If you’ve reached this page, you did so by cheating. Because this page isn’t actually connected to any other pages.

Don’t you know that cheaters never win?

Except in this case.

In this case, cheaters win… immortality!

That’s right! Because you decided not to follow the rules, and go through this ebook page by page instead of skipping around like you were supposed to, the Magic Nook Fairy^* has granted you the gift of eternal life.

You are now an immortal!^**

So go out there and do all those things you always dreamed of doing. Like setting yourself on fire. Or jumping off of a high building. Or tying a big rock to your neck and dropping it into a lake.

Yes, the fun you can have with immortality is practically limitless.

So what are you waiting for? Commit suicide and test your immortality today!

^*Yes, Nook is indeed magic. It also cures cancer.^†

^**Some restrictions may apply. Immortality may include side effects such as boredom, boring other people, disgust with the lack of quality programming on television, itching, diarrhea, and instant death if you do anything stupid, like the examples noted above. Void where prohibited, and in the state of Maryland.

^†Nook doesn’t really cure cancer. But it does cure unhappiness.