today. What kind of life is this,
that I live only to take the lives of others? I don’t want to
believe I could
have changed so much. I want to believe that somewhere beneath all this anger there is still the Dodge Anders you used to tease for his love of guardsmen and Milliners, and who felt absolutely giddy to have your attentions—you, heiress to a queendom and keeper of my heart. Tears were trickling down her cheeks. Alyss folded the letters and returned them to their packet. Queens aren’t supposed to cry as often as I do, especially warrior queens, but how can I— “Alyss.”
She shot a glance at the looking glass on the wall behind her: nothing but the expected reflections. Nothing but the usual reflections too in the looking glass above the water basin. “You must be mistaken,” a male voice said. “I don’t see her.” “I’m not mistaken. She’s here.”
The voices—her parents’ voices—seemed to be coming from a compact lying open on a side table. “Once children have grown,” Nolan mused, “they want as little to do with their parents as possible. Woe are we whose only daughter finds us an embarrassing spectacle.” Alyss approached the side table and saw her mother’s face occupying the whole of the compact’s palm-sized mirror. “I don’t think you’re an embarrassing spectacle,” she said. Nolan thrust his face into view. “Alyss!” “Father. I miss you both every day. I’ve been staring at my own reflection for so long, hoping to see you, that I’m beginning to hate the way I look.” “Impossible!” Nolan exclaimed. “You’re beautiful. And I understand that a dashing guardsman thinks the same.”
Alyss glanced at her skirts, bashful.
“You look tired,” Genevieve said.
“I’m fine.”
“Even in times of crisis, you must rest. And you’ve been crying.” “I’m fine, mother.”
Nolan was squeezed out of view. Genevieve’s face again filled the compact’s glass, her voice tender. “Alyss, I am sorry you’ve had these tremendous responsibilities thrust upon you.” “It’s not your fault, mother. You were murdered.” “But perhaps I should have been better fortified against Redd’s coming. There are moments when I wish you’d been born with no extraordinary ability, into an average Wonderland family. It’s a weakness in me, I know. To wish for a past that can never be. What would have become of Wonderland if you were not who you are?”
“I have more weaknesses than you know, mother. Lately, I’ve been thinking that my sacrifices—all of our sacrifices—haven’t been worth it.”
have changed so much. I want to believe that somewhere beneath all this anger there is still the Dodge Anders you used to tease for his love of guardsmen and Milliners, and who felt absolutely giddy to have your attentions—you, heiress to a queendom and keeper of my heart. Tears were trickling down her cheeks. Alyss folded the letters and returned them to their packet. Queens aren’t supposed to cry as often as I do, especially warrior queens, but how can I— “Alyss.”
She shot a glance at the looking glass on the wall behind her: nothing but the expected reflections. Nothing but the usual reflections too in the looking glass above the water basin. “You must be mistaken,” a male voice said. “I don’t see her.” “I’m not mistaken. She’s here.”
The voices—her parents’ voices—seemed to be coming from a compact lying open on a side table. “Once children have grown,” Nolan mused, “they want as little to do with their parents as possible. Woe are we whose only daughter finds us an embarrassing spectacle.” Alyss approached the side table and saw her mother’s face occupying the whole of the compact’s palm-sized mirror. “I don’t think you’re an embarrassing spectacle,” she said. Nolan thrust his face into view. “Alyss!” “Father. I miss you both every day. I’ve been staring at my own reflection for so long, hoping to see you, that I’m beginning to hate the way I look.” “Impossible!” Nolan exclaimed. “You’re beautiful. And I understand that a dashing guardsman thinks the same.”
Alyss glanced at her skirts, bashful.
“You look tired,” Genevieve said.
“I’m fine.”
“Even in times of crisis, you must rest. And you’ve been crying.” “I’m fine, mother.”
Nolan was squeezed out of view. Genevieve’s face again filled the compact’s glass, her voice tender. “Alyss, I am sorry you’ve had these tremendous responsibilities thrust upon you.” “It’s not your fault, mother. You were murdered.” “But perhaps I should have been better fortified against Redd’s coming. There are moments when I wish you’d been born with no extraordinary ability, into an average Wonderland family. It’s a weakness in me, I know. To wish for a past that can never be. What would have become of Wonderland if you were not who you are?”
“I have more weaknesses than you know, mother. Lately, I’ve been thinking that my sacrifices—all of our sacrifices—haven’t been worth it.”