two
brea thought about everything
her sisters had said. She’d thought about it well into the
night as she sat downstairs in the living room reading after
everyone had gone to the bar in town. She’d begged off, claiming a
headache. She had some thinking to do about herself. About
men.
She hadn’t been paying attention. Or looking at the
guys who allegedly had been looking at her. Had some of the men on
this ranch been watching her? She found that so hard to believe.
But maybe she shouldn’t. Maybe it was time to start believing in
herself.
A very hard thing to do when every time she looked
in the mirror she still saw the gawky, chubby girl who just wasn’t
pretty. You hear that enough times, you get shot down by men enough
times, you start to believe that maybe you just aren’t worthy. She
wasn’t strong enough to build herself up. Which was why it was so
much easier to imagine herself the lithe, strong, smart, capable
heroines in the romance novels she read. She could put herself in
their places, live their lives, fall in love with their incredibly
romantic heroes who would sweep them off their feet and love them
no matter what. And not once in those books did the hero tell the
heroine he’d totally fall for her if she could lose ten
pounds.
And even if she did find the guys approachable,
would it make any difference? She’d gone the sex route before and
found it decidedly lacking. Or rather, found herself decidedly
lacking. She was afraid she’d set herself up by romanticizing sex
the way it was in the books she read. And sex just wasn’t that good
in person. Not the sex she’d had, anyway.
Too restless to read, she stood and stretched, then
noticed a light on at the bunkhouse. She was surprised, since she’d
seen everyone pile into the trucks and take off for town. She
wouldn’t mind a little company. Maybe Grizz had stayed behind and
she could talk him into a game of gin. He often didn’t go into town
with everyone.
She headed down the walk toward the bunkhouse,
breathing in the night air, the smell of hay and cattle and horses.
Not unpleasant smells at all to her, since they all signaled spring
settling in. She knocked on the bunkhouse door, but no one
answered. Maybe no one was there at all, and they’d just left the
light on. She tried the door, and it was unlocked, so she opened
it, thinking she’d find it empty.
Music was playing, loud, coming from one of the
other rooms.
“Anyone here?” she yelled. “Door was open.”
She moved in farther, shaking her head at the
disarray. Cowboys definitely lived here. Scattered boots all over
the floor, dishes left on the tables in the living room, beer and
pop cans littering every available surface. Brea knew Grizz would
get after the guys about once a week to clean the place up, and
they’d do their housecleaning, but other than that, they mainly
lived like pigs. It was like a dorm, and some of the cowboys who
didn’t have their own place or lived farther out of town were
welcome to stay here.
She started picking up a few cans since she didn’t
have anything better to do and figured the place was empty. When
the call came to load up the trucks and head into town, you either
hustled or got left behind. Chances were the last one out the door
hadn’t turned off the stereo and lights. She’d get those on her way
out. She had her arms full of beer cans and was headed into the
kitchen when she heard someone whistling. She stopped and
pivoted.
“Brea. What are you doing here?”
Her breath caught and she nearly dropped the armful
of aluminum she carried.
It was Gage, fresh from a shower, his hair damp and
curling around his neck, his body still dripping, and a towel
balanced on his hips. Broad shoulders, wide, ripped chest devoid of
any hair. Washboard abs, slim hips and, dammit, even his feet were
sexy.
The rest of him she couldn’t see under the towel he
wore. Which was all he wore except for a damn sexy smile as his
lips curled.
Brea’s heart kicked up about twenty notches and she
fought to swallow. “I knocked. Didn’t think anyone was here. I’m so
sorry.” Her face flamed with heat. She was so not pretty when she
blushed.
“Don’t be. Why are you cleaning up?”
She shifted her gaze away from his taut, flat abs
to the beer cans in her arms. “Oh. Uh, well I saw them lying
around.”
“Drop them. You’re nobody’s maid.”
Grateful to tear herself away from his killer body,
she turned and headed into the kitchen. “Don’t be ridiculous. I’ll
just throw these away.” And then try to crawl
out of here with my dignity intact. And without looking at you
again.
Because it was possible if she got another look at
him she might want to pull that knot out of his towel and see the
rest of him. Arousal flared in her, making her breathing
difficult.
“So,” he said, seemingly unconcerned that he was
practically naked, “why did you come over here?”
It was probably stupid to keep her back turned to
him. She spun around to face him. “I . . . I saw a light on here. I
thought Grizz had stayed behind, so I was going to see if he’d like
to play some gin.”
He folded his arms over his chest, which only
served to showcase his mighty fine guns. Damn, he had nice muscles.
“Grizz decided to party it up some tonight with everyone else. Why
didn’t you go?”
She shrugged. “I had some reading to do.”
“Reading, huh? What kind of reading?”
Her eyes drifted closed for a second then opened
again. Might as well end this now. She lifted her gaze to his.
“Romance novels.”
“Oh yeah? I like horror myself. The bloodier the
better.”
What? No making fun of her reading tastes? No crack
about romance novels being fluff? What the hell was the matter with
this guy? “I’ve read some horror, too. I read a lot.”
“I do, too, when I have some time and can get away
from the constant noise around here. It’s hard to concentrate when
half the guys around here think this is a party house.”
She laughed, then found herself relaxing. “I can
imagine. I like a quiet place to read.”
“Me, too. Sometimes I take my horse out to one of
the pastures to read on the weekends.”
“Oh, that’s a great idea. No one can disturb you
out there.” She couldn’t believe she was having a conversation
about books with one of the sexiest cowboys on the ranch. She was
probably dreaming this, but what the hell.
He moved toward her, and her muscles tensed
again.
“Why didn’t you go into town tonight?” she
asked.
He shrugged. “Not in the mood to party.”
She couldn’t figure him out. Not at all. He was
damn fine looking, could probably have his choice of any woman in
town. They’d be all over a hot guy like Gage. And he preferred
staying home alone? He was like . . . her. That made no sense at
all.
“So what else do you like to do for fun besides
reading, Brea?”
“Uh, um, not much, really.” She took a step back,
then hit the wall. She would look like an obvious coward if she
moved around it, so she stayed put and watched him advance on
her.
“That’s all you do? Just work, and read?”
“Yes. Yeah. Pretty much.”
He stopped in front of her, only an inch or so
separating them. Any other guy invading her personal space like
this would piss her off. With Gage, though, she wanted him closer.
She wanted his body pressed full-on against her. God, he smelled so
good. Like soap and something indescribable. Earthy and sexy and oh
man she wanted to lick that spot on his neck where water dripped
from his hair, coating his skin with droplets of moisture. She
licked her lips and focused on his face instead. But then she got
lost in his eyes—deep blue like an ocean, fringed with long black
lashes that were almost too pretty for a man. Almost, but not
quite.
Okay, Brea, stop ogling and say
something intelligent.
“Um, what do you do, Gage?”
He searched her face, and he wasn’t smiling now. “I
train horses. I ride. I read. I like to go to town now and then. I
like to go to movies sometimes. I like museums.”
She cocked her head to the side. “You like
museums?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
He laughed. “You think it’s odd that a cowboy would
go to a museum?”
“No. Yes.” She frowned, shook her head. “I don’t
know. Maybe. You confuse the hell out of me, Gage. I don’t know
what I’m saying. I should go.”
“Why do you want to go, Brea? Do I make you
uncomfortable?”
She swallowed. “Yes.”
“Good uncomfortable or bad uncomfortable?”
His question made her pause. “Honestly? I don’t
know.”
gage watched the stream of
reactions cross brea’s face. She might try to hide what she
felt, but her expressions told him everything. Which was a damn
good thing, because what she said confused the hell out of him. Her
body said one thing, while her mouth said something else
entirely.
And his body’s reaction to finding her in the
bunkhouse while he’d just been in the shower thinking about
her—getting hard thinking about her—now that was a bonus. Hell,
he’d been getting hard thinking about her since the day she’d
stepped foot on the Bar M wearing her quirky skirts and sandals,
trying to hide behind all that hair. He’d thought her sexy and
mysterious then. When she’d gone into Tulsa with Jolene and come
back looking like a goddamn fashion model, he’d just about
swallowed his tongue. No matter how she dressed and how she wore
her hair, Brea was beautiful. It was in her eyes—a mysterious
chocolate brown that couldn’t hide her thoughts or reactions.
And the flimsy towel he wore did nothing to
disguise his reaction to her. Good thing
she seemed too preoccupied to notice the nice tent the towel made
in the vicinity of his dick. He liked talking to her, liked her
being here with him, and he didn’t want to scare her away with his
raging hard-on.
The last thing he’d ever do was push a woman into
doing something she didn’t want to do. He liked his women willing.
So if Brea was throwing off mixed signals, he’d just as soon step
away. The thing was, he didn’t think he’d read her wrong out at the
barn today, or even the last couple weeks since she’d arrived at
the ranch. She’d tossed enough glances his way that let him know
she was damn well interested. That’s why he always zeroed in on her
eyes—the ones that always seemed to be glancing his way. A man
would have to be dead or disinterested not to notice. And he sure
as hell wasn’t dead or disinterested.
It was just getting her to admit her interest that might be tough.
Then again, she might want him to take charge. And
yeah, he liked being in control, so if that’s what she wanted—as
long as he was damn sure that’s what she wanted—he was all over
it.
“Tell me what I do to make you
uncomfortable.”
He liked the way she blushed. It was sweet,
innocent, and a lot of the women he’d been with had long ago
forgotten how to blush—over anything.
“I . . . You’re very direct, aren’t you?” She cast
her gaze somewhere over his left shoulder. He tipped her chin and
put it back on his face.
“Yeah, I am. I don’t think there should be any
misunderstanding between a man and a woman. If you’re honest with
each other up front, then there’s no disappointment later
on.”
“I guess you’re right about that. Most men I’ve
known haven’t been very honest.”
He cocked his head to the side. “Honest about
what?”
“Anything. Everything. What they want, how they
feel, what they’re thinking about. They’ve all been one great big
mystery I’ve never been able to figure out.”
And probably all jerkwads, too. “You’ll find out
real fast I’m not a mystery, Brea. I’ll tell you anything you want
to know, and I’ll be honest with you.”
If it had been possible for her to lean farther
into the wall, she would have. “That would be refreshing.”
He laid his palm next to her head, wanting so damn
bad to press his body against hers, to feel her lush body, to tuck
his head against her neck so he could inhale her fragrance. But he
didn’t want to push her into anything she wasn’t ready for. This
filly was skittish. He wanted to give her a taste of what she could
have, but it was up to her to ask for it, to tell him she wanted
what he intended to offer her. And he wanted her coming into it
with her eyes wide open.
“I’ll tell you right now I like you. I want to get
to know you better. But I’m not looking for a relationship or
romance. I’m a drifter, Brea. I move from one place to another, so
I’ll let you know up front that while I’m attracted to you, I’m not
boyfriend or husband material.”
“I see.”
“I want to kiss you, touch you all over. I’d like
to get you naked, lick every inch of your body and make you come in
ways you could never imagine.”
Her big brown eyes widened. “Oh, my.”
“Does that scare you?”
“No. That’s . . . really honest.” But he saw her
throat work as she fought to swallow. Yeah, she was scared all
right.
“I’m gonna kiss you now, Brea. Okay?”
She gave a shaky nod. “Okay.”
He moved in, pressed his body flush against hers.
Damn, that felt nice. She was all firm, lush curves, and he
couldn’t resist touching her. But like a wild horse, she was jumpy
and flinched at the first touch of his hand against the bare skin
of her shoulder.
“Easy, honey.” He kept his hand there, then let it
slide slow and easy down her arm. “See? Nothing to be afraid
of.”
“I’m not afraid of you.”
He smiled down at her. “Bullshit. I terrify
you.”
Her lips lifted. “Maybe a little.”
“I’m not going to hurt you. I’m just going to kiss
you.” Holding only her wrist with his fingers, he leaned in and
brushed his mouth against hers, a slow slide of lips against lips,
breathing in her breath. Oh, man, she tasted sweet, her lips so
soft he wanted to press in and go deeper. But he didn’t, just took
it slow and easy, letting her get used to having him close to her,
his mouth against hers, until she sighed and relaxed. Then he moved
in, slid an arm around her waist and tugged her against him, again
nice and easy, not with the violent passion he had to work hard to
restrain.
He wanted this woman, wanted her bad, wanted to
bury his straining, hard cock inside her. Hell, he wanted to do a
lot of things with her, including get her naked and spread-eagled
on his bed so he could touch and kiss her all over. He wanted the
sweet mouth she kissed him with wrapped around his throbbing dick.
But none of that was going to happen tonight, not when she was
still wary, so he was just going to have to tamp down his needs and
see to hers.
So he let her get used to the feel of his mouth on
hers. Light kisses, with just the touch of his tongue against the
seam of her lips. And maybe he did press his body against hers, and
maybe she could feel his erection—after all, he was only wearing a
towel, and he couldn’t mask his hard-on—but he wanted her to know
how she made him feel. And when she moaned and unglued herself from
the wall to align her body with his and laid her hands on his
shoulders, he took that as a positive sign.
So he did have to rein in his baser impulses, like
ripping off his towel, then her clothes, and burying his cock
inside her. There was plenty of time for that later. With Brea he’d
have to take baby steps. While he didn’t know everything about her,
he could tell she had a decided lack of experience, and he didn’t
want to overpower her. So he settled for a few kisses, lightly
holding her, and gritting his teeth against his overwhelming urges.
He wanted her to feel in control, like she could take a step back
at any time and just walk away and catch her breath.
Only she wasn’t stepping back. She wasn’t walking
away. She leaned into him, wrapped her arms around his neck,
deepened the kiss and slid her thigh between his legs, pressing her
jean-clad pussy against him. And she made sounds that would drive a
sane man crazy.
Gage had all kinds of control, but he was still a
man. A damn near naked man with throbbing balls and a moaning, sexy
woman in his arms kissing him like she wanted him. He liked her
eager, but he was afraid his careful control was going to shatter
in the next few seconds if he wasn’t the one to take a step back
and run like hell.
He broke the kiss, sucked in a breath of air and
extricated himself from her arms around his neck. He smiled down at
her and kissed her fingers. “I think that’s enough for
tonight.”
Her eyes were glassy, her lips puffy from their
kisses. She had a hazy smile that gradually receded as she frowned
in confusion. “What? You’re stopping? Why?”
He took a careful step back, hoping like hell his
towel would stay attached to his hips. “Because I want you to think
about what you really want.”
She moved forward again. “I know what I want. I
want you.”
Now his lips curled. “A minute ago you said I
terrified you.”
She shook her head. “Now you don’t. I’m fine,
really.”
He folded her hands over each other, then took
another step back, creating distance between them. Whether it was
for her or him he wasn’t sure. “Think about it, Brea. Make sure you
know exactly what you want before you decide it’s me.”
She heaved a shaky sigh. “Fine.” She moved to push
past him. She was hurt and angry. He didn’t want her to
misunderstand, so he grabbed her wrist, jerked her against
him.
“I don’t want you to get the wrong idea.”
She tilted her head back. “I don’t think I got the
wrong idea at all. I think you made yourself perfectly
clear.”
“No. I don’t think I did. I was patient with you
tonight, Brea. I held back. This is what I want you to make sure
you’re ready for.” He fisted his hand in her hair, brought his lips
to hers and gave her what he’d wanted to give her all night—a real
kiss. She gasped as he parted her lips with his and drove his
tongue inside her mouth. He claimed her mouth with demand, with
possession, with the understanding that if she came to him again,
she’d be his for the taking. He wound his tongue around hers, then
sucked, crushing his lips against hers, pushing her back against
the wall and letting her feel him—all of him—until there was no
mistaking exactly what he wanted. And when he’d pushed her—and
himself—to the brink, he let go.
Brea’s eyes shot open.
“If that’s what you want, if that’s what you can
handle, then you let me know.”
She still hadn’t moved; she stared at him in shock
and confusion. It took all the willpower he had to stay away from
her.
“Good night, Brea.”
He turned and walked back into the bathroom, his
cock hard, his body on fire for her. The kiss had shaken him more
than any other woman had before. She might not be experienced, but
she banked a fire that, once stoked, would burn out of
control.
He wanted to be the one to light that fire, stoke
its embers and watch it rage.