But what had happened with Nathan—who was now grounded—scared the hell out of her. Drinking and hanging out at an unsupervised party at fourteen could have ended badly in ways she didn’t even want to begin to think about. Unfortunately, all she’d done for the past three days was think about all the possibilities. And she had heard from Nathan’s coach, who’d been apprised of the party, though he hadn’t said by whom. He intended to have a long talk with Tim about it, and there would be sanctions. She almost felt sorry for Tim because she was certain Tim’s parents were going to be livid when they found out the entire football team—plus girls—had been over at their house drinking.

And none of what had happened had been Mick’s fault. In fact, she was grateful he’d been the one to step in and pluck Nathan out of that situation. Had she been the one to walk into that house, she’d have likely flipped out and embarrassed her son. From what Nathan told her—as much as he could remember—Mick had been calm and had taken Nathan out of there without a scene. Tara would have most definitely caused a scene. She was certain shrieking would have been involved. And she’d have probably called the parents of every kid there, which would have mortified Nathan, who probably would have never spoken to her again. She was so glad Mick had been there and acted rationally on Nathan’s behalf.

But had she thanked him profusely? No. She’d basically blamed him for it. Not directly, of course, but indirectly she’d pointed the finger at Mick for all her failings as a mother.

God. She let her head rest against her arms and just shut it all out for a few minutes.

“Thinking of ending it all?”

Her head shot up, and she gaped at Maggie, who leaned in the doorway to her office. “Pondering it, especially if you’re bringing me some new catastrophe. I’m full up at the moment.”

“No crisis to report, but Jenna called while you were on the phone earlier, and she has final RSVPs for the anniversary party so I have your head count, plus she wanted to go over place settings and something about the caterer.”

Oh, hell. The anniversary party for Mick’s parents was coming up this weekend. And Nathan’s birthday was this weekend, too. She laid her head in her hands and closed her eyes, wishing she could be anywhere but here.

Maggie shut the door. “Want to tell me what’s wrong?”

“Everything.”

“I’ve got time. Shoot.”

Tara laid it all out for Maggie, skipping nothing. She told her about Nathan getting drunk and Mick picking him up, and Tara not being there because Tara was off counseling Maggie, even though Maggie would probably feel guilty about that. But she and Maggie were best friends, and Maggie would understand it had nothing to do with her.

“So this is all Mick’s fault.”

Tara leaned forward and folded her hands together. “Of course it isn’t his fault.”

“Seems to me you’re blaming him for everything from Nathan getting drunk to you feeling like you’re not quite perfect at the job of superwoman.”

That one hurt. “Screw you, Maggie.”

“No, thanks. I like men. Look, Tara, wasn’t it you who just a few short days ago told me I can’t save my brother? That I need to let him fall on his face and I’m only enabling him by bailing his ass out every time he fucks up?”

“Yes. I did tell you that, because it’s the truth.”

“Well, it hurt me when you told me that. But you were right. And now I’m going to hurt you by telling you that you’re trying to be everything to everybody, and in the end you have to realize you can’t. It’s okay to have an awesome career you love and be a mom at the same time. It’s okay to try to date at the same time you’re juggling said career and said kid, and it’s okay to not do any of it perfectly. You’re going to screw it all up now and then. You have to give yourself a break.”

“Easier said than done. What happened with Nathan scared me.”

“Because he got drunk? Please. Kids do that. They screw up. So did I at that age. So did you.”

“I know. God, don’t I know. I don’t want him to make the same mistakes I did.”

“But you can’t follow behind him every step he takes to try to prevent it from happening, either. You’ll smother him if you try. Let him fall a few times and see what happens.”

She inhaled and let it out on a shaky sigh. “I’ll try. No guarantees.”

“And in the meantime, go apologize to your hunky boyfriend for blaming him because your idiot son got drunk.”

She laughed. “Yeah, I think you’re right about that one. I hurt him.”

Maggie nodded. “Okay, so kiss the boo-boo and make it better.”

So she’d made the trip with Mick, who was surprisingly still speaking to her, though things between them were strained and she hadn’t had a moment alone with him to talk to him about it. She’d had to work nonstop before they left Friday, and then of course Nathan was with them. And even Nathan was having a hard time making conversation with Mick, no doubt because he was highly embarrassed about the prior weekend, which he rightly should be. He’d apologized to Mick for the drunken episode, and thankfully Mick hadn’t brushed it aside or said it was no big deal. He’d accepted Nathan’s apology but said nothing further.

So they’d sat on the airplane together and talked about ... nothing. Fortunately, Mick had picked up the slack and talked to Nathan about his practice with the team the past couple days, working out with his trainer, meeting with his nutritionist, and the two of them had talked about a couple other guys on the team. He’d kept the conversation flowing, and Tara had opened her laptop and worked so she wouldn’t have to say much other than interject a few “Oh, that’s interestings” and “Reallys” and “That’s greats.” It had been uncomfortable, and she’d actually been glad when they arrived at Mick’s parents’ house.

“Tara, I’m so happy to see you again.” Kathleen had folded her into a hug.

“I’m happy to be here.” That much was true. She liked Mick’s mother, and wished she could talk to her about the tension between her and Mick, but that would be kind of difficult.

Kathleen had hugged Nathan, too, who didn’t seem to mind it at all. He’d even managed a huge smile when Jimmy rounded the corner from the other room and enveloped Nathan in a bear hug.

“Missed you, kid. No one to shoot hoops with.”

“No one to kick your butt, you mean?”

“Nathan,” Tara admonished.

“Hey, he just thinks he’s that good,” Jimmy said, slinging his arm around Nathan’s shoulders. “But, like Mick and Gavin and Jenna, they soon learn they’re outmatched by the master.”

“In your dreams, old man,” Mick said, hugging his father.

“Well, we’ll see about that, won’t we?”

The luggage soon forgotten in the entry, Jimmy, Nathan, and Mick had taken off for the back, where the bouncing of a basketball and shouts and insults could be heard.

“It’s always like this, I’m afraid,” Kathleen said from the kitchen as she fixed Tara a glass of iced tea. “Jimmy eggs them on, and none of the kids could ever resist the challenge.”

Tara laughed. “I’m sure it’s how your children became so good at competitive sports.”

Kathleen nodded. “The Rileys do have that competitive spirit, for sure. But Jimmy uses it to keep himself fit. Most nights he drags me out there for a game or two.”

Tara laid her hand over Kathleen’s. “That’s how you stay so fit.”

She laughed. “We don’t sit on our butts around here, that’s for sure. And neither do you, by the looks of you, girl.”

“I stay busy.”

“And speaking of staying busy, thank you for planning this party. Jimmy and I are so honored.”

“I’m the one who’s honored to be a part of it.”

“Nonsense. You’re practically family.”

Tara laughed and cupped her hands around the cool glass. “Hardly.”

Kathleen studied her. “So you’re saying you have no feelings for Mick?”

Oh, crap. How was she going to get around this one? “I have a lot of feelings for Mick. I just don’t exactly know what we have together yet.”

“Well, I can tell you he has never brought a woman home to meet the family, so whatever it is he feels for you, it’s pretty special.”

“Thank you. But I don’t think it’s anything permanent or long-lasting, Kathleen. I mean, we lead two very different lives.”

“And what does that have to do with how you feel about each other?”

“It can make it difficult to make a relationship work.”

“Why? Because he’s a football player and is on the road during the season? Do you think you’d be any different than any of the other players who have relationships with their girlfriends or wives?”

“No. That’s not what I meant.” She was handling this badly. “But I have Nathan, and he needs some stability in his life. I’ve worked very hard to create that for him.”

“So you’re saying Mick couldn’t give that to him?”

Oh, God. Where had this gone all wrong? “I don’t know what I’m saying. There’s nothing wrong with Mick. Nothing at all. He’s wonderful, Kathleen. Any woman would be lucky to have him.”

Kathleen leaned back in her chair. “But not you.”

“I didn’t say that.”

Kathleen breathed out a sigh. “And I’m being defensive about Mick, which made you defensive. I’m sorry.”

“I am, too.”

“We’re both mothers, so you understand what it’s like to protect your children.”

Tara nodded. “I do.”

“I don’t want anyone to hurt him. And I know you care about him.”

“I do care about him, Kathleen. But give us time to figure out what we are to each other. This is still new.”

Kathleen laughed. “I push, I know. I want him to be happy. I want him to have what Jimmy and I have together. And I like you. I like you and Nathan. I like the two of you with Mick, so I can’t help but want to push for a family.” She stood and put her glass in the sink. “It’s time for me to butt out and let you and Mick figure things out for yourselves.”

Tara lifted her gaze to Kathleen. “Thank you.”

Kathleen came around behind her and hugged her. “But you know, I’m ready for a daughter-in-law. And I can’t think of anyone I’d rather have in my son’s life than you.”

She straightened and headed for the back door. “Now I think I’ll see if those boys have killed each other yet.”

After Kathleen left, Tara had to blink away the sting of tears. How long had she craved a mother in her life? God knows her own mother had never been the kind of parent Tara had needed. She’d longed for someone whose counsel she could seek, and she’d never had that, not even when she was a child. She’d learned to rely on her own instincts, and often she’d made the wrong choices.

Kathleen was warm and kindhearted but also a straight shooter who told it like it was. She was exactly the type of woman Tara wanted and needed in her life. She’d love to be her daughter-in-law. Or her daughter. Or her friend.

But not at the sacrifice of Nathan’s well-being. She wasn’t about to rush headlong into something that would endanger the family she had now, which was her and Nathan. She’d sacrificed so much for him. If she had to give up more, she’d do it. If she and Mick were meant to be together, it would happen.

As she saw it right now, though, there were a lot of insurmountable obstacles to that happening. Like the fact that they hadn’t even talked about how they felt about each other.

It was still too soon. She and Mick were walking on eggshells around each other right now, mostly due to her own idiocy and blindness.

So yeah, Tara could love Kathleen all she wanted, but that’s not who her primary relationship was with. Maybe it was time to figure out if there was any substance to her relationship with Mick beyond just the sex. She was beginning to wonder if that’s all they had. And if it was—yeah, it was pretty damn great sex, but it wasn’t enough for her. There was way too much at stake to invest her heart, and Nathan’s, in something that would end up burning itself out in the end.

“Hey, Mom.”

She wrapped her arm around her son. “Hey, yourself, birthday boy. How does it feel to be fifteen?”

He grinned. “Pretty good.”

She still felt a little guilty that she was working on his birthday. “I’m sorry I didn’t have the chance to give you a party or anything. And you didn’t get to be with your friends on your birthday.”

“Are you kidding? I got to go to the game today, and Gavin got me a ball signed by every member of the team, plus Mick took me down right after the game to hang out with the guys in the locker room. And they won. Best birthday present ever.”

She leaned against him. “I’m glad. I was worried.”

He shoved into her. “You worry too much.”

“Probably.”

“I’m going to find my friends. See you later?”

She nodded, realizing how easy he was to please, and how lucky she was to have a son like him. “Later.”

She watched him walk away, realizing how fast he was growing up. Time was so fleeting. Nathan sat at a table with Mick’s cousins, his laughter ringing out and so easily discernible even over this noisy crowd. God, she loved her son so much.

“It’s beautiful, Tara. Breathtaking. Thank you.” Kathleen came up to her and hugged her, her eyes filled with tears.

“You did good, girlie,” Jimmy said, grabbing her into a bear hug. “You made Kathleen cry happy tears.”

Tara laughed. “Jenna helped me out with photos of your wedding. You were such a beautiful bride, Kathleen. And you look just as lovely today.”

Kathleen’s cheeks turned pink. “Now don’t be silly. I’m a little older.”

“But still as sexy as the day I married you,” Jimmy said, sweeping Kathleen up in his arms and planting one hot kiss on his wife.

Tara made a discreet exit as Jimmy took his wife out onto the dance floor. The band struck up and started playing some rocking seventies music, which got most of the crowd boogying their way onto the dance floor.

Tara made her way over to the bar where she naturally found Jenna, who seemed out of sorts standing on the other side of it. But Kathleen had insisted her daughter not work tonight and instead enjoy the festivities.

“Don’t know what to do with yourself?”

“No. And she made me wear a damn dress.”

“You look incredible. The dress is beautiful on you.” A summery silk dress that fit Jenna’s slender body so well, it was a multiple print halter that showed off some of Jenna’s tattoos. She’d even worn heels.

Jenna wrinkled her nose. “I suppose it’s okay to dress like a girl now and then. Hard to fend off my idiot brothers if they want to play tackle football though.”

“I doubt they’ll do that tonight. I think you’re safe.”

She laughed. “You’re probably right.”

“And you might want to dance.”

Jenna shrugged. “Doubtful. I’d rather be flipping the tops off beers.”

“So no guy has caught your eye?”

“I get my fill of these moronic, beer-swilling jocks at the bar. Don’t need to dance with any of the brainless twits.”

Tara could tell Jenna had no love for any of Mick’s or Gavin’s friends.

“Anyway,” Jenna said, lifting her glass of wine to Tara. “Success. You did it.”

Tara nodded. “It looks that way. And you did a lot of the work, too.”

Jenna waved her hand in a dismissive gesture. “I did nothing but toss you the guest list, some pictures, and suggest a few spots that could hold this crazy crowd.” Jenna turned to her. “You’re really good at this.”

Tara laughed. “Thanks, Jenna. I do love my job.”

“Maybe there’s hope for my brother yet. I was beginning to wonder, since all he ever dates are bimbos.”

“I think those were mostly public relations setups.”

Jenna took a sip of her wine. “Uh-huh. That what he told you?”

Tara turned to her. “Yes.”

“Well,” Jenna said with a wry grin. “Okay then.”

Tara pondered Jenna’s comments after Jenna had slipped away to talk to her mother, wondering what she’d meant by them. Had Mick’s relationships with some of the women he’d been photographed with been more than just photo ops and public relations stunts?

She knew he had a reputation as a bad boy lady-killer, but assumed that was all PR, too.

Maybe not.

“Nice party. You do good work.”

Elizabeth Darnell. The perfect person to ask that question of, since she was Mick’s agent, but no way could she, or would she, ask.

“Thank you. You look beautiful. Not working tonight?”

Elizabeth arched a perfect brow. “Now why would you ask that?”

“You’re in a dress, not a suit.”

Elizabeth laughed. “I’m always working, honey, no matter what I wear. I just have to dress to suit the occasion.”

And Elizabeth was dressed impeccably in a tightly fitting black strapless cocktail dress that wrapped around her incredible body, and designer shoes with shiny crystals across the straps that called attention to Elizabeth’s perfectly manicured toes and exceptional legs. “So you’re meeting clients, then?”

“Mick and Gavin are my clients, as well as a couple other men in attendance here.”

“Gavin isn’t really just a client for you, though, is he?”

Tara read the shock in Elizabeth’s eyes, but she masked it right away. “I don’t know what you’re implying.”

“Oh, I saw the way you looked at him at his birthday party. You have a thing for him.”

“Gavin is my client. I treat all my clients like they’re special.”

“I’m sure you do. But the way you look at Gavin is different.”

“I don’t look at him any special way. What are you talking about?”

Her normally cool demeanor was ruffled, Tara could tell. She was wondering what it would take to knock some of the ice chips from Liz’s heart. Maybe she wasn’t as cold as Tara thought.

Tara shrugged. “I’m a woman. I see things.”

Elizabeth crossed her arms. “What things?”

“The warmth in your eyes when you look at him. A certain yearning. It’s not there when you look at other men.”

Now there was fear in her eyes. If Tara didn’t think Elizabeth was a giant pain in the ass, she’d almost feel sorry for her.

Almost.

“You’re imagining things, Tara. Gavin is a great client who makes me a ton of money. You know what you see in my eyes when I look at him? Dollar signs. I do whatever it takes to make my players happy.”

“I see. So really, nothing is ever downtime for you, is it?”

“There’s always work to be done.” Elizabeth slipped her arm in Tara’s and led her toward the back of the ballroom. “And speaking of work, let’s talk about Mick.”

This should be interesting.

Elizabeth led her out the door and into the garden. The night was warm, but fortunately not hellishly so. Elizabeth walked over toward the fountain where a string of lights highlighted her red hair, which was expertly pulled up in what Tara decided had to be her trademark French twist. Pieces had been pulled down to frame her face. Elizabeth turned to Tara and smiled, but it was a calculating smile.

“Okay, Elizabeth, you got me out here. What about Mick?”

“I like Mick’s off time to be put to good use.”

“Which means what, exactly?”

“Charitable foundations, public events, premieres, galleries, anything where he can be seen and photographed. It’s good for his image and for the team.”

“And you think his relationship with me is getting in the way of that.”

“I’m glad you see things my way.”

“I’m not saying I agree with you, Elizabeth. I’m just saying I understand your meaning. I’m certain Mick can choose to do whatever he wants.”

Elizabeth didn’t frown, but Tara saw the flash of anger in her eyes. “Look, Tara. I’m sure he’s having a wonderful time with you and your son, but the appeal is going to wear off eventually, and he’ll move on. He’ll miss the glamour, the parties, the fun and excitement that he’s used to.”

Tara shrugged, refusing to let Elizabeth get to her. “And if he does, then I guess he will move on. That’s his choice to make when and if that happens. Or rather, it’s our choice to make as far as our relationship. Or do you expect me to kick him to the curb now in order to spare myself the heartbreak later?”

“He’ll leave you eventually.”

Tara refused to rub the ache in her stomach where Elizabeth’s words had created a hole. “So you say. And maybe he won’t. Maybe I can offer him something he can’t get anywhere else.”

Elizabeth laughed. “Tara, you don’t have enough to hold him, and he’s way too much of a playboy to settle down. You carry too much baggage and he can’t handle it. It’s only a matter of time. You should get out now before he hurts you. You have your son to think about, after all.”

What a bitch. No wonder she was so good at her job. She knew right where to stick the knife. “I think my relationship with Mick is none of your business.”

Now her eyes narrowed. “You don’t want me to make it my business.”

“You already have. Butt out.”

Elizabeth opened her mouth to speak, then shut it, the anger leaving her expression and a bright smile replacing it. Tara could guess why.

“Hey, there you are. I’ve been hunting you down and couldn’t figure out where the hell you’d disappeared to.”

Tara turned, already figuring out Mick had showed up. “Hi, there.”

He cast a worried gaze between her and Elizabeth. “What are you and Liz doing out here?”

Elizabeth strolled past, a plastic smile on her face. She patted Mick’s arm. “Girl talk, sweetie. I was complimenting Tara on what a wonderful job she did on your parents’ anniversary party.”

Mick relaxed his shoulders and cast a warm gaze at Tara. “She’s wonderful, isn’t she?”

Elizabeth kissed Mick on the cheek. “A peach.” She winked at Tara as she walked through he door. “We’ll talk again later, Tara.”

Mick’s gaze followed Liz, then he turned back to Tara. “What was that all about?”

Tara didn’t need Mick to intervene on her behalf, and the last thing she wanted was to cause friction between him and his agent. Elizabeth didn’t like her. So what? Tara could handle it. And if Elizabeth was right about Mick, then there was nothing she could do about it, was there? “Just chatting about the party and football. And you, of course.”

“Was she giving you a hard time?”

“Nothing I can’t handle. So, are you having fun?”

“No.”

Tara frowned. “Why not?”

“Because I couldn’t find you. Where’ve you been?”

“I’m the event planner, remember? Trying to make sure everything’s in place, and seeing that everyone is having a good time.”

His lips lifted. “My parents are having a good time, which is all that matters. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

Silence stretched between them, and she hated it. “Mick ...”

He took her hands in his. “Let’s sit down.”

“Okay.”

He led her to the stone bench near the fountain, then sat next to her. She half turned to face him.

“Tell me what’s bothering you, Tara.”

“Nothing’s bothering me, other than me needing to apologize to you.”

He cocked his head to the side. “For what?”

“For blaming my failures—and Nathan’s—on you. I was a mess the other day when Nathan got drunk. I wasn’t there when it happened, and for some reason I felt I should have been.”

He rubbed her hand with the pad of his thumb. “So now you’re supposed to be psychic?”

She sighed. “I don’t know. This parenting thing is hard. And doing it by myself all these years has been even harder. Sometimes I fail. A lot of times I fail.”

“Guess what? Even two-parent families fail. No one’s perfect at raising kids.”

She took a glance through the doors at Mick’s parents, gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes as they slow danced. “Some manage to get it right without screwing up.”

“You think my parents raised perfect kids?” He tilted his head back and laughed, then got serious again. “I think there are a few things you need to know about me, Tara. I’m not perfect. Never have been and never will be. I made mistakes when I was young. I messed up. Bad.”

She crossed her arms. “I find that hard to believe. Look where you are now.”

“Right. But you only see the finished product. You don’t see what it took to get me here.” He looked around. “There’s something I need to talk to you about, but not here. Later, when we get back to the house. It’s important, and it has to do with your idea of perfection. And Nathan, too.”

She cast him a questioning look. “I don’t understand.”

“I know you don’t, but I don’t want to talk about it here where there are so many people. Can we table this conversation for later?”

“Sure.”

He lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “Let’s go inside and dance. Show me your disco moves.”

She let out a soft laugh. “Oh, Lord. I might need some dance lessons from your mother before I attempt the hustle.”

He slid her hand in the crook of his arm. “Don’t worry, baby. I’ll teach you everything you need to know.”