Chapter Six

“Oh, my God, the ring is huge.”

Jenna preened, her hand thrust out in front of her, the glittering diamond on her ring finger giving off such light Morgan was afraid she’d be temporarily blinded. “I know, right? It was so unexpected. I mean, I had a suspicion he was going to ask me but I didn’t have a clue he would give me such a spectacular ring. Though he could’ve given me a ring made of tinfoil and I would’ve loved it.”

Morgan believed her. Jenna was so gone over Brett the guy could do no wrong. And he was an incredibly nice guy. Oh, and gorgeous. He had this way of looking at Jenna like she was the most beautiful woman on the entire planet. It was sweet.

A few weeks ago she would’ve rolled her eyes but now she thought it was sweet. See what finding a good man did?

“He has great taste.” Mia grabbed Jenna’s hand and admired it closely. “Did anyone help him pick it out?”

“I may have dropped a hint or two what I wanted my ring to look like.” Jenna giggled. “But nope, he did it all on his own.”

“Too good to be true, that one,” Morgan couldn’t help but add.

It had been two weeks since Jenna went on her weekend mini vacation with her boyfriend and come back an engaged woman. It had taken the three of them that long to get together for a Saturday afternoon. They were having a long lunch at one of their favorite restaurants.

“Don’t you play the cynical card, Morgan,” Mia chastised with a knowing grin. “You need to dish about your new hunky boyfriend.”

Mia didn’t work with Jenna and Morgan any longer so she hadn’t heard all the details. Not that Morgan shared many details with Jenna, for that matter. For once in her life, she was keeping things…quiet.

Private.

Savoring Evan all for herself to enjoy.

“She won’t even dish to me.” Jenna shook her head. “And I thought I was her best friend.”

“You’re too in love and planning your wedding. I didn’t want to bore you with my life.” Jenna was totally wrapped up in wedding plans. They’d set the date nine months away, and she was already in full panic mode.

“I am never too busy for you.” Jenna’s expression was serious. “Come on, spill.”

Morgan sighed. How could she explain when she really didn’t understand it herself? It was just happening so…fast. Like a raging wildfire out of control and consuming the side of a mountain and she didn’t know how to slow it down. Didn’t know if she wanted to slow it down since she was sort of enjoying the wild and bumpy ride.

She was really enjoying the wild and bumpy ride. Not only did she have fun with Evan and liked talking to him, they had a lot in common. And the sex was unbelievably good.

It was almost too perfect. And that was the part that scared her the most.

“We get along great,” Morgan started, shooting the both of them a withering glare when she saw the smirks on their faces. “He’s really sweet. He makes me feel good. The only drawback is that he’s busy. His work keeps him going constantly, and he’s never one to say no. If they ask him to work an extra shift he never hesitates. I haven’t even seen him in a couple of days.”

Though he had called her late last night and said the hottest, most arousing things she’d ever heard. The moment she got off the phone she’d well…gotten off. But her hands didn’t bring her the satisfaction Evan’s could.

Sigh. She was so gone for the man it wasn’t even funny.

“He sounds like Brett. Oh! In fact, I talked to Brett about your guy.” Jenna smiled, and Morgan’s cheeks heated with embarrassment. She didn’t want to know what he said.

Well, fine, yes she did.

“What did he say?” Mia asked eagerly.

“I had no idea about this but I guess there are quite a few EMTs and paramedics out there who have quite the lothario reputation.” Jenna shook her head and laughed. “Brett said they’re a bunch of players.”

Morgan’s heart sunk into the pit of her stomach. Great. Her potential boyfriend—she really didn’t know what to call him—was a player. Just what she wanted to hear.

“But when I mentioned his name, Brett said Evan was a pretty stand up guy. In fact, he said Evan was very serious, almost too serious. He works hard and is very good at his job, but he has a hard time letting loose.”

He didn’t have a hard time letting loose with her.

“Ah, is he all serious and no fun, Morgan?” Mia waved a hand and smiled. “I doubt that very much.”

“He’s very driven. He’s saving money to buy some land so he could build a house on it.” He’d admitted that to her a few nights ago, the last night he spent at her place, in fact. They’d been talking after a particularly delicious bout of lovemaking, and he’d admitted some of his future dreams. How he’d even found the land he wanted to buy and was saving every extra penny so he could purchase it and soon since it was such a good deal, what with the way real estate was currently priced.

He was very serious. Brett wasn’t kidding. So purposefully driven and he treated her so wonderfully.

It scared the crap out of her.

“Oh, wow, sounds ambitious. Nothing wrong with that.” Mia took a sip of her lemonade. “Maybe someday Jake could build his house.”

Jake and his father were partners in a construction company. “I can recommend him to Evan.” Morgan’s voice sounded faint, even to her own ears. Her head spun and she grabbed her water glass, taking huge gulps of it to calm her nerves.

Nope, didn’t help.

“You don’t look so good.” Jenna watched her with a careful eye. “What’s wrong?”

Morgan shook her head and pasted a smile on her face. “Nothing. I’m fine.”

“Liar.” Mia reached out and rested her hand on top of Morgan’s. “Come on, confess. We want to help you.”

Morgan exhaled loudly. “You’ll think I’m stupid.”

“Never. I was ridiculous when I first got together with Brett, remember?” Jenna shot her a pointed look.

“She was ridiculous.” Mia giggled when she got the death stare. “And I was stupid too. We all do stupid things for love.”

Love. The word was so big, so important. Amazing how four letters strung together could leave her feeling so completely out of sorts.

“He’s too perfect,” Morgan finally confessed, her voice barely above a whisper. “Like I think someday a bomb is going to drop and I’m going to find out he’s a serial killer or that he has another wife and four kids. Something bad, you know? That I’m just his piece on the side and he’s been stringing me along all this time.”

“I think Brett would know if Evan’s married, Morgan,” Jenna said.

Morgan rolled her eyes. “It’s just an example, Jenna. I just mean… I don’t know what I mean. He’s wonderful. He’s sweet, he listens and he seems to like hanging out with me. I know he works hard so he’s not around as much as I’d like but maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe he’d get sick of me.”

“He doesn’t sound like the type to get sick of you. He sounds like he really cares.” Warmth glowed in Mia’s eyes and the sight of it made Morgan’s stomach roil. She pushed her plate away from her.

That was the part that freaked her out the most. That he could care. That he could already be—gulp—in love with her. Why would he be? What did he see in her? She wasn’t that special, she never had been. No, she didn’t think so low of herself that she wasn’t worthy but come on. Men did not fall instantly in love with her. That sort of thing had never happened to her before.

“That’s the problem. I think he does care. And it’s happening too fast. I’m being completely irrational, I know but I can’t help it. I’ve been seeing him for two weeks. Fourteen days. That’s not long enough to know anything.”

Mia and Jenna exchanged knowing glances, which only frustrated Morgan more. “And don’t give me your fated, it was meant to be crap either. I don’t believe in that. I never have. Just because we have such a strong connection doesn’t mean anything. It’s just…really great sex.”

Her friends stared at her mutely which urged her on.

“Yep, that’s it. Great sex. Fantastic. The man is amazing. I lucked out in that department. So I’m just going to accept it for what it is, a really great affair and when it’s over I’ll mourn for a bit, I can’t lie about that but it will be over. It has to be. Nothing this good sticks, right? Right?”

Morgan was rambling. She knew it. Jenna and Mia watched her with identical expressions on their faces. As if they found her ridiculously amusing, which they probably did. Fine, she could be the butt of their joke. She didn’t care. At least she was having great sex with a hot guy.

She frowned. Her friends were having great sex with hot guys too. And not only were they having great sex, they were involved with really good guys. Seriously involved. Jenna was getting married. Mia was practically living with Jake, and she worked with him at the family construction company as their office manager. They both ended up with men who they met on a complete whim. Men who fell for them instantly.

Just like Evan and her.

“If you need to tell yourself that to feel better then great, but we know the truth.” Jenna smiled and shook her head. “You’re just scared. And there’s no reason to be scared. He sounds like he’s the one for you.”

“I hardly know him.”

“Sometimes you just know.”

“I’ve never believed that.”

“I think you need to become a believer,” Mia suggested.

She didn’t want to. She knew she was behaving like a spoiled brat but she couldn’t look any deeper into this. Men left her, it was a known fact. She wasn’t good at relationships. They never lasted no matter how hard she worked.

Enjoy it. Enjoy the sex. Enjoy the way he holds you and kisses you and looks at you like there is no other woman in the room even in a crowded restaurant. Savor it because it’ll be gone in a blink of an eye…

She wasn’t in a good mood. Evan knew it, could tell from the moment he walked into her apartment about an hour ago. For dinner he’d brought the sandwiches she loved so much from the deli close to the hospital, but she picked at her sandwich and barely made conversation. He’d brought her a cookie, too, the chocolate chip ones they made from scratch, but she didn’t even peek in the bag.

Damn it, she loved those cookies. He remembered the first one he gave her, how he’d licked a crumb from the corner of her lips after she finished eating it and it had turned into a two-hour sex fest.

Evan frowned and balled up the wrapper of his long gone sandwich, tossing it in the trashcan not far from where he sat. Looked like there would be no sex fest tonight. She could hardly look him in the eye.

“Something bothering you?” He followed her in the kitchen, leaning against the counter as she rewrapped her untouched sandwich and stuck it in the fridge.

“I’m not hungry.” She shrugged. “Thanks for bringing it by, though.”

He was tired after working a long ass shift. And it had been a hard one too. He’d hoped to collapse on the couch with her by his side and watch mindless TV. Maybe snooze for a little bit before she woke him up and told him in that sweet, sexy voice of hers that it was time for bed. And then he’d drag her back to bed, strip her naked and have his wicked way with her.

But the way she avoided him, how she barely spoke to him, well it spoke volumes all right. He’d done something wrong, but hell if he could figure it out.

A game player he wasn’t. He went to her and pulled her into his arms, holding her close. She snaked her arms around his waist but held them there loosely, her face pressed to his shirtfront. “What’s the matter?” He kissed her forehead softly. “Is something bothering you?”

“I don’t know.” Her voice was muffled against his chest. “I’m not sure about this.”

Wariness filled him. “Not sure about what.”

“About us.”

He waited for her to say something else, to explain herself but she remained quiet. When he couldn’t stand it any longer, he withdrew her from his arms so he could look at her. Sadness filled her eyes along with a heavy dose of confusion. “What do you mean, you’re not sure about us?”

She shrugged, her gaze cutting away from his. “It’s moving too fast and it scares me, Evan. I’m not sure I’m ready for this.”

“Ready for what?”

“This. Us. How serious it is. We’ve been seeing each other for a couple of weeks and it’s just so…so scary. Yet I don’t like to think about what life would be like without you. I’ve always been such an independent person, and I almost feel like I need you too much.”

“Right, so it’s scary to think about life without me yet you don’t want to be with me anymore? You’re not making any sense.” He felt like he was going to be sick. Was this her twisted way of trying to dump him?

“None of this makes any sense.” She started to walk away from him, but he stopped her, grabbing her upper arm so she couldn’t escape.

“What do you want?” He was almost afraid to hear her answer.

She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I don’t know what I want.”

He pulled her closer, gripped her by her shoulders and gave her a little shake. Her eyes flew open, she stared up at him and he wanted to both shake her some more and kiss her. God, she made him weak.

So damn weak.

“I’ll tell you what I want.” Bending down, he brushed his mouth against hers. Her lips clung, parted beneath his and he swiped them with his tongue. A tremor moved through him at her taste, at the possibility that this could be the last time he kissed her. He needed to convince her that they belonged together. They needed to work whatever problem she was having out.

“I want you,” he whispered against her lips before kissing her again. Her tongue met his tentatively and just like that, lit a fire deep within him. His cock twitched, his entire body came alive and he pulled her close, as close as he could get her.

But she struggled within his embrace, trying to break free and he wasn’t one to force a woman to do anything. He let her go, watched in horror as she pulled away from him as if she needed the distance.

That hurt. More than he cared to admit.

“You can’t make this better by trying to kiss all thought out of my head. I need—I need time, Evan. I need to think about things.” She turned her back to him.

“So you don’t want to see me anymore.” His chest ached, and he rubbed at it absently. Defeat deflated him like a balloon. He couldn’t take this, her rejection. It sliced through him like a machete, leaving him open and raw.

“I never said that.” Her voice was quiet with the slightest tremble to it. “I just need some space. I want to think over things. And I can’t do that with you here all the time.”

“Fine. I get it.” He sounded like a big baby but she was completely shutting him out.

Evan left the kitchen and went to the couch, grabbing the jacket that he left draped across the back of it. He shrugged it on, didn’t say a word even when she walked into the living room to watch him.

He went to the door and opened it, pausing for just a moment to see if she’d run to him. Try to stop him from leaving.

She didn’t.

Fuck.

“See you later,” he tossed over his shoulder as he walked through the door, slamming it so hard the windows rattled. He pounded down the steps, his strides long and quick as he headed toward his truck. He refused to look back, knew it would be nothing but a disappointment.

She wasn’t going to chase after him, wasn’t going to stop him from leaving. She was letting him go so she could think about things. What the hell did that even mean? It wasn’t like they spent all of their time together. She worked fulltime. He had crazy hours. When they were together it felt like a stolen moment, moments he’d always cherished.

Looked like he’d been the only one cherishing those moments. God, he was such a stupid ass.

Evan climbed into his truck and started it, pumping the gas so the engine roared in the quiet of the early evening. The sound gave him no satisfaction. Nothing did. He put the truck into reverse and unable to help himself, glanced up at the window he knew was Morgan’s bedroom.

And saw her peeking through the cracked blinds, watching him.

Pissed, he backed out of the spot and sent his tires squealing as he fled the parking lot. He’d go home, crack open a couple of beers, drown his sorrows in liquor and then crash out. He had to work early tomorrow so he’d do what he always did.

Focus on his job. It was the only thing he could count on. The only thing that gave him any source of true satisfaction. He needed to face the truth. What he’d shared with Morgan had been nothing but an illusion.

A pretty one, but an illusion nevertheless.

And that realization really fucking sucked.