COLM                  

COLM FOLDED HIS HANDS behind his head and watched the morning sun dance across his bedroom wall. The breeze from the open window tickled his chest. He reached out and laid a hand on Adele’s bare thigh. She murmured something and snuggled into his side.

The house was silent, everyone off doing Sunday chores. A good thing, because he would have hated to be stuck out in the back woods where he and Adele usually met. She deserved better than to lose her virginity rolling around in the dirt.

That’s where they’d started—in the forest. She’d found him working in the vegetable garden. He’d caught her watching, and she’d said she liked to watch him work, his shirt off, sweaty and dirty . . .

They’d gone into the forest then. He’d left his shirt off. Maybe that had helped.

She’d pushed him against a tree and wrapped herself around him, kissing him so hard he’d been hard in seconds. She hadn’t pulled back, hadn’t slowed him down like she usually did.

They’d been going into the woods for almost a year now and he could usually get his hands up her shirt, but only twice under her pants, sliding his fingers into her, so hot and wet . . . He’d spent a lot of time in the shower with those memories, but they didn’t compare to the third, just a few days ago, when he’d shot that undercover cop for her. She’d forgiven him for losing Robyn Peltier, saying they’d find her and he’d been so brave, so strong, protecting her. She’d leaned against him, nuzzling him, breasts rubbing his chest. Then unbuttoned his fly, her hand sliding inside, stroking him, tentative at first, saying she hoped she was doing it right. When he’d assured her she was, her confidence had sprung back, stroking him, her grip so firm and hard that he’d . . .

But she’d said that was okay. It proved how much he loved her, how much he wanted her.

He only hoped he hadn’t taken advantage of her. She’d been so excited, the way she’d clung to him, kissed him, the heat of her mouth, her skin, her wetness, her soft moans urging him on, whimpering if he slowed down, pressing against him, wriggling on his fingers, whispering, “We shouldn’t, Colm. You’re too young. We should wait. Oh, God, Colm, don’t stop. Please, don’t stop.”

He’d been gentle. He had been there when the men in the kumpania had coached Hugh before his wedding night, telling him it wouldn’t be easy the first time, that he might hurt Lily a little. So Colm knew he had to be careful, but Adele had been so excited that when he’d hesitated before that first thrust, she’d pulled him in, arching up to meet him, letting out only the smallest cry and if it had been pain, she seemed to have forgotten about it quickly enough. So he’d done well, and he was proud of himself. He—

The smallest sniffle stopped him midthought. Adele still lay on her side, her back pressed against him. She was quiet, asleep it seemed.

Another sniff. He scrambled up as she sat, wiping her eyes.

“You’re crying,” he said.

“No, I just—”

“Did I hurt you? Gods, Adele, if I did, I’m so sorry. I tried to be gentle—”

“You were.” She smiled through her tears. “You were perfect, Colm. It didn’t hurt at all.” The smile twisted. “Well, maybe just a little, at first, but it was worth it. That’s not why I’m crying.”

“You regret it. You wanted to wait and now—”

She took his hands and pulled him to sit beside her. “Never,” she said fiercely. “I love you. I don’t care if this isn’t right, if you’re too young. I can’t wait anymore. I love you so much. If I can’t be your wife yet, I want to be your lover. If that’s okay . . .”

“S-sure.”

She kissed him, still clasping his hands. Then she lowered her gaze and a fresh tear slid down her pale cheek. He freed one hand and wiped it away, then leaned down, trying to meet her eyes.

“What’s wrong, Adele?”

She shook her head.

“Please tell me.”

She nibbled her lower lip, then lifted reddened eyes to his. “I understand why you didn’t want to help me last night.”

“What?”

“With Robyn Peltier. I needed your help catching her, so I called and left that message—” She shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. You’re right. This is my problem.”

“I never said that. If you left a message, I didn’t get it.”

She looked away. “That’s okay, Colm. You don’t need to lie—”

“Lie?” His voice cracked as he got to his feet. “I’d never lie to you, Adele.”

She reached for him, but he sidestepped her grasp.

“That’s not fair, Adele. I’ve never lied. Not to you.”

“I’m sorry.”

He looked away, but let her catch his hand, pulling him back to her.

“I’m sorry. I just thought—” She squeezed his hand. “I wouldn’t blame you. I’ve gotten you into this mess enough already.”

“You didn’t get me into anything. I offered. You were in trouble and it wasn’t your fault. I was happy to help, and I would have been happy to help last night if I got the message.”

“Your mother must have forgotten to tell you.”

His mother took the message? That explained it then. She hadn’t forgotten, but Colm was happy to let Adele think that, and shield her from the truth—that his mother hated her. She’d been trying to discourage friendship between them for years. Then, last fall, when she’d caught them kissing behind the communal building, she’d exploded and gone to Niko. Colm had crept after her and listened.

His mother had wanted Niko to cancel Colm and Adele’s betrothal. She’d said it wasn’t right, a nineteen-year-old girl making out with a fourteen-year-old boy, and that only proved what she’d suspected for years—that there was something not quite right about Adele, something sneaky, manipulative, wrong.

Niko had laughed it off. She was just having trouble seeing her baby grow up and let another woman into his life. After that, his mother had worked on Colm directly, trying to convince him Adele couldn’t be trusted.

Colm loved his mother. His father had left the kumpania when he was two, but he’d never felt the lack. His mother had made sure of that. He knew that she was just looking out for him, but he wasn’t a child anymore and he wished she’d see that and let him lead his own life.

As angry as he was, though, he trusted his mother would come around, and he wasn’t going to say anything to turn Adele against her, so he nodded and said, “Yeah, she must have forgotten. But if you still need my help . . .”

Adele chewed her lip again, hands clasped, gaze down.

“Adele, I’m here for you. Just tell me what you need.”

She did.