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at his friend and gratefully took it. Spock’s grip was firm, feverishly warm, and seemed to McCoy to emanate such calm, compassionate strength that he found himself misting up again. “I can’t believe it,” the doctor said, with sudden anguish. “Three days, and I just can’t get used to it. l can’t believe Jim is gone.” “He is gone.” Spock’s tone was flat, with a faint trace of bitterness. “Whether we believe it or not.” He slowly released McCoy’s grip, and nodded at the chairs. “Shall we sit?” “Oh. Yes.” McCoy retook his seat; the Vulcan settled I beside him. For a moment, the two sat in comfortable silence, their gazes directed ahead, at the lilies beside the podium. And then McCoy said, “Spock… do you remember when we were in Yosemite, with Jim? When he said that he always knew he’d die alone?” “Yes,” Spock answered evenly. “I can’t help thinking I should have been there with him. I mean, I know you couldn’t bernyou were involved in a mission with your father~but I was simply off with Joanna watching my grandchild’s graduation. I guess I could have gone to the Enterprise-B’s christening if I had really wanted to. But… I didn’t. I was tired of Starfleet, and, frankly, didn’t want to have to waste my time aboard a ship where we weren’t needed. I resented being put on display.” The doctor hesitated. “I just can’t stop thinking: If I’d gone with him, maybe he wouldn’t have—” “Doctor,” Spock interrupted firmly, “your presence there would have made no difference. The captain would have sent you to sickbay, and he would still have gone to the deflector room. Even had you been with him in the