50
Lydia heard the click of her bedroom door. Quiet
footsteps padded across the floor. She opened her eyes a slit but
could see nothing in the darkness. She didn’t need to see.
‘What is it, Mama?’
‘I can’t sleep, darling.’
‘Go and disturb Alfred.’
‘He needs his sleep.’
‘So do I.’
‘Poof, you can sleep in class tomorrow.’
‘Mama!’
‘Hush, I shall tell you about the Flamingo
nightclub. One lucky woman was wearing a Fabergé brooch but her
frock was quite frightful. Move over.’
Lydia shifted position in the bed and Valentina lay
down on it, under the eiderdown but on top of the blankets, just
the way Lydia had done at first with Chang An Lo.
‘Did you have a good time tonight?’
‘It was bearable. That’s about all.’
‘Did you dance?’
‘Of course I did. It was the best part. When you’re
old enough I’ll take you to a dance and you’ll discover what fun it
is. The band played the new jazz with . . .’
But Lydia didn’t listen. She leaned her cheek
against her mother’s shoulder, let her musky perfume filter into
her head. She wondered if Chang An Lo was awake. What was he
thinking? She was frightened he’d leave. Just up and go. Without
her. But they both knew that in the state he was in, he’d be
caught. That he needed her. As she needed him. It was going to be
hard. Of course it was. She wasn’t blind to that fact or to the
uncertainty of the future for them, but to be together even for a
few months while he healed would give them time. Breathing space.
While they worked out the next step.
‘So?’
Dimly Lydia became aware that Valentina had stopped
speaking.
‘So?’
‘So what, Mama?’
‘I said, so who is this Chinese Bolshevik of
yours?’
‘His name is Chang An Lo and he’s a Communist.
But,’ she added quickly, ‘he comes from a wealthy family under the
last emperor and is well educated. A bit like yourself in a way . .
.’
‘I am not a Communist and never will be.’
She spat out the words. ‘The Communists take a country that is
great and noble and they smash it down with their hammers and
sickles to the lowest level of a peasant. Look at my poor broken
Russia, Rusmatushka. ’
‘Mama,’ Lydia spoke gently, ‘the Communists have
only just started. Give them time. First they have to rid us of
tyranny. Of the brutality that’s existed for hundreds of years.
That’s what they’re doing right now in Russia. And that’s what
China needs too. They are the only ones who will build a fair
society where everyone has a voice. You wait, they will become the
greatest countries in the world.’
‘Ah, you’re crazy, darling. That Bolshevik boy has
poisoned your mind and filled it with gutter slime, so that you
don’t see straight anymore.’
‘No, you’re so wrong. I see clearer now.’
‘Poof! It is a two-minute infatuation.’
‘No, Mama, no. I love him.’
Valentina drew in a quick breath. ‘Don’t be absurd.
You are too young to know what love is.’
‘You were only seventeen when you ran off and
married Papa. You loved him, you know you did. So don’t you dare
tell me I don’t love Chang An Lo.’
There was a silence. The darkness grew heavy around
them, pressing down on Lydia’s eyes, but she refused to let it into
her head. She reached out to Chang An Lo with her mind and found
him so easily, it was hard to believe he wasn’t in the room with
her. The connection was instant. And she was certain he was lying
awake in Mr Theo’s house, seeking her out. She smiled and felt the
inside of her head open up into a big bright airy room, full of
sunlight, and the sound of Lizard Creek’s water trickled through
it. A place where she could breathe.
‘Listen to me, Mama.’
It was easy. At last to talk about him. She told
her mother all about Chang An Lo. How he’d saved her in the
alleyway and how she’d sewn up his foot at Lizard Creek. She told
Valentina everything, the Chinese funeral and the search for him,
even the quarrel in the burned-out house and the arguments over
some of the savage methods the Communists used to achieve their
aims. It all came spilling out. Everything. Well, almost
everything. Two things she left out. The ruby necklace and the
lovemaking. She managed to hang on to those. She wasn’t that
stupid.
When she’d finished, she felt as if she were
floating.
‘Oh my sweet daughter.’ Valentina turned and kissed
Lydia’s cheek. ‘You are such a fool.’
‘I love him, Mama. And he loves me.’
‘It’s got to stop, dochenka.’
‘No.’
‘Yes.’
‘No.’
Valentina’s hand took hold of Lydia’s under the
eiderdown and held it as if in a vice. ‘I’m sorry, darling, your
heart will break but there are worse things. You will survive it,
believe me, you will. We have come this far, you and I. I am not
letting you throw it all away just when I have set it up so that
there is money for your education, for university. You could be a
doctor or a lawyer or a professor, something great, something
important. Something well paid. You’ll be proud of yourself and
hold your head high. Never will you have to be dependent on a man
to put bread on your table or rings on your fingers. Don’t ruin
everything. Not now.’
‘Mama, did you listen when your parents told you
the same?’
‘No, but . . .’
‘So neither will I.’
‘Lydia.’ Valentina sat up abruptly. ‘You will do as
I say. And I say this business with the Chinese Bolshevik is over,
even if I have to chain you to the bed and feed you bread and water
for the rest of your life. You hear me?’
Lydia didn’t mean to say what she said next. But
she was angry and hurt. So she struck back.
‘Maybe if I tell Alfred what I saw in the Buick
today he would say the same to you.’
She heard Valentina cough. The sound she’d heard a
chicken make when its neck is wrung. She wanted to cram the words
back into her mouth. Valentina swung her legs to the floor but
remained there, seated on the edge of the bed. Her back to Lydia.
She said nothing.
‘Why, Mama? Why? You have Alfred.’
Her mother rustled in her dressing gown pocket and
Lydia knew she was searching for a cigarette, but it was obviously
empty because there was no snick of a lighter.
‘It’s none of your business,’ Valentina said at
last in a tight voice.
Lydia rolled nearer and put out a hand. Her
mother’s stiff figure was blacker than the surrounding blackness.
She touched her mother’s shoulder and for a second had a flashback
to reaching out and touching a male shoulder earlier this evening.
Alexei Serov’s. He had seen her home and she’d had to admit he’d
been quite decent about her mistake. Sweet Christ, she’d made such
a fool of herself. Filthy whore-boy. Lying bastard. He had
every right to fling her out into the street. But he didn’t. Just
became even more arrogant with that conceited smile of his while
she danced with him. Only one dance. She couldn’t stand any
more.
She could feel the warm silk of her mother’s kimono
under her fingers. ‘Why?’ she asked again.
Valentina shrugged, as if it were nothing. ‘A
fling.’
‘Mama, I’ve seen you with him. You hate him.’
‘Of course I hate that devil, God rot his stinking
soul.’
‘Was it because of the photographs?’
Valentina stopped breathing.
‘I’ve got them.’ Lydia stroked her mother’s back.
‘And the negatives.’
Valentina gave a brief sob. ‘How?’
‘I stole them.’
‘It’s what you are good at.’
‘Yes.’
‘Thank you.’ It was a whisper.
‘So it is my business.’
‘Very well. You asked.’ Her mother took a deep
breath. ‘There was no real scholarship to the Willoughby Academy.
You’d spent four wasted years in the local charity school here and
I knew you would just be smothered and die in that hellhole. So I
sought out the best private school, the Willoughby Academy, and the
chief officer for education in Junchow. Mr Mason. And I made him an
offer. Create a scholarship. Award it to you. In exchange for . .
.’
‘ . . . you?’
‘Yes.’
Lydia slid her arms around her mother and rocked
her gently. ‘Oh, Mama.’
‘I couldn’t get rid of him even after I married.
Because of the photographs.’
‘I’ll burn them.’
‘I’d burn him, if I could.’
‘Mama,’ Lydia moaned and tightened her
embrace.
‘So now you will do as I ask?’ Valentina twisted
around, her face close to her daughter’s, two dark eyeless shadows.
‘You’ll give up your Chinese Bolshevik?’
Lydia pulled her coat more firmly around her and
stamped her cold feet on the rock-hard patch of lawn under the
eucalyptus tree. She had been waiting an hour. The garage hid the
house from her, just as it hid her from the house, and she’d had
plenty of time to study the wall she was sheltering behind. It was
made of red bricks and she’d counted how many lay in each row.
Sixty-two. She had plucked three snails off the mortar and tossed
them into the shrubbery, and watched a brown-legged spider cocoon a
beetle that blundered into its web. There wasn’t much else to
watch.
A crow took off above her from the eucalyptus tree,
making the silver leaves quiver, and with two slow beats of its
heavy wings it drifted over the tiles of the garage roof and up
high into the chilly air. She squinted up at it. The sky was a
milky blue, full of soft swirls of white that reminded Lydia of a
marble she’d once owned. She’d found it in a gutter, a bright patch
of blue sky buried among the filth. She’d kept it safe in her
pocket for four days, but in the end was tempted into a game of
marbles by a gang of boys in the playground. She’d played and lost.
When she saw her marble bundled with a handful of others into a
grubby pocket, she felt she’d betrayed it.
A car door slammed. It was somewhere farther down
Walnut Road and an engine growled into life. That was good. People
were waking up, going off to work at last. It wouldn’t be long now.
It had been still dark when she’d put on her school uniform and
slipped out of the house, a thin gleam of gold painted along the
eastern horizon. She’d had the sense to leave a note. Gone to
library. To finish homework. They wouldn’t know it didn’t open
until eight-thirty, and actually it was a relief to skip breakfast
with Alfred. He was awkward first thing in the morning and had a
habit of looking up from his porridge with a frown, blinking hard
behind his spectacles, as if wondering who on earth these two
strangers were at his breakfast table.
Lydia thumped her gloved hands together and let out
a long breath. Watched it curl away from her as solid as cigarette
smoke. She drew in another deep breath, but it was an effort. Her
lungs hurt. They just wouldn’t work properly. It was her mother’s
words. They lay like a lead burden on her, crushing her
chest.
It wasn’t right.
‘Mr Mason.’
‘Good God, girl, you startled me.’
He looked so smart, so upright. A fedora and alpaca
coat. A black lizard-skin briefcase snug under his arm, car keys in
hand. The picture of respectability. Pillar of society. Lydia
wanted to tear his eyes out and feed them to the crow.
‘What are you doing loitering around my
garage?’
‘I’m not loitering. I’m waiting to speak to
you.’
‘Oh, not now. I’m in a hurry to get to the
office.’
‘Yes, now.’
Something in her voice made him pause and look at
her. His grey eyes grew wary. ‘Can’t it wait?’
‘No.’
‘Very well.’ He unlocked the garage and swung open
the doors. The Buick’s big chrome headlights stared out at
her.
‘I have the photographs.’
His hand dropped the car keys. He bent, picked them
up, tried to bluff it out. ‘What photographs?’
‘Don’t.’
He pulled himself up tall, pushed out his chest,
came and stood too close. ‘Look, young lady, I’m a busy man and I
have no idea what you’re talking . . .’
She slapped him. A long swing with her arm and then
her palm full on his cheek. The crack of it sounded loud in the
still air. She was shocked, but not as shocked as he was. His eyes
glazed for a moment. The red imprint of her hand with fingers
splayed was stamped on his cheek. His fists came up but she stepped
back out of reach.
‘That’s what it feels like. To be knocked about,
you wife-beating pervert. Taking nude pictures of your own daughter
. . .’
He lunged for her. She dodged.
‘What would Sir Edward Carlisle have to say about
that?’
‘Now you get this straight, girl, it’s not . .
.’
‘Don’t. I don’t want to hear your lies, you piece
of slime. Sir Edward will sack you on the spot.’
His face grew ashen. He was having trouble
swallowing, but his eyes remained shrewd. He held up one neatly
manicured hand in a gesture of peace.
‘All right, Lydia. Let’s get down to business.
You’re no fool. I’ll give you ten thousand dollars for the
photographs and negatives. ’
Ten thousand dollars.
A fortune. Her head swayed.
‘You can have it in cash. This afternoon.’ He was
watching her closely and suddenly reached into his pocket and
pulled out his wallet. He yanked out a thick wedge of notes and
fanned them out like cards unsder her nose. ‘Here. Take this. As a
starter.’
Ten thousand dollars.
Ten thousand dollars would buy anything.
Everything. Passports. Visas. Pianos. First-class boat tickets. She
could take her mother to England and flee. Oxford University, just
as her mother wanted. It was all there, in Mason’s hand. All she
had to do was say yes. And she could take Chang An Lo to safety
with her.
But would he come? Leave China?
Mason’s lips pulled into a thin line. It was meant
as a smile. ‘Agreed?’
She opened her mouth to say yes.
‘No.’
‘Don’t be a bloody stupid fool. This is your
chance.’
‘But you’d have the photographs.’
‘I’d destroy them, I promise.’
‘No.’
‘Why?’
She opened her hands to the sky, letting the money
go. ‘Because you are scum. I don’t trust you. As long as I hang on
to those negatives, I can be certain you will never lay a finger on
Polly again. Or your wife. Or my mother. Do you understand
me?’
He scowled, turned away. She watched the money
return to the wallet. Her throat hurt.
‘Don’t come near my mother anymore.’
‘Go to hell, bitch.’
He walked to the car, his head sunk on his chest,
and lashed out at one of the tyres with a brutal kick.
‘Mr Mason.’
He didn’t look at her.
‘Mr Mason, leave Theo Willoughby alone too.’
Mason made a harsh sound that sent a shiver down
her spine. ‘Don’t you worry about him,’ he retorted. ‘Feng and his
son between them will look after Willoughby.’ His eyes crept back
to hers, and the expression in them made her skin crawl. ‘Just like
they’ll look after you.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Now they know who took care of the
Communist.’
‘What Communist?’
‘Don’t play innocent. The one they’re after. The
one you nursed.’
Lydia felt ice spike her veins. ‘That’s a
lie.’
‘No. Polly told me.’
‘Polly?’
‘Oh yes. Your loyal little friend. Still want to
protect her, do you? Yes, she told me and I told them. Right now
they’re probably at your house.’ He laughed outright. ‘You didn’t
really think I’d give a bitch like you ten thousand dollars, did
you? You and your whoring mother can . . .’
But Lydia was already running.
She burst into her house.
‘Mama,’ she shouted. ‘Mama.’
No reply.
The houseboy - what was his name? Deng? - she
called out for him. He came running.
‘Yes, Missy Leeja?’
‘My mother, where is she?’
‘I not know.’
She pounced on him and shook his bony shoulders.
‘Is she here?’
‘No, she out.’
‘So early?’
‘She go with Master. In car.’
‘Just the two of them?’
His bright eyes were nervous of her as he held up
two fingers. ‘Master and Missy.’
She released him and he scuttled away, hunched like
a beetle. Her tongue licked her dry lips. She’d panicked for
nothing. But that didn’t mean the danger wasn’t there. It was. She
walked into the drawing room and stared out the French windows. How
the hell do you fight back when you can’t see your enemy? She
leaned her forehead against the icy pane of glass and thought about
that. Something broke loose inside her. Everything felt too heavy.
Too big.
Her gaze was drawn to the shed, and because it was
the nearest she could get to Chang An Lo right now, she opened the
glass door and walked down toward it. The air was cold and crisp in
her lungs and her head began to clear. She became aware of a
crunching noise. A rat was gnawing at one of the wooden planks at
the bottom of the shed. Her pulse picked up. What was it
after?
‘Scoot,’ she shouted and the creature fled.
The padlock was still locked but the bolt attached
to it hung uselessly on the door, the screws prised out. She gave a
faint moan. Her hand reached out and touched the door. The wood was
warm in the sun. Adrenaline hit her system. She pushed. The door
swung open. She screamed.
Blood. So much of it. Red. Sticky. Everywhere.
Walls. Ceiling. Floor. On the wire of the hutch and on the sacks.
As if someone had painted with blood. The raw stench of it mixed
with the stink of faeces but Lydia didn’t notice the smell.
‘Sun Yat-sen,’ she screamed.
The rabbit was lying in the middle of a pool of
blood on the floor, his white fur caked with bright crimson. Even
his big yellow teeth were red. Lydia knelt beside him, careless of
her school uniform, and tears poured down her cheeks.
‘Sun Yat-sen,’ she whispered and lifted him into
her arms.
He was still warm. Still alive. But barely. One leg
twitched and a strange strangled screech whistled from his small
pulsing body. His ears had been hacked off and rammed into his
mouth, and his throat was cut. She pulled out the long, soft ears.
Held him close. Rocked him and crooned to him. Until the final
spasm stiffened his spine. His bloodshot eyes started to
glaze.
Her head lowered over him, sobs raked her body. The
blow, when it came, wiped out her misery. Darkness took over.