How to Take Your Performance to the Next Level

• You have an agenda. Okay. We know that about you. We get it. And we certainly value your transparency about it. But if you want us to rally around your agenda, tie your agenda to a mission—a purpose, a set of values, a better future, something that is bigger than you, something that can include all of us. Paint this picture for us, make it genuine, and we will make so much more happen for you.

• Yes, you can be competitive. And no, you’re not a good loser—why would you ever want to become good at that? Can you now take this competitive spirit beyond a mere win-lose framework and into an outcome where both parties feel that they’ve won? If you put your mind to it, you can be the architect of these win-win outcomes. All it will take from you is the discipline of stopping for a long moment to consider the world through the eyes of the other person or team. Take the time to do this.

• Learn to separate the small things you do to spread goodwill—the gifts, the remembered birthdays, the special favors—from the actual “ask.” People want to like you and because you are excited and exciting they want to do as you ask. But they don’t want to be manipulated. To do a person a favor and then immediately make the ask: this is manipulation. To show others that you are thinking about them all the time—a note here, an interesting paper there—and then, later, a compelling challenge to act: this is true influence.

• You are an impatient person who thrills to a fast-paced, action-oriented situation. Alright. Fine. Good. We don’t want to slow you down. But we do need you not to leave us behind. So take the time to invest in a relationship with us. Invest time in understanding our perspective, our world. You can do this as quickly and intensely as you want. But do invest this time. Otherwise we will feel as though you’ve fitted us into your life, when what we really want is to feel a part of your life.

• One of your most powerful qualities may well be your sense of humor. You delight in fun and irreverence. It’s one of the ways you win people over. So practice your stories, in particular the stories where you make fun of yourself. You’ll be good at it, you’ll make yourself more appealing, and, of course, as a result people will be more inclined to help you get things done.