• Meanwhile, Back in the Parlor •

It was now almost midnight and a Victorian clock was pushing Twentieth Century minutes toward twelve. Its ticking was loud and methodical as it devoured July 13, 1902. Greer and Cameron casually but very carefully examined the parlor again to see if the Hawkline Monster had returned. It hadn’t.

They of course did not know that it was sound asleep, snoring in a jar full of chemicals in the laboratory and they were all safe for the time being.

After they were certain that the monster was not about, Greer said to Cameron, “I think it’s time we told them.”

“Told us what?” Miss Hawkline said.

“About the monster,” Greer said.

“What about it?” Miss Hawkline said.

Her sister had turned her attention from a cup of hot coffee in her hand to intently waiting for the next words from Greer.

Greer searched his mind to find the right words and a simple, logical sequence to tell them in. He paused a little too long because what he had to say was so fantastic that he could not easily find a simple way to say it. Finally the right words found him.

“The monster’s not down in the ice caves,” Greer said. “It’s here in the house. It’s been all over the place today. It spent a couple of hours sitting around your necks.”

“What?” Miss Hawkline said, incredulously.

Her sister put her cup of coffee down.

They were both now in a state of amused shock.

“The monster’s some kind of strange light that moves around followed by a goofy shadow,” Greer said. “I don’t know exactly how it works but it works and we’re going to destroy it. We don’t think there’s anything in the ice caves that we’ve got to kill. The light has the power to change things and to think and it can get into minds and fuck ‘em around. Have either of you noticed the light and the shadow that follows it like a dog?”

The Hawkline sisters did not say anything. They turned and stared at each other.

“Well?” Greer said.

Finally a Miss Hawkline spoke, “It’s a strange light that moves around with a clumsy shadow following it?” she said.

“Yeah, we’ve seen it all over the place,” Greer said.

“It’s been moving around with us, dogging us. For a long time this evening it was right there in your necklaces. It left a while ago and hasn’t been back since.”

“What you’re describing is one of the properties of The Chemicals,” Miss Hawkline said. “There’s a strange light in the jar and a kind of swirly awkward shadow that stays near the light and follows it when it moves in the jar. The light is an advanced stage of The Chemicals. Our father told us before he disappeared that the light would eventually be changed into something that would be extremely beneficial for all mankind.”

“We’ve needed some more chemicals to complete that change and those are the chemicals our poor butler brought us from Brooks. We were going to finish the experiment as soon as you killed the monster,” the other Miss Hawkline said.

“I wouldn’t finish anything,” Greer said. “I think what you should do is to throw that batch of stuff out and start over again. You’ve got something that’s out of control down there. I think that stuff killed your butler and is responsible for your father’s disappearance and it also changed one of you girls into an Indian and has fucked with our minds, too.”

The Hawkline sisters stared on, lost in deep silence.

“Let’s go down and get that jar of fucking stuff and throw it out and then get a good night’s sleep,” Cameron said. “I could stand it. I’ve never buried a dwarf before and I’m tired. I’ve fucked so much today I’m afraid my prick’s going to fall off.”

“The Chemicals were our father’s lifework,” Miss Hawkline said, breaking silence desperately. “He dedicated his life to The Chemicals.”

“We know that,” Cameron said. “And we think the fucking chemicals turned on him. Bit the hand that fed them, so to speak. You saw what it did to your butler. It killed him and changed his body into a dwarf. The devil only knows what that fucking stuff is going to do next. We’ve got to throw it out before we’re all changed into dead dwarfs. There’s nobody to bury us in a bunch of suitcases.”