Beneath the Earth
W e sit closer. His hand is only a
few inches from mine on the grass. He's wearing a golden ring with
that three-headed dog on it, the same snarling beast that guards
his chariot. I want to trace the raised outline.
He still hasn't touched me.
"Why do you come here, really?" I
ask.
"You intrigue me, Persephone."
He seemed to know my name from the start; I
suppose I told it to him. When he says, "Persephone," his deep
voice flows all around me, warm, like a caress.
But do I know his name? No—and what's more,
I haven't even asked him. I've had plenty of chances. Maybe I'm
afraid if I say his name, reality will come crashing into this
dream world where we meet. I'll keep him a dream if it means I can
be with him longer.
There's so much I don't know.
"How far do you travel to get here?" I
ask.
"Oh, a long, long way. It's another world,
really."
"You come from the stars just to visit
me?"
He laughs and his smile is so real, so
alive, I feel like the whole vale is suddenly lit up.
"My home is in the other direction. I come
from down here, beneath the earth." He smooths the long grass with
his fingers, and his voice seems to resonate through the soil and
the rock and the fire beneath the rock at the center of the earth.
I burrow my fingers under the grass, as if I could find the path of
his voice there, among the roots.
He tilts his head, giving me a piercing
look. "What do you think of that?"
"It must be wonderful," I say. "That's where
this all starts growing, after all. Down there in that rich
darkness."
He looks inordinately pleased. "I'm glad to hear that."
His fingers find an errant fold in the cloth
of my chiton and they start to stroke it. Everything tingles—the
air, my skin. I can feel molecules of desire floating around me,
traveling up the threads in the cloth so they hug my whole
body.
"Let me tell you something," he says. "Not
everyone agrees with you about my home. They like this part of
existence: green leaves, fresh petals. But this soil . . ." He
drops the cloth to pull up a handful of earth, letting the moist
black grains sift through his fingers. "This comes from leaves and
trees long past. Everything dies, and dying, returns to earth, air,
water, and fire. To start again. Where I come from."
I want his hand back on my chiton. I want it
to touch me through the cloth.
I try to keep my voice steady. "That's the
problem here. Everything's green, everything's female, everything's
the same. This flower . . ."
I reach out to a stalk leaning toward me and
run a finger across its bulging bud; it's so ripe, the bud splits
at my touch and white petals start to unfold right in front of us
with a burst of perfume. I snap its stem and take a long, deep
breath.
"Funny," I say, "I don't even know its
name."
"Narcissus."
"This narcissus needs the earth below as
much as it needs the sun."
"I was hoping you'd say that," he says,
suddenly all seriousness. There's such a coiled intensity in his
gaze, I have to pull my eyes away. Then, looking only at the
flower, I hold it out to him. He lifts his hand and wraps it around
my hand around the stem. He starts to pull my hand toward him,
starts to pull me toward him—yes, I think, yes—and then he
stops.
"Wait," he whispers, as if to himself. He
unfolds his fingers and gently lifts the flower from my hand. He
puts it inside the drape of his chiton, next to his skin.
"There's something we need to talk about,"
he says. "But I have to leave now. Come back tomorrow." His eyes
are ablaze. "Tell me you'll come."
"Yes. I'll come."
I drag my feet back along the path. I'm as slow and heavy and
full of heat as the olive trees. With every step I play his voice
in my head again, the way fingers keep playing the same tune on the
strings of a lyre. I'm putting his hand on my hand over and over
and over.
Talk? He knows what I want. I want him to
kiss me. Why do we need to talk?
A snake slithers off the path and disappears
under some tree roots.
At least I know something more about him. He
lives underground, so he's probably a river god. I try to picture
his home and I see an echoing cave, dripping with stalactites. I
hear a surging river, as dark as his hair. It might be under my
feet right now.
Roses crowd the path, but I don't smell
them. I smell narcissus.
I bet that three-headed dog roams his lands,
scaring off mortals who sneak in to steal gemstones and fat veins
of gold.
I'll ask him tomorrow. I'll ask him his name.
I drift around the last bend, a boat on the
stream of my thoughts. The lemon trees float into view, and then
the red clay roof tiles, lapping each other like waves, and the
whiteplastered walls, the shutters closed against the
heat.
And my mother, pacing.
Her short, crisp steps block the courtyard
gate. Her arms are crossed as tight as prison walls. She whirls at
the end of a step, and her eyes meet mine.