CHAPTER 4
You have to go back to the beginning, to
that freezing miserable afternoon in Brooklyn when Quentin took the
Brakebills exam, to understand what happened to Julia. Because
Julia took the Brakebills exam that day too. And after she took it,
she lost three years of her life.
Her story started the same day Quentin’s did, but
it was a very different kind of story. On that day, the day he and
James and Julia walked along Fifth Avenue together on the way to
the boys’ Princeton interviews, Quentin’s life had split wide open.
Julia’s life hadn’t. But it did develop a crack.
It was a hairline crack at first. Nothing much to
look at it. It was cracked, but you could still use it. It was
still good. No point in throwing her life away. It was a perfectly
fine life.
Or no, it wasn’t fine, but it worked for a while.
She’d said good-bye to James and Quentin in front of the brick
house. They’d gone in. She’d walked away. It had started to rain.
She’d gone to the library. This much she was pretty sure was true.
This much had probably actually happened.
Then something happened that didn’t happen: she’d
sat in the library with her laptop and a stack of books and written
her paper for Mr. Karras. It was a damn good paper. It was about an
experimental utopian socialist community in New York State in the
nineteenth century. The community had some praiseworthy ideals but
also some creepy sexual practices, and eventually it lost its mojo
and morphed into a successful silverware company instead. She had
some ideas about why the whole arrangement worked better as a
silverware company than it had as an attempt to realize Christ’s
kingdom on Earth. She was pretty sure she was right. She’d gone
into the numbers, and in her experience when you went into the
numbers you usually came out with pretty good answers.
James met her at the library. He told her what had
happened with the interview, which was weird enough as it was, what
with the interviewer turning up dead and all. Then she’d gone home,
had dinner, gone up to her room, written the rest of the paper,
which took until four in the morning, grabbed three hours of sleep,
got up, blew off the first two classes while she fixed her
endnotes, and went to school in time for social studies. Mischief
managed.
When she looked back the whole thing had a queer,
unreal feeling to it, but then again you often get a queer, unreal
feeling when you stay up till four and get up at seven. Things
didn’t start to fall apart till a week later, when she got her
paper back.
The problem wasn’t the grade. It was a good grade.
It was an A minus, and Mr. K didn’t give out a lot of those. The
problem was—what was the problem? She read the paper again, and
though it read all right, she didn’t recognize everything in it.
But she’d been writing fast. The thing she snagged on was the same
thing Mr. K snagged on: she’d gotten a date wrong.
See, the utopian community she was writing about
had run afoul of a change in federal statutory rape laws—creepy,
creepy—that took place in 1878. She knew that. Whereas the paper
said 1881, which Mr. K would never have caught—though come to think
of it he was a pretty creepy character himself, and she wouldn’t be
surprised if he knew his way around a statutory rape law or
two—except Wikipedia made the same mistake, and Mr. K loved to do
spot-checking to catch people relying on Wikipedia. He’d checked
the date, and checked Wikipedia, and put a big red X in the
margin of Julia’s paper. And a minus after her A. He was
surprised at her. He really was.
Julia was surprised too. She never used Wikipedia,
partly because she knew Mr. K checked, but mostly because unlike a
lot of her fellow students she cared about getting her facts right.
She went back through the paper and checked it thoroughly. She
found a second mistake, and a third. No more, but that was enough.
She started checking versions of the paper, because she always
saved and backed up separate drafts as she went, because Track
Changes in Word was bullshit, and she wanted to know at what point
exactly the errors got in. But the really weird thing was there
that were no other versions. There was only the final draft.
This fact, although it was a minor fact, with
multiple plausible explanations, proved to be the big red button
that activated the ejector seat that blew Julia out of the cozy
cockpit of her life.
She sat on her bed and stared at the file, which
showed a time of creation that she remembered as having been during
dinner, and she felt fear. Because the more she thought about it
the more it seemed like she had two sets of memories for that
afternoon, not just one. One of them was almost too plausible. It
had the feel of a scene from a novel written by an earnest realist
who was more concerned with presenting an amalgamation of
naturalistic details that fit together plausibly than with telling
a story that wouldn’t bore the fuck out of the reader. It felt like
a cover story. That was the one where she went to the library and
met James and had dinner and wrote the paper.
But the other one was batshit insane. In the other
one she’d gone to the library and done a simple search on one of
the cheapo library workstations on the blond-wood tables by the
circulation desk. The search had yielded a call number. The call
number was odd—it put the book in the subbasement stacks. Julia was
pretty sure the library didn’t have any subbasement stacks, because
it didn’t have a subbasement.
As if in a dream she walked to the brushed-steel
elevator. Sure enough, beneath the round white plastic button
marked B, there was now also a round plastic button marked
SB. She pressed it. It glowed. The dropping sensation in her
stomach was just an ordinary dropping sensation, the kind you get
when you’re descending rapidly toward a subbasement full of cheap
metal shelving and the buzz of fluorescent lights and exposed pipes
with red-painted daisy-wheel valve handles poking out of them at
odd angles.
But that’s not what she saw when the elevator doors
opened. Instead she saw a sun-soaked stone terrace in back of a
country house, with green gardens all around it. It wasn’t actually
a house, the people there explained, it was a school. It was called
Brakebills, and the people who lived there were magicians. They
thought she might like to be one too. All she would have to do is
pass one simple test.