Gamma said quickly, and gasped for air.

I was trying to find a way to help her through this, but all I could do was watch. She took a deep breath.

“Are you all right?” I asked compassionately.

She nodded.

“My father is one of God’s first angels?” I asked nervously and swallowed hard.

“Yes.”

I paused, looking at her with narrowed eyes, wondering if I had heard what she had just said. I had no words. She kept nodding her head, trying to reassure me that what she was saying was true. I looked away. I didn’t want to believe her. I didn’t want it to be true. How could this be?

She continued. “I know you’ve been to the Crossroads.”

I blinked my eyes at her in alarm. “What?” I whispered. How did she know?

“When you were a child, you would dream about the Crossroads, and you would travel there through your dreams. Somehow, subconsciously, you knew such a place existed. But I stopped you. I pulled you back. The last time you went there was about a year ago. You stopped going there, so I didn’t monitor you any longer, but I should have continued. You found your way there again, didn’t you?”

“Yes,” I nodded. At that moment, I remembered Michael telling me that I would disappear without a warning. It was Gamma who had pulled me away. “How did you know?”

“It is difficult to explain, but I knew when a fallen angel named Aden tracked me down. I thought you were safe. This is my fault. I could have prevented this if only I hadn’t stopped monitoring you. My poor judgment has caused this.”

“But why? Why did you pull me away? Why must I stay away from the Crossroads?” I asked.

“Going to the Crossroads is not the problem. Sometimes, human souls wander there when they have near death experiences. It’s when you crossed over to Halo City; I was trying to protect you from crossing over, but I was too late,” she answered.

“Why must I not cross over?”

“When you cross over to Halo City, your aura becomes different. And having the soul of the Holy Spirit complicates things. You hold the key to our survival.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. Then, I remembered Phillip telling me that the fallen may be after me because crossing over to Halo City will cause my aura to stand out. “No, no, no!” I shook my head vigorously. “It’s not me. It can’t be me. Why me? I’m not special. I have no powers.”

“It’s you,” she said.

I didn’t want it to be true. “Make it stop. I don’t want this,” I said, not realizing my grip had tightened on her blanket.

“You have your father’s soul. You can’t stop, or fight, destiny. Don’t fight what you cannot control. Fight for what you can. It’s too late. It has begun. The fallen are multiplying by the hands of one angel. He is creating his army now that he knows you exist. We have to stop them, or humanity will be lost forever.”

“Soul of the Holy Spirit” now registered loud and clear. Feeling dizzy again from information overload, I felt the room closing in. Covering my face with the palms of my hands, I saw my whole life flash before me, realizing that my life was a lie.

Now I knew why Aden was after me. Inside me was the soul of the Holy Spirit. He needed my soul not only to open the gates to the Crossroads, but to regain his powers. There was nothing I could do about it. But there was one thing I could control; I had to give my soul to Aden willingly, and I was not about to give him that. He could hunt me down for the rest of my life. I would never give him my soul.

She turned away from me. “Claudia, my time has come,” she said sorrowfully. “I must leave you now.”

“No, Gamma, please! Don’t leave me! I need you!” I begged, wrapping my arms around her, even though I knew it was useless.

“I’m too old. I can’t help you anymore. I’m so sorry that I won’t be able to protect you, but I asked someone to watch over you so I can leave you in peace.” She spoke so softly, it was hard to hear her words. “You are a miracle. I’m so proud to have watched you grow into a fine young woman. You have a big responsibility ahead of you. You must have faith in yourself, faith in others who want to help you, and especially faith in the one you cannot see. Find my letter, and everything will be clear.”

Before I had a chance to ask her who she had asked to watch over me and where I was to find her letter, her eyes widened and her face elongated with terror. “Run, Claudia! They’re coming!”

“Who’s coming?” I asked anxiously.

Beep! Beep! Beep! The heart monitor beeped out of control, alerting the nurses.

As the nurses rushed through the doors, I stepped out of the way. They were trying to revive her when I heard the heart monitor sound go flat. It was a while before one of the nurses turned to me.

“I’m so sorry. I’ll give you some time alone.”

I knew what “I’m sorry” meant. I just couldn’t believe it. What made everything worse was that I had many questions, and Gamma was the only one who could answer them. As the nurses left, I reached for Gamma again. Knowing she would go to a peaceful place gave me a sense of peace.

“Good-bye, Gamma. I love you,” I said quietly and kissed her on the cheek. As I gave her a last hug, I closed my eyes tightly to stop the tears from falling. Unbelievably, I had none to shed. I rested my head on her chest, but could hear no sound. All the monitors that kept her alive were turned off, and the room was still and quiet. I thought my ears were playing tricks on me when I suddenly heard Gamma’s voice again. “Run, Claudia!”

Surprised to hear her voice, I looked at her, but she was lifeless. Was I hallucinating? Just like in my dream, she was telling me to run, but there was no sign of evidence she was alive. Unexpectedly, a low beam of light glowed from her body. My eyes widened both with astonishment and fear, and I backed away. Her spirit was being lifted right out of her body. Her radiating soul rose higher and higher. Her body was in perfect form, burning like a star. “Run, Claudia. Now! They are coming!” she said once more.

Frightened by Gamma’s warning, I ran to the door. I looked to the left, then to the right, but I didn’t see anyone, not even the nurse that was stationed at her desk. Then the lights in the hospital went off, and the only lights visible were the emergency lights, situated dimly on the floor. It was dark, but there was just enough glow for me to get around. Strong warning signals were shooting through my veins. The crystal on my neck vibrated and turned black. I knew what that meant—the fallen was near.

“Go right!” Gamma was directing me.

I didn’t listen. Curiously, I looked left and what I saw paralyzed me with fear. It was Aden, with at least twenty others. They stood at a distance making it difficult to recognize their faces, but I knew who they were. I turned once more to face Gamma, and that’s when her spirit vanished, her body remaining still. I was petrified by what had happened. Her spirit was gone, and I was left alone. There would be no more guiding words from her, and fear overtook me.

I turned right just as Gamma had instructed, and I ran for my life. Afterward, I didn’t know which way to go. Gamma’s only instruction was to turn right. Do I turn left or right again? Then I realized the sounds of their footsteps stopped. It was silent, and the only sound was the beating from my own heart. I could imagine them gliding after me. Periodically I turned my head, only to see them closing in on me. As I turned again, all of the fallen were gone except—for Aden.