Chapter Eight
Shane made it to the freeway interchange before he had to stop and take stock of what the hell he was doing.
The snowmobile he’d found needed a tune-up, and the engine idled roughly as he sat, staring at the collapsed ruins of what had once been Interstate 80. A trail of sorts had been carved through the countryside, parallel to the broken roads, infinitely more practical now that the earth lay frozen beneath them.
Retracing his path had brought him back here, to the crossroads. The makeshift road to the left would take him closer to his house. Straight ahead would lead him back east, where the settlements were well populated and structured more like the cities of days past. And if he turned right, he could head south, toward the borderland that edged the freeze line.
His left hand trembled on the grip.
He could do it now, turn the snowmobile and travel down toward the border. He had a house and plenty of things waiting for him back in Hamilton, but why? Why hadn’t the people in the settlement already run him out, or worse?
Because he’d pretended to be one of them. He lived above the freeze line, where the beast inside him would sleep, and he passed as human, living and working and avoiding the townspeople as much as possible. He’d tried so damn hard after the attack that had claimed Cilla’s life, promised himself he wouldn’t lose that last link to her.
All that effort and loneliness and where had it left him? Aching, because he’d lost Nadia too. In giving in to his fear and locking the wolf away inside him, he’d stranded himself firmly between two worlds. He knew less than nothing about that part of himself—and it was part of him, whether he liked it or not—and now he had to pay the price for that ignorance.
He couldn’t go home, because it wasn’t his home. He existed there, but he had no friends, nobody who loved him. They’d notice he was gone, wonder what happened, but no one would mourn him. They couldn’t, because no one knew him.
Maybe he just needed to head for the border, embrace the beast and hope Nadia was right, that being a werewolf didn’t make him a monster any more than being a man had made him one. If he stayed far enough north, the magic would be a trickle instead of a deluge. It could work.
Too late to salvage the mess he’d made of his time with Nadia, of course. Hurting her was the last thing he’d intended, but it had happened anyway, despite his best intentions.
“The road to hell’s paved with those, Sullivan.” One of his grandfather’s favorite sayings, and it had never been truer than it was now.
He revved the engine. He wasn’t going back to Hamilton. If his life there was worth fighting for, he wouldn’t have been so damn ready to leave it behind in the first place. And yet he’d abandoned everything, dropped it because—
Because Nadia needed him. She would make it to the freeze line, be healthy and safe and maybe even happy, so at least he had that. That made the trip worth it all.
He pointed the snowmobile toward the southern path but stopped as the skin on the back of his neck prickled with awareness. It took him a moment, but he managed to pinpoint the source of his uneasiness—a scent on the frigid breeze. He inhaled deeply, ignoring the way the cold air burned his nose and chest, but the pain intensified, splintered when he recognized the scent.
Wolves—a suspicion confirmed when the howling began.
He sent snow spinning behind him in a powdery arc as he turned the snowmobile around. It could be a normal wolf pack, unconcerned with a witch traveling on her own, but he couldn’t rely on that, especially after the magic she’d freed the night before. If it had affected him so viciously, what could it have done to others in the area?
The vehicle was a utility model that ate up the miles quickly, but not quickly enough to calm the pounding of Shane’s heart. He was going to be too late, he never should have left and Nadia was going to be hurt because of him—
He cursed and gunned the engine wide-open, riding harder. Anything to get to her faster.
***
The wolf pack wasn’t hard to find; their attack wasn’t subtle, and neither was Nadia’s.
He found her at the top of a small rise. Flames rose behind her, consuming a stand of trees and reaching angrily toward the sky. The wolves ranged in front of her, circling and charging, but dodging the fire that reached for them if they ventured too close.
The snow had melted for two hundred yards in every direction. Nadia wore no coat, no mittens, no hat. She was gripping the hunting knives he’d left with her, and they looked like a part of her as she flowed through the battle.
Her skin and clothes were smeared with the blood of the fallen wolves, and she probably could have taken down the rest of them too, tired as she looked.
She wouldn’t have to.
Shane didn’t bother with guns or knives. There was no time for that, not when the wolf inside him howled to fight, protect. He tore at his clothes, reached for that carefully banked fire and set it free, let it blaze through him.
Nadia might not have noticed him yet, but the other werewolves had. He had no sooner hit the ground on four paws than a member of the pack broke off and snarled, lunging at him.
He’d only fought once before as a wolf—when he’d fought back against his and Cilla’s attackers and killed them all in a blind rage. After that, he hadn’t spent more than a few terrifying minutes in this form, and he expected to struggle, stumble. Instead he met the attack with the solid mass of his shoulder, a twist and a vicious bite. Instinct, as potent as if he’d always lived this way.
The wolf howled, and one of its packmates charged to the rescue. At the top of the hill Nadia slammed a knife into a wolf’s side before lifting her head, her gaze coming straight to him. “Shane.”
Strange, that he could think so clearly when he never had before. The world was crystal, and he and Nadia were at the center of it.
Shane rebuffed the second wolf’s attack with a sharp bite to one front leg. It went down, floundering on the wet ground, and he bit down again, this time around its throat.
Blood gushed. The first wolf returned, slamming into Shane’s side and sending him tumbling. Teeth closed over his leg, but he twisted, thrashing hard enough to pull his leg from between those razor-sharp teeth before they clamped down.
Power filled him, intoxicating. Freeing. He wasn’t a monster, a mindless beast. He was a warrior too.
Then Nadia was there, bloody and beautiful. The two remaining werewolves fell back, and Nadia sank to one knee and plunged a knife into the earth. Her voice rose. No quiet whispers, but a melodic chant, and power ripped through him in its rush to gather above her hand in a golden ball of deadly fire.
She whipped her hand forward, and the magic crashed toward the wolves. One took the hit solidly, flying off its feet with a broken howl of pain.
The other spun and leaped at Nadia. Shane met it midair, a collision of bone and muscle and fur that should have hurt but didn’t. The wolf snapped at Shane but retreated when Shane raked his claws across its muzzle.
A yelp met his attack, but his final opponent was fast. It twisted when they hit the ground and lunged, digging sharp teeth into Shane’s shoulder.
Fast but smaller. Shane pressed through the pain, ignored the tearing and burning in his muscles as he forced the wolf to the ground, its head extended.
Throat exposed.
One final lunge and Shane snapped his jaws with a growl, holding on as the wolf thrashed and struggled.
Not so long. The body beneath his went still, and boots scraped the earth behind him. “It’s over, Shane.”
For one terrifying moment, he thought he might not be able to let go. Then he relaxed, stumbled back onto the slushy earth and bumped into her leg.
Nadia wrapped her arms around him, burying her face against the back of his neck. “You’re bleeding,” she whispered, and the words sounded choked. Her fingers slid through his fur, a cautious touch. “You’re hurt.”
“Not bad. I’m fine.” He thought it as though he was saying it, and it hit him that he knew she would hear.
If she found it unusual, it didn’t show. She lifted her head and smiled at him. “You’re beautiful.”
“I’m thinking.” Nonsensical words. “My clothes.”
She left him with obvious reluctance but returned a moment later with his jeans and sweatshirt. “They’re muddy, and you’re wounded. You could stay a wolf. I can drive you back to the research station…”
He shifted as her words trailed off, though he wasn’t quite sure how he did it. “I’m fine.” A violent shiver took him, and he reached for her. “Are you okay?”
Her arms came around him as she whispered something that eased the biting chill from the air. “The fire isn’t making it warm enough for you to stand here naked, Shane. You’ll become ill.”
Not with the earth alive beneath him, guiding him. “In a minute, Nadia. Just look at me.”
At last she fell silent. Her chin came up, and she met his gaze. Blood smeared her cheek and her forehead.
He cupped her face tenderly. “I shouldn’t have left.”
“You didn’t.” The words were a whisper. Nervous and unsure. “I did. Violence is in my blood. You don’t need more of it in your life.”
“Neither do you, but we both need something else.” He shivered again and grasped his clothes. “You were right. Let’s go back to the station.”
“Shane—” Nadia caught his wrist. Her other hand curled around his neck, and she rocked onto her toes and kissed him.
He wanted to drop to the ground with her underneath him, to celebrate victory and life in the most immediate, primal way possible. He settled for taking her mouth, delving deep and relishing the way she leaned into him, clutched him with shaking hands.
She pulled away too soon, almost panting for breath. “Clothes,” she whispered, her gaze dipping down his body. The blush in her cheeks deepened, and she spun away. “I have to calm the fire. Then we can go.”
And he would only distract her. “I’ll wait in the truck.” He shivered into his clothes and made his way to the truck, where he climbed into the passenger seat. He trembled with fading adrenaline and shock, and he had to bring both under control before they became a danger.
Only a few minutes passed before she joined him, fumbling with the truck’s keys before she managed to start the engine. Air blasted from the vents and quickly turned warm as she twisted onto her knees on the bench seat. “I need to use my stabilizing spell. It will be more effective if you don’t fight it. If you trust me.”
“I’m all right,” he lied.
“Shane.” Tension filled her voice. “Don’t lie to me. If you don’t trust me, be man enough to admit it. But don’t—”
“I trust you,” he cut in, his teeth chattering. “No more energy, Nadia, not on me. You had to fight. You should rest.”
“Shh.” Her fingers cupped his face, gentle and soothing. She kissed his forehead, then began to whisper vaguely familiar sounds, the words she’d chanted over him the night he’d been injured.
Energy washed over him, through him, in a warm flood that sapped his pain and stilled his shaking. It felt calming, strong, like Nadia herself. “Thank you.”
“Hush. Save your strength.” She eased back and smiled at him. “Let me take care of you.”
“I’m okay.” Even the lingering twinges from his injuries had begun to fade.
Nadia made a disbelieving noise as she slid behind the wheel. She dug her teeth into her lower lip and curled her fingers around the gearshift with all the concentration of someone embarking on a delicate, complicated operation.
And for her, it must be. She’d certainly never driven in conditions like this, but she managed perfectly, navigating the slick road with careful skill. Shane leaned his head back against the seat and watched her.
She was muttering by the time they reached the snow-covered main road and swearing under her breath by the time they reached the research facility. Even then she shushed and scolded him until he let her help him out of the truck and into the building. She bypassed the sitting area and the bedroom he’d claimed, leading him straight to the room she’d slept in, and past it, to the bathroom.
She turned on the shower and stripped off his clothes. By the time he stood before her, naked, billows of steam rose around them. Shielding them from the rest of the world.
“Into the shower.” Strong hands coaxed him into the large tiled enclosure, where hot water splashed against his skin. Nadia joined him a moment later, stripped to the skin and watching him with worried eyes. “We need to wash the blood away so I can see your injuries.”
“What about yours?” He searched her, sliding his hands over her wet skin, but all he could find were a few shallow scratches and welling bruises.
She ignored him, her attention fixed on his hip. Her eyebrows came together as she skated her fingers over the smear of blood quickly disappearing under the spray. “I saw them bite you.”
“I—” The memory of slashing teeth seemed like an almost forgotten dream as she slipped to her knees on the floor, and Shane could barely hear his answer over the thudding of his heart. “I think they did.”
The pad of her thumb swiped over his hip. “Healed. You’re healed.” She tilted her head back and smiled. “I told the magic in the earth to take care of you for me. I think it listened.”
There was a chance that energy was also responsible for the way his cock stiffened at her touch—a chance Shane dismissed, because Nadia had had this effect on him since the first time she’d nestled into his arms. “Stand up.”
Awareness filled her eyes, and heat followed. The water pounded against his back, protecting her from the bulk of the spray as she leaned in and pressed a slow kiss to the healed skin at his hip. “Are you sure you want me to?”
Instead of answering, he hauled her to her feet with his hands under her arms. “I’m sure.”
“Shane…” Just a whisper and it trembled. She tilted her head back, closing her eyes, even as she ghosted her hands up his arms. “Is this you? Do you want me?”
“I don’t think I’ve ever felt so clear.” It came out sounding too harsh. He tried to steady his voice, but this was so damn new for him. Uncharted territory. “I’m not fighting anymore, but I’m not crazy either. And I want you, sweetheart.”
Still, she seemed uncertain. Like she didn’t dare believe, even as her grip on his shoulders pulled him closer. “All of me?”
“All of you.” His hands shook as he slid them around her waist. “With all of me.”
She slicked one hand down his chest and worked it between them, before her fingers circled his cock. “Every bit of you,” she murmured, voice wicked with promise. “Here and now, Shane. I’ve waited too long for you to take me.”
Everything but her disappeared in the roar of pleasure. He kissed her, his lips urging hers to part and let him in, let him stroke his tongue over hers. She obeyed with a moan, but there was nothing passive in the way she licked at him, the way she nipped at the tip of his tongue in wild, joyful challenge.
It would be easy to lift her against the tile, drive deep. Make them both crazy. Shane dragged his mouth to her jaw. “Can’t take my time in here.”
Her fingers slipped from his erection and found his hand instead, coaxing his fingers to stroke between her legs. She was wet already, slickly hot, and she moaned as he circled her clit and thrust deeper, eager to feel the heat of her body around his fingers.
She was tight, so tight he had to squeeze his eyes shut and drop his forehead to her shoulder. “Fuck, you feel good.”
“I feel…” The words trailed off as she shivered, clasping at his back. Her lips found his ear, and she moaned throatily and rubbed her body against him, skin slicking against skin as if she wanted to wrap herself in his scent. “I feel you.”
Him. Everything, the things he’d tried so hard to keep hidden. He raised his head, found her gaze and rocked his hand against her. “I want you to feel good. Come for me.”
Full lips parted on a gasp. Her eyes were always dark, but now they were endless, her pupils wide, her gaze unfocused. Pleasure proved itself in small ways, in her rapid breaths and the flush in her cheeks and especially in how her teeth dug into her lower lip as she began shifting her hips in tiny, furtive movements.
Even with his body blocking the bulk of the water, the spray misted her skin and left her hair a damp tangle. Strands stuck to her neck as she tilted her head, the noises escaping her more frantic than yearning. She braced one hand on his shoulder as she gasped out a plea. “Harder.”
Shane bit her neck as he complied, giving her firmer thrusts that flattened the heel of his hand hard against her clit. A soft cry echoed against the walls, then another as she tangled her fingers in his hair. Her body tightened, a trembling flutter before she moaned his name and came around his fingers in sweet, shuddering spasms.
The clench of her body along with the heady scent of her arousal threatened to shatter what remained of his control. Shane bit her again, this time on her shoulder as he lifted her against the cool tile. “Say it. Tell me.”
“Take me.” Even shaking, she wrapped her legs around his hips, rubbing the wet heat of her core against his cock. “Hard and deep, so I feel every bit of you.”
One quick thrust and he could be inside her, buried to the hilt and swimming in pleasure. Instead Shane forced himself to go slowly, to take her inch by inch. He watched her face, as enraptured by her expression of desperation as by the way she felt around him.
“Shane.” Her fingers curled. Nails dug into his shoulders. Her frantic whimper turned to a snarl as she dug her heels into the small of his back and tried to force him deeper. When he kept to his lingering, rocking advance, she moaned and tilted her head back in hard-earned submission.
When he closed his teeth on her skin again, it was hard enough to bruise. Mark. Satisfaction welled inside him, left him dizzy and panting. “I didn’t want this to be too fast, but I don’t know how long I can hold on.”
The noise that escaped her was half laugh, half disbelieving moan. “Too slow already. Show me your passion. Show me you can’t resist me.”
“Resist you?” He pulled back and slammed into her again, unable to keep the growling edge out of his voice. “Does this feel like I can resist you a single goddamn bit?”
Her only response was another of those choked noises that married lust and need. The legs wrapped around his hips were strong, sleek. No longer the weak, fearful witch he’d found, the woman in his arms was wild and hungry, challenging him as she met every rough thrust.
The fierce need that gripped him drove him on, pushed him to push her higher, faster. Take her with him.
“Shane. Shane—” She kissed his cheek. His chin. Her open mouth pressed against his with a moan, and that damn trembling started again, only this time her body was tightening around his cock.
Control was a distant memory, and he gave in, riding out her orgasm until his began, pleasure exploding through him in a shocking rush. He fisted her hair and bared her throat, muffled his groan against her soft, wet skin. “Fuck, Nadia.”
A whimper. She shivered as if they weren’t surrounded by hot water and steam. Her nails pricked his skin, dug in. “I love you.”
His knees went weak, and he reached blindly to shut off the water. “I was going to come back for you. I didn’t want to go, because I want you.” He kissed her again, hard. Desperate. “Love you.”
She smiled, that bright, open smile that made his heart flutter and skip. “You came back. For now, that’s all that matters. We can figure out everything else after we rest.”
And there was so much to decide. Where they’d go, what they’d do. “After we rest,” he agreed.
Her laughter tickled his ear. “In the bed, perhaps?”
“Bed.” He didn’t want to move, but she had to be exhausted. He lowered her to the floor and reached for a towel. “Wrap up, and we’ll get dried off.”
“I can manage.” And she did, though she wobbled, clearly more exhausted than she wanted to admit.
He picked her up, despite her protests, and carried her down the hall to the sleeping quarters. “You’re dead on your feet, sweetheart.”
“Not dead. That’s the point.” When he tried to set her down, she clasped at his arm. “Do you understand? A pack of wolves, above the freeze line, and I’m not dead.”
“I know, but it doesn’t matter.” He had to explain, make her understand what he had only just realized. “It wasn’t about you being strong enough. It was about me. I’m not a monster. I’m me.”
“You’re you,” she agreed, finally relaxing against the mattress. “I know it seems impossible—” A sleepy yawn cut through the words. “I have an idea. I’ll tell you when I wake up, if you promise to stay here and rest with me.”
Tenderness washed through him as he stretched out behind her. “I’m staying. I’ll be here, and you can tell me all about your idea. But sleep now.”
Her breathing evened, and Shane blinked to stay awake. A little longer, enough to reassure himself that she was here and that she was his.
***
The use of too much magic in too short a time had always given her unusual dreams. Fire raged through them, melting snow and leveling all in its path. She dreamed of battles fought with flames and won with sunlight, and it only made sense when she awoke to find herself half pinned under a wonderfully warm body that banished even the memory of cold.
Nadia liked sleeping with Shane, liked it more when there was nothing but skin between them. There were long days ahead—days when they’d walk on frozen earth again—but she didn’t need to fear the chill. Not with him at her side.
She tried to move carefully, but as soon as she stirred, he slipped an arm around her. “What is it?”
“I didn’t mean to wake you.” But she couldn’t regret it, not when he pulled her back against him so easily.
“I was already awake.” He smiled softly. “You must have been dreaming, because you were kicking like crazy.”
“Maybe.” She lifted her head and brushed a kiss along his cheek. “How are you feeling? How does the wolf feel?”
“Quiet.” His arm tightened. “Because you’re here, I think.”
Loath as she was to upset the peace he’d found, he needed to know the truth. “I’m afraid that might be exactly it, Shane. The earth is different here. The power has been bound to me since I spilled my blood. If I ask it to protect you, it will. I can’t promise that will be the case if we leave.”
His smile faded. “We can’t stay here forever.”
“No. We can’t.” For the worst of the winter, perhaps, if no one came to reclaim it, but a life trapped in the boundaries of stolen land was not a life worth living. Nadia cupped his cheek and met his gaze. “But if you could live like this—if the wolf was awake, but you knew it wouldn’t overtake you—would that be enough?”
Shane swallowed hard. “All I need to know is that I’m not going to hurt anyone, least of all you.”
Nadia wet her lips. Gathered her courage. “There’s a spell. Legend, really, but one witch in my lifetime is said to have performed it. It would bind me to you—not so differently than how I’m bound to the earth here, but more permanent.”
It took him a while to answer. “Is it dangerous for you?”
At least she could answer honestly. “No. It’s safer for me if we want to stay north of the border. It gives me access to the power your wolf channels. The power that overwhelms you. It might sharpen my temper, make me a bit less civilized. But I’m already a little wild.”
Shane found her hand, wound their fingers together. “If it’s permanent, are you sure you want to do it?”
“More permanent,” she corrected, ignoring the flutter in her chest. “You’re the one who should be asking yourself that question, Shane. Any spell cast can be broken…but you’d have to trust me to let you go if you asked.”
No hesitation. “I’d trust you with anything, Nadia.”
The way he said her name sent shivers through her. She closed her eyes and smiled, reveling in that soft pleasure. In the promise of a future. “All the stories say the same thing about the witch. She settled along the border, in the Outer Banks territory. We could go there, once the worst of the winter is past.”
“This station is still stocked. We could winter here, no problem, provided no one else shows up.”
“And by spring, you’ll know if extended exposure to me is likely to send you running away with your tail tucked between your legs.”
The corners of his mouth quirked up. “If traveling with you in my truck didn’t do it, nothing will.”
Nadia rolled them, until he was sprawled on his back and she could straddle his waist. Her hands dug into the pillow on either side of his head as she smiled down at him. “I was being easy on you.”
“Oh, were you?”
“Of course. But if you think you can handle me now…”
He ran his thumb over her lower lip. “I can handle you.”
She believed him. She wanted him, so she bit his thumb gently, thrilling at the way desire spilled across his features. “So handle me, Shane Sullivan.”
He smiled through his growl, even as he returned her bite by closing his teeth on the inside of her wrist. “With pleasure.”