When Bernie heard the knock on her apartment door, she looked out the peephole, her heart thudding with anticipation. Sure enough, Jeremy was standing at her door. She had no idea why he hadn’t signed the papers on the spot yesterday, but with luck, in the next few minutes they’d be putting this matter to rest once and for all.
She opened the door to find him wearing his usual scruffy jeans and faded Polo shirt. Any other man wearing those things might look unkempt. Not Jeremy. He’d once entertained some business associates in a sky box at a football game wearing a pair of cargo shorts, a Cowboys T-shirt, and flip-flops. She’d watched silently from the corner, thinking the only way he could have looked more handsome was if he took off his clothes altogether.
“Bridges. What a surprise.”
“Surprise? Didn’t I say we’d talk today?”
“I assumed you’d summon me to your office.”
“I was in the neighborhood.” He glanced back over his shoulder with an expression of disgust. “Okay, so that’s a lie.”
Don’t bite back. Just keep things friendly until you can get his name on the dotted line.
“Is Max with you?” she said, stepping back to allow Jeremy to enter.
“I took this trip on my own.”
“That’s not wise.”
“Concerned about me?”
“Old habits are hard to break.”
“This is private business, so I came alone. Where are the papers?”
Thank God. This was going to be easier than she had thought.
She walked over to pick them up. “I’m glad you’ve decided to sign,” she said, turning back and handing them to him. “It really is better for both of us. I know the last thing you want is to be saddled with a…” She paused, watching as he turned the papers sideways.
“What are you doing?”
He ripped them in half. Bernie’s mouth fell open. “What the hell are you doing?”
Then he tore those pieces in half.
“Bridges!”
He handed her the decimated contract. She stared down at the jagged pieces in total disbelief. “Are you out of your mind?”
“Not last time I checked.”
“Well, you haven’t accomplished anything,” she said. “I have another copy.”
“Great. Hand it to me. I’ll tear it up, too.”
She tossed the pieces of paper down on her dining room table. “Why are you doing this?”
“I told you I’d make up my mind in twenty-four hours.” He nodded toward the torn-up contract. “There’s my decision.”
She glared at him. “A simple no would have sufficed.”
“I doubt that. If I hadn’t torn it up, you’d still be trying to shove it in front of me.”
“That’s right. I would. Because the best thing for both of us is for you to go away and pretend all this never happened.”
“But it did happen, and both of us are going to have to live with it.”
A swirl of nausea kicked up in Bernie’s stomach, and not just because of the morning sickness that had plagued her like a bad case of the flu that wouldn’t go away. This couldn’t be happening. She knew Jeremy. She knew his biggest fear had to be that he’d get a woman pregnant and have to deal with the consequences. So why was he being so obstinate?
“You just can’t stand for anyone to tell you you can’t have something,” she said hotly. “Even something you don’t want.”
“Who says I don’t want it? I never really thought about having a baby, but you know, I’m not getting any younger. So why not?”
“Damn it, Bridges! You could find a dozen women in the next hour who would have your baby! Don’t take mine.”
“Ours.”
That single word said she was tied to him forever, and she hated the sound of it.
“Why are you doing this?” she asked. “You know you don’t want to be a father.”
Jeremy’s expression darkened. “Stop making assumptions about what I want. You’ll be wrong every time.”
Bernie searched his face for any sign of insincerity, but she didn’t see it. Still, it was so incomprehensible to her that he’d want anything to do with fatherhood, so completely at odds with the life he’d so deliberately built for himself, that she found it impossible to believe him.
Maybe it was time to find out just how serious he was about being involved with this baby.
“You know what?” she told him. “You’re right. You’re the father. You should have input.”
“I’m glad you see it my way.”
“But any involvement you have comes with conditions.”
“Conditions?”
“You’re not just going to sit in that big house of yours and play dictator. And you’re not going to be one of those men who just throws money at his kid as if that’s all a kid needs. You have to give to get. If your name is on the birth certificate, you’re going to be a father in every sense of the word.”
His smug expression vanished. “What do you mean?”
“Well, for starters, I have an ultrasound scheduled for tomorrow afternoon. I expect you to be there.”
He blinked with disbelief. “You want me to come to your doctor’s exam?”
“All good fathers do.”
“I should think you’d want your privacy.”
“Where you’re concerned, my privacy disappeared weeks ago.”
“Tomorrow’s out of the question. I’m right in the middle of an acquisition. Things are happening very quickly, so now’s not really a good time.”
“Fine. I’ll reschedule for next week.”
“I have a full schedule next week.”
“Then the week after that.”
“I’m late for a meeting. I’ll have to check my schedule and get back to you.” He headed for the door.
“Just as I figured,” Bernie said.
Jeremy spun around. “What?”
“A father in name only. My child could do so much better. Unfortunately, he’s stuck with you.”
His jaw tightened with irritation. “I have responsibilities.”
“I understand completely.” She nodded toward the pieces of paper on the table. “Shall I get the other copy?”
For a few unguarded moments, Jeremy’s Adam’s apple bobbed with a heavy swallow. When he eyed the pen on her dining room table, it looked as if she’d been right. Jeremy didn’t care about this baby. He just cared about winning. The moment she forced his hand by putting the image of real fatherhood squarely in front of him—
“I’ll be there,” he said.
Bernie blinked. “What?”
“I said I’ll be there tomorrow for your ultrasound appointment.”
“But I thought you said—”
“It’s what you want, isn’t it?”
Bernie’s knees suddenly felt weak. Could Jeremy be more serious about this than she’d thought?
No. He thought she was bluffing. That was all. And he was calling her on it. What could she do now but go along with it?
“Yes, of course,” she said. “My appointment is at Dr. Marge Underwood’s office on K Street in East Plano. One o’clock.”
He nodded. “One o’clock it is.”
With that, he left her apartment, closing the door behind him.
Bernie stood there for a moment, dumbfounded at what she’d just done. She’d intended to end this day with Jeremy out of her life and her baby’s forever, and now he was coming to her doctor’s appointment with her?
She walked to the door in a daze and locked it behind him. She moved to the sofa and sat down, thinking back to her first obstetrical appointment a few days ago. Across from her in the waiting room sat a young pregnant woman and her husband. She remembered how the two of them had been chatting quietly, and then the woman’s eyes lit up. She grabbed her husband’s hand and rested it on her belly. Both of them froze for a few seconds, waiting. The woman let out a soft gasp, and they turned to each other with a smile. When he leaned in to give her a kiss, Bernie felt a stab of envy that went straight to her heart, a feeling so powerful she’d been forced to turn away.
And now, when she thought about Jeremy sitting next to her in that waiting room tomorrow, the crack in her heart widened and bled just a little bit more. She’d made the right decision to have this baby. She’d never regret that as long as she lived. But was it wrong to want a husband, too? Someone she could turn to when she felt so tired and overwhelmed she just couldn’t take another step? Someone who would love her just as much as he loved their baby?
She sighed. No. It wasn’t wrong to want that. It just wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
And it certainly wasn’t going to happen with Jeremy.