CHAPTER TWELVE

DAYS passed with Taylor in a foul mood. He hadn’t seen Piper at work for most of the week, not even in passing. She was on a rotation of night shifts while he remained on days. He’d heard from his colleagues that this was her last week at the hospital. She’d obviously decided to cut short her assignment. He supposed that was for the best but, damn, it just didn’t feel right leaving things this way. He wanted to see her, even if it was at work. That didn’t sit well with him, either. He didn’t need anyone. He lived a single life and liked it that way. At least he had until Alex and Piper had burst into his life. The quiet that had once seemed therapeutic now created the opposite effect in him.

Restlessness as he’d never known plagued him night and day. The evening runs at the park weren’t enough to put his black mood to rest, even when he pushed himself harder than ever. Dreams of soft sighs and softer kisses haunted him.

He needed some action. Caroline would be returning in two days, so he could get back to his usual routine and perhaps that would be the answer he needed. He reached for the phone and called Santa Fe Jumpers. He hung up after a disappointing call. Full. Every damned day for the next two weeks. Tourists filling up the dockets. So he’d put in a reservation for weeks away, but that wasn’t going to ease the emptiness in him. He needed action, and he needed it now.

He knocked on Alex’s door on Saturday morning. “Hey, sport. Let’s get out of here and go do something.”

Alex opened the door. “Like what?”

“How about mountain biking? Or we can to go Tetilla Peak. I need to get out of here and go do something physical—how about you? Exercise your muscles a bit and get some fresh air. Shake off the cobwebs.”

With a vague shrug, Alex said, “I guess.”

“A little enthusiasm would be nice,” Taylor said with a sideways smile.

“I’ll get my hiking boots.”

“I’ll get the rest.”

No sooner had they set foot on the trail than a summer storm struck, soaking them to the skin in minutes. They raced back to the car and climbed in.

“How about Plan B?” Taylor asked, and wiped his wet face with a hand. Normally, the rain wouldn’t bother him, he’d faced worse weather over the years. But with Alex along, he couldn’t take the chance of him getting sick when his mother was due to return in two days. He was in the home stretch and didn’t want to screw anything up now.

“What’s that?”

“Dry clothes. Pizza. Movie and arcade.” What almost-teenager wouldn’t jump at that?

“Awesome, especially the dry part.” Alex shook his head like a wet dog and sprayed them both with water.

Taylor laughed at the kid’s antics. He was going to miss him. The laughter dropped right out of him and the smile faded from his face.

This was what Piper had been talking about.

This is what he had resisted for so long and now, right here, slapping him in the face, was his own admission that he was going to miss it, miss Alex. He glanced at Alex as he started the car. How had this happened? He was a confirmed bachelor. How had he succumbed to the lure of home and hearth? Piper, that’s how. Alex, that’s how. He’d never opened his eyes to the possibilities until they had overtaken his life, and he’d allowed them to without much in the way of resistance. Maybe subconsciously he’d wanted it and not known it? Psych 101, here we go. Self-analysis. Closing his eyes, a pang of remorse shook him. He just couldn’t be what Piper needed. Maybe he was broken inside and was unable to have a normal relationship, to see it through to what it could be. The word commitment apparently wasn’t a part of his vocabulary.

Now, he knew, it was best to let her go as she wanted. When you cared for someone you didn’t ride roughshod over them, or try to change their minds about something they were quite certain of, did you? Who was he trying to kid? In the end, they would probably go their separate way anyway. Piper had been right, he just hadn’t wanted to admit it.

But, dammit, he missed her. He blew out a sigh and turned on the wipers, then put the car in gear, but kept his foot on the brake. The windows fogged up on the inside, and he used the flat of his hand to wipe away the condensation. Having a car crash and ending up at his own ER was not going to be a way to spice up the weekend.

“Are we going, or what?” Alex asked.

“Yeah, we’re going.”

So they spent their afternoon a different way than anticipated and both of them loosened up, waiting for Caroline to return home.

“This is almost your last night with me,” Taylor said as they drove home, a pang of surprising longing spiking through his chest. What had begun as a nuisance and a favor to his sister had turned into a surprisingly good experience for him. For Alex, too, he hoped.

“Yeah. I kinda liked hanging with you, Uncle T.” Alex gave a quick glance at him.

“I liked hanging with you, too. I’ll have to make arrangements with your mom to have visitation weekends or something,” he said with a smile, reaching over and ruffling Alex’s hair. “I know I’m not your dad, but maybe you could spare me some time now and then.”

“My dad doesn’t really like me, I don’t think.” Alex shrugged and looked away.

A pang shot through Taylor as memories of his own father sprang to life. The man had taken the loyalty and commitment thing to the nth degree and had soured Taylor on life ever since. “Why do you think that?”

Alex fiddled with the hem of his shorts. “I don’t know. He kinda yells a lot, and when I’m at his house we don’t do anything. Just watch sports on TV.”

“Does your mom know?” Not that his own mother had been able to do anything to ease relations with his father. But Caroline would want to know, if she didn’t already.

“Yeah. She can’t do anything, though. The judge said I have to go.”

Taylor wondered if he could do something about it. If he could have a talk with Alex’s father. He snorted. He’d never liked the bastard, so he doubted that would go over well. If José didn’t want the kid, then he should give up his parental rights to Alex. That would be better than a parent who didn’t want his child and treated him like garbage. With his gut churning, he fought the urge to stick a fist up the guy’s nose and perform a lobotomy the hard way. Alex was a great kid and needed a better dad than the one he had. Taylor had survived because his uncle had helped him. He wanted to do the same for Alex. “Well, you can come to my house anytime you want to, okay? I’ll make sure you have a set of keys of your own.” This was a commitment he could make, one he vowed to never fail at.

“Okay.” Alex remained silent for a few minutes as they returned to town. “Can we have a party for Mom? I mean, like a welcome-home kinda party?”

“Sure. Got any ideas?”

“Cake for sure.”

“What kind?”

“Are you kidding? It has to be chocolate.”

Taylor laughed and let the tension of his past fade back to where it belonged. “Chocolate it is.”

They worked out plans for the next evening. They shopped and bought party favors, even a cake that Alex was sure she would like. Caroline was scheduled to have a late-afternoon flight into Albuquerque, then rent a car for the sixty-mile drive home to Santa Fe, declining Taylor’s offer to pick her up.

As they waited for her to arrive, Alex danced around in anticipation, unable to settle down for more than a second at a time. “Where is she? Can I call her cellphone?”

“Go ahead. Maybe she ran into traffic or something. There’s always construction in the summer.”

As Alex called his mother, Taylor’s cellphone rang. “Maybe that’s her now.”

“Hello?”

“Taylor? It’s Piper.”

His heart paused a beat as her voice filled his mind. “Hi. How are you?” Maybe she’d changed her mind, and he gripped the phone tighter, anticipation thrumming through him. Maybe she’d decided to stay on. Wasn’t this going to be her last night on assignment? Maybe she was calling to say goodbye or even say she’d extended her stay a while. What he wouldn’t give to spend another night with her. Another day. Another—

“I’m in the ER, and we just had a bad trauma come in.”

Immediately, his anticipatory mood deflated. Business. Nothing personal. “Isn’t there enough staff on?” He only got called when they were swamped, but right now he just didn’t want to go in. He wanted to have a nice evening with Alex and Caroline. The “Welcome Home” banner they had made hung precariously from the archway, and he reached up to secure it better.

“There is, but…God, Taylor. It’s Caroline!”

“What?” The happiness that had been inside him turned to a rock of dread.

“It’s her. She’s suffering multiple trauma and a possible head injury. We’re on the way to Radiology. You need to come now.”

Without another word, he snapped the phone shut and grabbed his keys from the counter, then stopped in mid-stride. Damn. What the hell was he going to tell Alex?

“She didn’t answer, so I left her a message.” Alex returned to the room and looked up at Taylor, stopping at the look on Taylor’s face. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s your mother.”

“She called? Is she almost here?”

“No, Piper called.”

“Can she come to the party, too?”

Choked by emotions, he took Alex by the shoulder and led him to a chair. Taylor needed to sit down, as well. God, how was he going to say this with his throat closing off? “She’s been in a car accident, and she’s at the hospital now.”

“Wh-what happened?” Alex began to tremble, and his wide eyes filled with tears. “Is she okay?”

“I don’t know. Piper’s taking care of her, and we need to go see her now.” Thank God Piper was taking care of her. At least that was one small consolation. He trusted Piper as no other.

“Okay.” Alex nodded, in obvious shock, his breathing quick. “Okay.”

“Let’s go.” Taylor kept his hand on Alex’s shoulder and led him to the car. Ten minutes later they raced through the ER doors and found Piper waiting for them.

“Come on, she’s over here,” Piper said, leading them to the first trauma room. Before she opened the curtain, she needed to prepare them. Somehow. She looked at Taylor, but couldn’t speak for a moment. How was she going to tell him? Tight-lipped, he gave a curt nod and stepped behind the curtain. In that brief visual exchange between them, he knew it was bad.

Piper knelt and hugged Alex, trying to offer some comfort to his trembling little body. “Your mom’s been in a bad car accident, and she’s not awake yet. She has some tubes and things hooked up to her to help her breathe and give her medicine, so it’s going to be a little scary when you first see her. I’ve checked everything myself and it’s all okay.” Nothing had been as difficult as telling this little boy his mom was near death. “I’ll go in with you so you won’t be scared.”

He sniffed and pulled back from her, obviously trying to be brave. “Okay. I’m ready.”

From experience, Piper knew that no child was ready to see their parent laid out on an ER stretcher hooked up to life support. She’d been twenty when it had happened to her, and sometimes she felt she still hadn’t recovered from the shock of seeing both her parents that way. “I’ll be with you, and Taylor’s here, too.”

Pale and silent, he only nodded, and Piper led him into the room.

Grim faced, Taylor stood on the opposite side of the room in deep conference with his coworker, Dr. Tony Santiago, who had stabilized Caroline. Piper spared them a glance, then concentrated on leading Alex forward.

Caroline was still unconscious, both eyes swollen shut, her nose broken and multiple lacerations on her face, neck, arms and hands. “She’s not awake right now and will have to go to surgery to fix her broken leg.”

“Why won’t she wake up?” he asked, and hung back, staying close to Piper, his voice thin with fright. “Tell her to wake up.”

“I can’t, darling. Sometimes after an accident, people kind of faint, from being jolted around. I think that’s what happened to her. You need to come over and talk to her a minute so she knows you’re here.”

“But she can’t hear me if she’s not awake.” Tears overflowed Alex’s eyes, and he seemed unaware of them.

Tears dampened her eyes as she spoke. “She hears you. She needs to hear your voice and know you’re with her. She’ll know. Mothers always know.” Piper looked up at the monitor. Vital signs were stable, so Caroline was probably okay to undergo surgery now. She sent up a quick prayer that Caroline could feel Alex beside her and know she was loved.

“Mom? It’s me. Alex,” he said, and his voice cracked.

“You can touch her hand.” Piper took Alex’s hand and placed it over Caroline’s, careful to avoid the IV site.

“Mom? Uncle T. took me rock climbing, and I’m in camp and everything,” he said.

The monitor showed that Caroline’s heart rate skipped a beat, then raced for a few before settling down again. “I think she hears you. Good work, Alex.”

Piper looked up at Taylor, and her breath lodged in her throat. Longing, such as she’d never seen in him, was etched on his face. She rose from her knees beside Alex. “Keep talking to her,” she whispered in his ear. She approached Taylor and placed a hand on his arm. “Taylor? Are you okay?”

Turning his attention to her, he nodded, then shook his head, then gathered her against him. Piper held his trembling body tight to her, hoping to instill some of the comfort she’d shared with Alex. It wouldn’t be enough. It was never enough, but perhaps it helped just a little.

She pulled back and touched her hand to his face. “Can I get you some coffee? Some juice for Alex?”

He nodded and released her. “I want to talk to the surgeon and see what they have planned, see if I can scrub in with him.”

“Oh, Taylor. That’s not a good idea. He probably wouldn’t let you anyway.” Piper bit her lower lip, knowing Taylor was desperate to do something, but this wasn’t it. He couldn’t sit idly by while someone else fixed his sister. Sitting on the sidelines wasn’t going to satisfy him.

“I know, dammit,” he said in a low growl. “But I have to do something. I just can’t sit here and wait.” Sitting and waiting weren’t what he did. It wasn’t his way. His way was to charge forward, take control of a situation and make it right. Frustration rocked through him, and he clenched his jaw.

“Let me get those drinks, get Alex settled a little, and we’ll talk.” She turned away from him, allowing her hand to linger on his chest for a second, needing that moment of contact with him. “Alex, come with me.” She held out her hand to the boy. “We need to go get your Uncle T. some coffee.”

Without hesitation, Alex launched himself at her, hugging her around the hips. His small body shook, and she held him tight. Then she felt the touch of Taylor’s hand on her shoulder. He knelt beside them, embracing them both. Tears clouded her eyes and pressure built in her chest. Here was the family she had longed for.

And it wasn’t hers.

With a sniff, she pulled away before she broke down in front of them. Now she had to be the strong one for both of them. “Come on, Alex.”

She led the boy away, and Taylor watched them go, feeling like a piece of him was leaving with them. Cursing, he shoved to his feet and grabbed the room phone and called the orthopod. A friend of his, Dr. Ian McSorley, was a man he could talk to. They’d climbed and base jumped together, and he trusted Ian like a brother. A curt conversation that ended the way Piper had said it would didn’t put him in any better frame of mind.

As he paced outside the trauma room, Piper returned with the drinks as promised. At least she had something to do. He reached for the cup. Taking a deep breath, he sipped the steaming brew, savoring the taste. Just the way he drank it. How had she remembered that? Taking a look at her, as if seeing her for the first time, he stared. She was a gem in so many ways, and he hadn’t seen it. He was such a bastard.

“Maybe I should have gotten you decaf,” she said, her sharp gaze assessing, wondering.

“No, this is fine. Thanks.” He pulled back. He had to or he was going to allow his emotions to overtake him and that couldn’t happen. He allowed his gaze to fall to Alex and the heat of emotion sliced right through him. The kid’s face was a little pale and his eyes were red, but both were normal under these stressful circumstances. “I talked to Ortho, and they’ll take her to the OR in a few. Ian won’t let me scrub in.” A muscle twitched in his jaw. Dammit.

“It’s really for the best.”

He ran a hand over his face and tried to shake off the anger that burned in his gut. “I’m glad her abdomen is stable. It’s her head that worries me more than anything.”

“Radiology didn’t see anything significant, so it’s probably just a concussion, and now we’re sedating her a little, too.”

She touched his arm, the gesture sympathetic, but he couldn’t respond to it right now. He couldn’t reach out or he would break. “I’m sure you’re right.”

“What’s all that stuff mean?” Alex looked up at him, his brown eyes dark and filled with questions.

Taylor looked at Piper, and she nodded. It was his place to explain. The words stuck in his throat. How was he going to explain this to Alex? The kid would likely read through anything he said. Helplessly, he appealed to Piper, needing her now more than he ever had and hating himself for it. “The words won’t come,” he said, his voice rough.

Piper looked at Alex, her gaze soft and filled with compassion for the boy. “Your mom has to have surgery on her leg to fix it, so Taylor’s friend Ian is going to do that tonight. She doesn’t have any brain damage, even though she’s still not awake. She had some X-rays of her head and everything’s okay.”

“But her eyes are shut, and she has cuts all over her and she won’t wake up.” His chest heaved with anxiety.

“I know. Right now her body is trying to heal and that takes a lot of energy, so she can’t spare the extra energy it would take to wake up just yet.” She sighed and looked at Taylor for confirmation. He looked as if he was getting his feet under him again. That was good. He was going to need to be the stable one for Alex for a lot longer than he’d anticipated. Caroline’s injuries weren’t going to heal overnight.

Piper explained the process of going to the OR, then to ICU until she woke up. Alex seemed to take it all in, but he was still a child and fears still clung to him.

“Piper?” one of the secretaries approached. “OR’s ready for bed one.”

“Thanks.” She spoke to Alex. “I’m going to get your mom ready to go to the operating room, and you can go with us up there, but just to the big doors, then other nurses will take over for us.”

“Okay.” He nodded.

Minutes later, they had Caroline ready and wheeled the stretcher down the back hallway. The neon lights overhead were too harsh, too bold, and revealed too much. Taylor saw everything with surreal vision, one color bleeding into the next. Nothing seemed real right now. Everything about him was exposed and raw in the awful lighting, leaving him stripped bare.

After handing Caroline off to the OR team, Taylor took Piper aside. “Is your shift almost over now?”

“Yes. Do you want me to stay over?” She would. For him, she would stay forever and beat herself up later for being such a marshmallow. Now he needed help. Should she tell him it was her last one? He was going to find out sooner or later.

“No.” He fished out his keys and removed one. “This is to the back door. Can you go to my house and take down the party stuff?”

“Party stuff?”

“Yeah.” He blew out a harsh breath and shoved a hand back through his hair. “We had a welcome-home party planned for Caroline. I don’t want Alex to see it.”

Oh, God. “That’s a good idea.” The key he gave her was warm from his pocket and she closed her fist over it. “I’ll do it. Do you want me to call when I’m done or what?”

“I don’t know, yeah, maybe. I’m going to want to stay here the rest of the night. I know it’s a huge imposition, but maybe you could take Alex home for me in a little while. He should go home, but he can’t go by himself. Someone needs to be with him.” Looking into Piper’s face, he knew she would do whatever he asked of her. She was loyal to a fault, and her compassion overwhelmed him right now. Unable to name the emotions filling him, he pulled her close for a quick hug and pressed a hard kiss to her temple. “Thank you.” It was as close as admitting to her and himself that he needed her once again. He needed her more than he could admit to either one of them.

Nodding, she pulled away. “I’ll be back.” She said goodbye to Alex and left them alone in the waiting room.