THIRTY

It was a night to remember, but for more than just the great time I had with my grandfather. We did hit Coronet City and dined at the finest restaurant on all Corellia: Nova Nova. Normally reservations were comlinked in several months in advance, but my grandfather just showed up bearing a bouquet of flowers, and we were admitted to a private room. The food was all served techno—tiny portions arranged on the plate as if they were art. Sensors in the utensils relayed data to discrete holoprojectors, so one knew the exact contents of each mouthful, including hints of what subtle flavors one should expect to taste, or anecdotes concerning the creation of the dish.

Made me wonder if Siolle Tinta’s chef, Chid, was working in the kitchen.

After that we went to the private club at the pinnacle of the world’s tallest building. The Lastdark Club took its name from the fact that it was the place in the city the sun touched last before night, and from the fact that the majority of the members considered themselves the most enlightened people on the planet. Back when I worked CorSec we used to joke about the club because we knew none of us could ever afford to join; but my grandfather had become a member in the last three years, and half the plants in the place were hybrids he’d created.

The overwhelming elegance of my surroundings sharply contrasted with what I had known at the Jedi academy, making Yavin 4 seem but a distant memory. Coronet City seemed more right to me, I fit in better here. The academy’s jungle setting had always left me slightly uneasy. I realized, sitting in a plush nerf-hide chair, sipping Corellian brandy and watching the city spread out beneath me, that being city born and bred, I had a preference for urbanity and civilization. Coruscant was too built up for me to feel comfortable there all the time, but here, on Corellia, I could feel at home again.

Nice place to raise kids.

My grandfather told me stories of Booster Terrik from back before my father got him sent to Kessel, back before Jorj Car’das had eaten up Booster’s organization, only in turn to have his organization taken over by Talon Karrde. “So, you see, when Hal caught Booster that first time, Booster considered it pure luck, and forever after worked hard to taunt and elude Hal.” My grandfather smiled broadly. “I don’t think Booster ever truly appreciated your father’s skills as a detective.”

We spoke of many things that evening, even on the ride back to the estate. I discovered in my grandfather that night someone I had never known before. Of course, my first relationship with him had been established as a child to a man, which brought with it certain behaviors. By the time I moved into adulthood, I’d joined CorSec, and our relationship shifted to more of a professional one. This was not a deliberate shift but a natural one, since our jobs dominated our lives. While I could speak to him about my romantic entanglements, that again was a youth speaking to an elder. And then, when my father died, the pain we both felt battered us emotionally to the point where sharing feelings hurt too much, so we stoically didn’t touch upon subjects that would reopen old wounds.

On this night, for the first time, I was able to relate to him as just one adult to another. It was an odd feeling, yet one in which I took great pride. Here was the man who knew my father and Nejaa better than anyone. If he could like me, if he could respect what I had done, then there was a good chance they would have also. This realization quelled some of the discomfort I’d felt since my final encounter with Exar Kun, and that night I went to sleep feeling better than I had in a long time.

Master Skywalker had once said that Jedi do not dream, so when I found myself on a bright, arid world, with my lightsaber unlit but held in my right hand, I wondered at how I had gotten where I was. I saw the emerald sleeves of my Corellian Jedi tunic, and even that did not seem out of place, though the material was finer than that of the clothes I’d been given on Yavin 4. It wasn’t until I looked over to my right and saw Ylenic It’kla, resplendent in his purple cloak, and, beyond him, the Jedi General in his brown and khaki desert-born robes, that I realized I wasn’t me.

The three of us, spread out sufficiently to give ourselves room to fight, stood in a dusty bowl-shaped depression beneath a duracrete dome. A dozen three-meter-tall pillars scattered around its circumference held the dome aloft, allowing the light from the outside to illuminate the arena. Makeshift tents and storage sheds occupied a quarter of the arena in the direction we were facing. Emerging from the central pavilion, three figures came out to stand opposite us. Each of them bore a lightsaber. Their leader, the taller, blond man facing the general, took a step closer to us than his comrades. The red-haired woman aligned herself with Ylenic, while the Anzati, with his proboscises just beginning to peek from the cheek pouches that hid them, lined up to oppose me.

The general—his name eluded me though I knew I recognized something about him—spoke very precisely. “You are meddling with things you cannot control; things that nearly destroyed the Jedi millennia ago. We have come to ask you to abandon your evil and return to the light.”

The leader laughed slowly, his voice low and laden with contempt. “The weak always fear the strong growing up to replace them.”

“And the foolish always see themselves as strong.” The words came from my throat and I could feel my lips forming them. It almost even sounded like something I’d say, though more formal—more archaic and precise—than I would have liked.

Ylenic’s voice came gentle yet strong. “Fear marks the wrong path. We offer you freedom from your fear.”

Their leader thumbed his lightsaber to life. “And we offer you freedom as well.”

The Anzati, taller than me, darker, entirely humanoid save for the proboscises uncurling in his excitement, ignited his blue blade and closed with me. Nikkos Tyris—his name came easily to me—held his lightsaber in a guard I’d not seen before. He had his left hand on the hilt fairly close to the shimmering blade, but the blade itself extended out and down from the lower edge of his hand toward the ground. His right hand rode the lightsaber’s pommel. Holding the blade out away from his body, with his right hand at the level of his chin, he could waggle the blade back and forth in a triangle of coverage that would ward him well. This triangle style—the thought suddenly came to me like a long lost memory—favored a man who was quick, and would combine sweeping strikes at my legs with a flick of the wrist cut that would open me from groin to chin.

I knew fear, but the person I was in the dream shunted it away. I held my silvery blade in a simple guard, though I tilted the blade forward, pointing it at his throat. We circled, then he struck. His blade flicked out for my right leg. I swept my blade down to block low right, sparks flying as our blades crashed into each other. He bounced his blade up and over mine, and brought it across in a slash meant to decapitate me.

I caught the acrid stink as some of my hair melted beneath the lightsaber’s lethal caress, but I ducked the blow by a safe margin. Rotating my wrists, I swept my blade back low, through where his legs should have been, but he leaped up and away from my strike. He flipped backward through the air, displaying great ability with levitation, and landed easily four meters away from me.

His dark eyes blazed for a moment, then an invisible fist smashed into my chest, knocking me backward. He freed his right hand from his azure blade, and flicked fingers at me with the most casual of gestures. A fist-sized stone shot at me from the ground, clipping me on the left shoulder. Pain shot through my arm, leaving it numb. He laughed and hurled another stone toward me. I deflected it with my lightsaber and smiled, then another rock slammed into the left side of my head.

I went down hard, raising a small cloud of dust when I hit the ground. My lightsaber bounced out of my grasp and I didn’t see where it landed. I shook my head to try to clear it, but pain and a faint ringing made that difficult.

I could feel blood coating the left side of my face and swiped at it with the left sleeve of my tunic. I heard the crunch of gravel beneath his boots as Tyris approached. Drawing myself up into a crouch, I glanced to my right and finally saw my lightsaber lying there, two meters away. I wanted to call it to my hand, but I knew it would never come. I could dive for it, but his lightsaber would pin me to the ground before I ever got there.

“So, it is true, what they have said about the Halcyon line. You are wingclipped mynocks.” An evil smile spread across Tyris’s face as he brought his lightsaber around to display for me the tool of my destruction. “You are a line of weakness.”

I smiled, knowing what I had to do. “We have our strengths.”

“Do you?” He whisked the blade back around to his left, preparatory to sweeping it through me. “Better summon one swiftly.”

In the second of life he left me, I caught a vision of him standing above me and my dead comrades. Our slain bodies faded away, but his mocking laughter did not. I knew with a certainty as clear and hard as transparisteel that if I did not deal with Tyris, my friends and our mission here would be destroyed. I couldn’t let that happen, so I acted.

I launched myself toward my lightsaber, my right hand reaching for it. My body twisted in the air as I flew. I landed on my back, skidding the last centimeters to where my hand closed on the blade’s hilt. Even as I tightened my grip, even as I started to bring the blade around in a parry, I knew I would be too late.

So did Tyris.

He stabbed his blade down through my chest. The azure blade melted flesh and boiled blood as it went, reducing my heart to sweet smoke and steam. On further it stabbed, exploding arteries and burning through my spine. The lower part of my body went numb, though I barely noticed because of the wave of agony surging up through me and into my brain. It threatened to overwhelm me, letting darkness nibble into my sight. I was dying and I knew it and regrets poured in with the pain.

But I was not dead yet.

I was a Halcyon. I was a Jedi.

Jedi do not know pain.

In an instant all physical agony ceased as effectively as if I’d flicked a switch and turned all my pain receptors off. All I was left with was an incredible clarity of mind and a singleness of purpose. I’d dedicated my life to the service of others, to the service of the Force. I would not go out without my duty being fulfilled. I concentrated and employed the greatest Halcyon gift against my enemy.

I sucked the energy out of the Anzati’s lightsaber and forced myself to smile as I did so. I tasted blood in my mouth, but that fact elicited no panic. It was inconsequential. More telling was the look of surprise on Tyris’ face as his blue blade flickered once, then twice, then went out. I’d drained it of every last joule and let him read in my eyes that he should suddenly be very afraid.

With the energy I’d pulled in I plucked him from the ground in a giant invisible fist. He screamed, I think; at least his mouth worked as if he was screaming. I made the fist convulse once and I felt no resistance as his bones shattered. I let him hang limp in the air for a moment, then hurled him back through the tents to slam him against the dome and a support. I felt a jolt through the Force and saw a blue flash of light, but by then my energy reserves had faded.

As did I. I felt spiky red torments racing in to fill my consciousness, but I slipped out of my fleshy prison before they could shackle me to this spot forever.

I sat bolt upright in bed, sweat pouring off my body. I felt for the burned, crusted hole in my chest but found nothing. My head pounded, but I found no torn scalp, no bump rising from a stone, no blood. A shiver ran down my spine and I realized that I actually could feel my lower body again.

I stumbled out of bed and staggered to my room’s refresher station. I started cold water running and splashed it on my face as the station’s glowpanels brightened. I drank from my cupped hands, quenching an intense thirst, then lowered my face into the catch basin and let the water flow over the back of my head.

Finally I brought my head up. As water trickled down over my back and chest, I glanced in the mirror and saw my grandfather’s face where mine should have been. I closed my eyes and shook my head. Opening them again, amid the tear-tracks water droplets left on the mirror, I saw Nejaa Halcyon’s features fade and mine return. I reached up and touched my own face, letting my fingers confirm what my eyes saw, and that sent a shoulder-shifting shudder through me.

I turned away from the mirror and buried my face in my hands. For the past ten weeks I’d been an idiot. I could have seen it, I would have seen it, but by going to the academy I’d cut myself off from the friends who would have helped make it all clear to me.

My father’s saying—“If you cannot recognize the man in the mirror, it is time to step back and see when you stopped being yourself.”—should have been my guide all the way along. In joining Luke I wasn’t being myself, I was trying to become my grandfather. And the dream made it abundantly clear that to do that was a disaster. Corran Horn was not a Jedi.

What Corran Horn was was an investigator, trained by CorSec, to deal with all manner of problems just like the Invids. If they’d been a pirate band working the Corellian sector, I’d have infiltrated them, ferreted out their secrets, and busted them up. I’d done that very thing dozens of times in my career. Granted, no organization I faced had been that big, powerful or elusive, but size works against efficiency with criminal organizations, and power allows for greed to be played off against greed, creating discord.

I’d spent ten weeks wasting my time when I could have been out there going after Mirax’s kidnappers the best way I knew how. That sort of investigation certainly would take time—months at the very least, but at least I’d be doing something that would get me closer to Mirax. The Jedi stuff I had learned was fine for saving the galaxy, but I only wanted to save one person, and save her I could.

I turned back toward the mirror and nodded to the man I saw there. “Good to see you again, Corran Horn. It’s time this Invid business is ended once and for all.”

Star Wars: I, Jedi
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