I completed another half circle around the fire approaching the pair of bodies that always troubled me more than any of the others. The mother and her baby. He would be cradled in the only limb she had left but she would be looking at me, not at him. The torn end of her arm pointed accusingly at me like I’d brought death here. I would move him closer to her and tighten her other arm around him. Then I would turn her head to face him so she wouldn’t worry where he was. There would be no resistance … the bones in her neck were broken.
They waited for me, concealed for now on the other side of a large piece of the plane. I couldn’t tell what part it was. There would be no windows in the outer skin of the piece of wreckage. I knew that before I walked around to see them. For now all I could see were wires and insulation.
I took out a bottle of water. The first mouthful rinsed the dryness before I spat it out, the next I swallowed. I was still holding the bottle in my hand when I stepped around to face them but I froze as I processed what I saw.
Something was out of place. I started walking back, keeping them in sight. I tried to remember the man who was with them but I couldn’t guess where he should be. I hadn’t missed any of the dead and I couldn’t picture him anywhere else. I tried to recall him from all the times I dreamed about being here and came up empty.
He was … undamaged. Unburned. He was on his back, head resting on the dead woman’s stomach, his hands resting on his. His suit was nearly black in the orange light. I circled him slowly to see his face and as it came into view I recognized it. His narrow nose and thin lips. Eyes just a little too close together. He needed to get his head off her. It was so wrong. I had no idea why his men were obvious to me but he was transparent.
I quickly made sure that the handle of my knife was easily accessible through the opening in my bag then I put it on my shoulder, half on backwards so I could get at it quickly. He was maybe fifteen feet away. Too close for my comfort but too far away for Andre’s liking.
“Welcome to my nightmare Damian,” I said, Andre’s eagerness for the knife trembling gently in my left arm.
“Anna …,” he said as the corners of his lips came up. “Nice place you have here.”
“Indeed. I was worried I would go to all this trouble and nobody would show up,” I laughed as I reached into my bag. “Did you come to dance or can I buy you a drink?”
He sat up and looked at me. Then he laughed. “It always makes me feel good to see my ex looking like shit.”
It was true. My shirt was dirty and bloodstained, my leg bound with Bee’s sheets. The cut on it had bled through down to my foot. My bare feet slid in my untied shoes. I didn’t even have pants on.
“A drink it is,” I said as I tossed the other bottle. He caught it and stood up. As he opened it I waved my hand at him to step away from the woman he’d been using as a pillow. He did and drank as he watched me rearrange her body.
“This is going to be too easy,” he said.
“Yes,” Andre agreed. “It is.”
“Let’s walk a bit … I want to watch you weaken before I kill you.”
I smiled over the back pain that ground my tailbone now with every step. “Yes … we don’t want to rush things.” Andre and I agreed on that at least. “I always feel like she’s blaming me for this. None of the others do … but she does.”
Damian lit two cigarettes and offered me one, holding it at arms length. I approached and took it before backing away. He waited to see which way I was going and followed me at a distance.
“So I heard a few days ago you made your way home,” he said. He held his cigarette in his mouth letting it waggle when he spoke, keeping his hands free. His lips sealed around it and the tip brightened, then two lines of smoke lightly streamed from his nose.
“Those four shouldn’t have had any trouble from that big idiot Martin and the old fossil you keep upstairs … but then her phone lit up,” he sighed. “If you need something done right …”
I thought a moment then laughed as I exhaled.
“I’m always impressed how easily your men are swayed from duty,” I told him. “Five grand a piece: barely a dent in my pocketbook.”
His eyes narrowed as he laughed at me.
“But then your man you lost in Calgary was way off course when I found him. So easily distracted when they’re not hanging off your apron.”
“Bitch,” Damian muttered as he lit himself another smoke. Didn’t offer me one.
I kept to my route through the debris. Nothing else was out of place. Damian kept his distance, flanking me when there was room, falling behind when there wasn’t. Arrogant ass. I could keep him talking until the baby fell out and we both missed our chance. The contractions kept coming. He discretely checked his watch with each one.
“So how is Alina?” I asked him. I knew already but I needed a fresh topic to keep his mouth running.
“I decided we needed some time apart,” he said. “She wouldn’t shut up about feelings and marriage. She needs some time alone … to think about her place in the big picture. Like you did Catherine.”
“You missed a few spots when you said good-bye,” I told him but he ignored me.
I added revenge for putting his fists on my sister to the list of reasons he would die. Put it right at the top. He smiled, confident in his plan to tire me out.
“Marriage,” he laughed. “Not how I roll. Catering to a woman. She needs even more discipline than a soldier. Your Richards will never lead. You’ve made him as weak as you are.”
“If you were half the man my Richards is I would have died in the compound months ago,” I told him.
“We disagree,” he shrugged. He laughed as anger flashed on his face.
Yes, Andre thought. Andre was getting stronger in me. Demanding his shot. I would have to give in to him soon. Very soon.
Damian checked his watch again as I stopped. Coward, Andre and I thought. Waiting until labour had gone so far that I had maybe half a minute between contractions. I couldn’t let it go that long. I was only managing thirty or so slow steps between the contractions now anyway. Time was getting short.
“Rex … I think it’s time for that dance I promised you,” I told him. He could keep walking but if he walked away now he wouldn’t get his chance if he left me behind. I was calling the ball here. Now.
He stopped and turned to me. I carefully took the knife out and dropped the bag on the ground. Andre was confident but I was scared I had let Damian drag this on too long. I breathed through another contraction. Small moans escaped past my lips every time I exhaled. My knees trembled as my resolve started to fail.
“Yes,” Damian said, crushing yet another cigarette out under his foot. “There is no more pleasure in watching you pant your weak ass around in the dirt.” He took off his side arm and tossed it aside. Then he drew his knife.
“Remember this Damian?” I said as I held mine up. Its delicate guard sparkled in the flames just as Catherine remembered.
“I’ll be taking it back after I cut that bastard out of you with it,” he laughed again.
Movement behind him caught my eye. At first I thought it was just the hot air distorting burning wreckage but as I kept my eyes on Damian I realized it was a man, taking a few silent steps closer to us. Maybe a survivor or another of his men. That figured. The coward would bring backup.
Damian looked down at his knife, running his fingertips along the edge of his blade, satisfying himself that it was sharp and deadly. I risked a quick glance at the man only a dozen feet behind him. My heart sunk; it was Paul. I couldn’t read him like I couldn’t read Damian. He put his finger to his lips and took another step and stopped, watching me.
No, I thought. No … you were supposed to stay away. You were supposed to let me do this.
Then Pilot’s words came to me. Perhaps she could send someone away, he had said.
If you won’t stay away Paul I’ll send you away. I thought of our daughter waking up alone by the pond. I started to set my focus as pressure built in my hand. She would wake up with her father. Then I channelled the force of the next contraction into my hand. The blue glow that filled it fought the orange light in the air.
I took a couple of steps to the right circling Damian, Andre’s fingers twitching on the handle of the knife, my fingers twitching with the blue arcs that circled around into the back of my hand. Damian glanced indifferently at my light show. Paul circled him in the same direction. Damn, I couldn’t get a clean shot to him. The next contraction brought me to my knees. Damian laughed as I kept my eyes on him, still so pleased with himself like he’d had anything to do with me being in labour now. Paul took another step toward him, his hands out to me.
As I waited to stand up I decided I would move quickly to the side and discharge the energy in my hand past Damian into Paul, sending him away, but as I started to get back on my feet the baby kicked hard, triggering another massive contraction to roll right in on top of the one that was still fading.
NO!
I dropped back to my knees, then to all fours, keeping my head up as I panted. Damian took a few steps toward me, Paul matching behind. Damian’s laughter sounding flat in the hot air. He was enjoying himself, taking his time.
NO!
Her connection to Paul fought me.
Your mistake, it said.
God, she was right. She told me they never found him and it was my fault. He had interfered but the screw up was completely mine. Maybe I needed my energy to jump fighting Damian alone … and with it almost gone by sending Paul away Damian had been able to fatally wound me before I killed him and got home.
Damian was still closing the gap to me as Paul closed the gap to him. I picked the knife back up and got up on my feet then I started walking backward as the two of them approached me. I wouldn’t have long before the pain froze me again and hoped Andre could push me past it.
“Damian … my love,” I cooed to him. “How long has it been since you had me?”
A low growl started in the back of his throat. I knew Paul could hear me but I didn’t break my eye contact with Damian. Paul would know what I was doing. Distracting him. Keeping him focused on me.
“More than two hundred years,” I said as softly as I could without my voice being lost in the muted roar of the fire around us. “I can see the frustration in your face. The tension you think exists between us … the attraction … too bad it’s one sided. But then you’ve always been a lousy lover … no wonder you have to take it.”
Andre held the knife loosely, patiently, he would only need a moment and he could wait a little longer. He’d waited seventy years already.
“You always were a shitty leader Rex … you were then, you are now,” Andre goaded him.
“Coward,” we said together.
Rage filled Damian’s face. His lips curling back to show his teeth. He would strike at me as soon as he got close enough expecting to sink it in deep right away. He was like a mugger on the street. Expecting fear and submission like he had seen from Catherine. Not resistance and attack. I held my arms out to my sides, appearing inexperienced and defenceless. He put his arms out like mine. Overconfident ass. He had no idea what was coming.
“Coward … coward,” I was singing to him but another contraction was starting so I stopped and took a step toward him as Paul finished closing the gap.
Another step and Paul had him from behind. Immobilized. Damian’s face filled with surprise. He roared at Paul as he struggled. I whispered as I tried to blow through the contraction and forced myself to take my last two steps to him as the pain in my stomach grew and tried to freeze my legs. His head flew back into Paul’s and they staggered back together a step. Blood burst from his cheek bone and I jumped from the sound from the impact.
Paul’s grip slipped and Damian got an arm loose allowing him to turn on him. Paul quickly released his other arm as Damian pulled it free, before the knife in his hand could slash his arm on its way by.
They circled each other. Damian armed, Paul not. Damian getting closer and Paul backing up to stay out of his reach blinking to clear his watering eyes.
“I’ve won Richards,” Damian taunted. “Surrender. I’ll make it quick.”
Paul didn’t reply. He watched Damian closely as he kept glancing at me. Damn it Paul, I thought, pay attention. Look after yourself.
“She’s soft … so easy to hurt. But she’ll take so much without complaint,” he goaded. “I remember what it felt like, to have her want me. She’s so trusting, loyal … the look on her face as I put her in her place. Holding her down, making her submit, watching my fingers sink in to her throat.”
“It was so satisfying when she finally started begging … bleeding … when I cut your stink from her. Made her watch.”
Paul brought his hands up and took a half step forward. He wanted Damian, badly, but he held back.
“Yet again, your happy little family in a little dead heap at my feet.”
Damian laughed as he made his move and when Paul committed to blocking he dodged the other way and swung the knife at his undefended side. Damian was fast with the overconfidence that being armed gave him. Paul was deliberate with caution. He only had his hands.
Without thinking I disappeared, reappearing almost on top of Damian as the contraction released me. Everything slowed down and I was distracted by the horrible feeling that what my daughter said was coming true anyway. Unavoidable. I had intended to appear with my knife already in his back but I was up against him, knocking the swing of his knife hand off course and away from Paul, slashing Damian’s side.
Damian shouted with pain and turned on me, the greater threat slashing at my bound arm tearing the cloth open and digging in to my skin below. I lashed back catching the inside of his arm before I backed up a couple of steps hoping to lead him away but Damian backed away from both of us.
“You know how I know you’re crazy, you stupid bitch?” he spat at me as he kept going.
Paul wouldn’t look at me as he tried to get between Damian and I … I kept moving to the left so he couldn’t, my hand clutching my freshly cut left arm. I could feel the tingle of the blue light entering my body through the wound.
Damian’s backward pace quickened as he moved his knife to his left hand, then he held up his right and filled it with blue light like mine. Little tendrils of blue lightning reached toward us as he sneered. I went right, passing behind Paul who was still going left, trying to stay between us.
Then Damian’s hand appeared on fire, with blue lightning that seemed to drip from it to the ground. It hissed, a soft roar like a blow torch and as the breeze shifted toward me I could finally pick up Damian’s stink under my nose. I put my hand over my face to try and keep it out. Damian swung his hand in a slow circle, making the light follow in a bright rope trick. Paul looked over his left shoulder to make sure he knew where I was but I’d moved and as he took a step back and looked over his right Damian brought his hand up. He said something to Paul, too softly for me to make out as he snapped his light forward. I was looking at Paul’s eyes as the blue fingers wrapped his body for a second then there was a soft pop as the air rushed in to the space he’d been in.
Paul was gone.
“God damn you!” I yelled as Damian backed away laughing. He gave me the finger as he disappeared into the wreckage. I sank to the ground, clutching my chest, watching the place where I’d last seen Paul. Trying to feel him. I could but it was so faint. Damian had done what I hadn’t. Sent Paul away and there was nothing I could do to get him back now. My energy was intact … or maybe this was how things were supposed to turn out. Damian making Paul disappear and me pissing my energy away fighting him. Then my hands to my belly as the pain started again.
The least I could do now was make it home in better shape. I could survive. But not bound to the ground like this. As I rode the contraction I let my blue light explore it. I wanted to soften the pain, slow the labour. Not for long, maybe twenty minutes. Maybe half an hour. Just long enough to finish that son of a bitch. As the pain faded I let my light into me. Immediately my stomach softened and the pain disappeared. I could feel the baby still, she was okay and I carefully stood.
Damian’s handgun was still on the ground nearby so I took it. It was loaded so I made sure the safety was on and put it in my pack with mine. I wasn’t going to leave it for him to retrieve. I was certain that he’d want to finish me with something slow and personal anyway. Like I wanted to finish him.
I waited another minute as I checked my cut arm. The new wound was deeper than the one the remains of the bandage covered but it barely oozed. I took a deep breath. No pain, no tightness in my belly. Whatever I’d done was working. Paul was still connected to me, barely, but enough to know wherever he was he was alive. I tried to sense Damian but his smell disappeared with Paul. I felt completely alone here again. The way it was supposed to be but that meant I had to hunt him blind.
As I took a few steps toward the gap in the wreckage Damian had passed through there was a new sound. A distraught, choking scream, like the throat that made it wasn’t working right. I paused and turned my head to try and make it out but the more clear it became the more I didn’t want to find out.
“Brandon …”
A woman’s voice. More screaming, then again.
“Brandon …”
Then from another direction, a baby crying. My mind imagined what he had done. I tried to think although my own grief over losing Paul didn’t want me to give a shit. They were dead, broken, jump started back to something like life by the man who saw me care about them. I’d looked after them for years, every time my dream brought me here. Never failed to make sure they were close.
I kept my pack over my shoulder, my knife in my hand. The opening still in front of me so the gun was easy to get to. Then I turned and hurried to the mother hoping Damian would think I’d be drawn to little Brandon. As I spotted her I felt a small contraction but nothing like the heavy labour I’d been carrying with me. I crouched down and watched her. She appeared to be alone, fighting to push herself up. There was no expression on her face but the screaming continued. I put my hands on my ears and looked around behind me to make sure that I was alone before I got up to go look for her baby.
As I got further from her I could make out his little cry again. It was the same wail, over and over. Like his mother’s; three plain screams then a Brandon. They weren’t alive; they were only doing what Damian made them do. Even though they were dead I had to put them back the way they were. What he had done to them was disgusting.
I circled around the middle of the debris trying to keep the same distance from the baby for a while before I approached. He was moving, his cries not coming from the same place twice. It only took a minute for him to stay put. I could barely hear his mother but Brandon’s rhythmic wailing continued, no longer pacing me through the wreckage.
When I was closer I peered past a piece of the plane’s tail section. Damian’s back was to me, something cradled in his arms. My nose wrinkled as I glared at him then his hands dropped to his sides, the baby dangling from one of them by his ankle, the pace of his cries unbroken. Damian dropped him to the ground and turned slowly as I pulled back out of sight.
“I can smell that disgusting offspring inside you … couldn’t resist coming for this one, could you?”
I heard him draw in a lung full of air past his nose.
“What makes you weak makes me strong,” Damian laughed and I heard his foot drag on the ground. Brandon’s cries became louder, like his head had turned toward me. “Yours will be even more fun to play with.”
I could kill him here; take the baby to his mother. I took a step further back, waiting to see what he would do.
“Yes,” Damian’s voice, closer now, “I smell you there. Hiding like a child.”
I backed away a few more steps, around the piece of tail. Brandon continued to sound off like a car alarm and Damian had gone silent. A quick glance over my shoulder to make sure he hadn’t gone around then as I turned back his hand was on my throat, his other on my wrist controlling the knife.
“Stupid bitch,” he worked his mouth for a moment. I tried to turn away knowing what was coming but he held me still. Spit hit me in the eye and down my cheek as I struggled. Another small contraction reminded me to hurry.
“Coward,” I choked out at him as his grip on my neck tightened. I kept fighting him, distracting him as my free hand went in my pack and took his gun. “Chicken shit coward,” I spat back as the safety came off.
I wanted nothing more than to fill him with metal from his own gun but I could feel Andre in me, angry that I would deny him his chance. Reminding me it had to be the knife. I pushed myself toward Damian and pressed his gun to his thigh as I pulled the trigger. His hands let me go as I put another round in almost the same place then I went past him as he fell sideways into the tail clutching his leg and swearing at me.
As soon as I was out of his reach I put the gun away and went to Brandon. Wiped the spit on my sleeve and got down to the ground to pick him up. When I looked back Damian was hobbling after me, one hand on his leg, the other held his knife. I couldn’t imagine being on my feet after that. There was blood but not enough to worry about him losing it too quickly.
Quick as I could I started to the baby’s mother led by her screams. I’d gotten some distance on Damian but he was still after me. I put my hand on the baby’s chest and thought about quieting him. My hand filled with a bit of light and I let it find its way around inside him as I hurried. Just stop what Damian did, I thought and when the light stopped searching I let it into Brandon. He pulled in one last lung full of air and instead of crying he simply exhaled and was still again. I put my lips to his little head.
“I’m so sorry about the bad man,” I whispered. “He’ll pay for it.”
As I took my last steps to the mother I prepared for quieting her. I tried to wrap her arm around him but she kept squirming, unaware that he was near. My hand went to her chest and as I watched Damian get closer my light explored, learning what he had done to her, until it was ready and I let it loose. She fell still and I put Brandon back in the crook of her arm and turned her head back to face him. I brushed her hair from her face and kissed his again. Then I stood as another small contraction came, stronger than the last few. Whatever I’d done to calm them was wearing off.
Damian was thirty feet away, still coming for me.
“You’re going to be alive when I take him out of you … his screams will be real …” Damian’s rage in every syllable.
I didn’t reply as I stepped away from Brandon and his mother, leading Damian away with me, giving me time to decide on how to attack him before he forced me into reacting.
“That bitch Alina came home … so happy … imagine the surprise on her face after weeks of telling her how much I wanted it. She said, ‘my sweet Damian … we’re expecting.’ My fucking Lord, she brought me flowers! I one punched her in the head, right on to her annoying little ass.”
Damian laughed, his face contorting in pain every time he had to use his shot up leg. I’d seen the damage first hand, over and over. His horrible bragging couldn’t upset me any more than I had been already the past couple of months.
“She didn’t beg for me to stop until I was on top of her, sinking my teeth in. ‘Is this how I filled you up?’ I asked her, ‘What’s the matter, why don’t you like it now?’”
The more he talked the more I wanted his end to last and last. I still had his gun. I could shoot him in the other leg, get him on the ground. Or I could paralyse him like I’d done to Paul. Keep him from hurting me as he felt everything. Another contraction came, longer and more painful than the last. I realized that I would have to do something soon.
I tucked my knife in the back of my underwear as I kept my distance from Damian, handle tilted to the left so I could grab it.
“Do you make the same noises she does when the pain is too much?” Damian asked me. “So much like the ones that came out when I made the earth move underneath her.” His hand had moved to the front of his pants grabbing himself, excitement on his face when he wasn’t wincing with pain.
I led him through the wreckage another half minute, getting more and more angry at him, before I paused and brought his gun up, aiming at his right knee. He was still thirty feet away, his right hand flashing with blue and going out, pressing it to the wounds on his leg. He’d used it all up on Paul and the woman and her baby.
“Shit, really? You almost missed from right on top of me! Stupid cow, you can’t hit it from there.”
I thought about it.
“You’re right,” I yelled back as I stopped and lifted the gun before I pulled the trigger and sunk a round deep into his right shoulder. Into the little soft spot just under the end of his collar bone.
“That’s for biting my sister …” I whispered.
Then as he went down I shattered the knee of his good leg.
“Bitch!” he screamed back.
I went to him, slowing as my stomach tightened. Not enough to stop me but the next one would. That I was sure of. His knife was still in his right hand as he tried to push himself up so I aimed at it and squeezed the trigger. His two smallest fingers disappeared as well as a piece of his palm leaving him with the one good limb Brandon’s poor mother had.
“Sweet, sweet irony,” I breathed to myself against the train of angry bitches rolling from his mouth.
“Ready Andre?” I said out loud as I backhanded the butt of the gun that he’d hit my sister with hard into his face. Then I dropped on his one good limb. My knee sinking into the nerves inside his upper arm.
“Weak, impotent, coward,” I whispered to him as he screamed at me.
I tossed the gun aside out of Damian’s reach as Andre reached behind me for my knife. Pain was returning hard and fast to my stomach and if Damian pushed me off him I’d be in trouble. He’d still be stronger with one good arm than I would be frozen by a contraction.
Andre pressed the tip of the knife to Damian’s chest, his left palm on the end of the handle, his right hand gripping it, fingers curled around under the delicate gold guard. He moaned through his teeth as his two fingered right came up and clutched my throat, digging in deeply, the pressure of his effort pushing his hot blood out and on to me. I felt it start to run down inside my torn shirt.
“You’re the only man I’ve met whose worse than me,” Andre said from my lips as he pushed me up on my knees and used my weight to force the blade in as I pressed my neck deeper into Damian’s hand. My lips pulled back and my teeth ground together as the small vibrations of his body tearing inside were transmitted through the handle up into my palms. I watched Damian’s eyes open wide and his body go stiff as the blade pushed up into his chest and into his heart. Damian’s grip on me weakened, his fingers scrambling to keep their purchase. Andre turned it hard and quickly pulled it out then jammed it deeply into his left shoulder.
“Where did you send Paul?” I growled as I twisted the blade in him.
Damian was breathing hard as his blood soaked my shirt, bubbling from the hole in his chest.
“Don’t know … don’t care …” he grunted.
Andre’s work was done and I could feel him start to fade from me.
“Didn’t need you as much as I thought …” I whispered.
Damian’s struggles under me softened with the contraction and his hand fell from my throat. I put my right hand on his chest feeling him fight to breathe as the flow of blood leaving his body slowed. I held a charge of blue energy in my palm and waited.
His pulse weakened as his damaged heart faltered. He looked up at me, the anger on his face replaced with a mocking smile.
“I’ll see you again bitch,” he managed with the last full lung of air he would draw in on his own. His breath started to hitch in his chest as his diaphragm tried to sustain him. I put my leg over him, straddling his body as I moved to his other side.
“Sshhh,” I told him. “Sshhh. Let me help.” I held Damian’s nose shut and sealed my mouth over his then I blew and filled his lungs with my air as his heart stuttered. As it stopped I pushed the blue light into his chest, capturing the future end of his long life line where I had cut it before it could go free, holding on to it tightly.
I took my air back, filling my lungs with it, pulling the line into me. It found its way down in to my chest along with mine and the baby’s. I held my breath, feeling it shift and move as it aligned itself with my own. I quickly thought which of my gifts I could tie down with it. Which would help the most. The family had plenty of fighters. Traveling only helped me. But reading the family would help everyone as we regained all that Damian had taken. I held that gift to Damian’s line in my chest as it found its place and bound it self to me.
It was only then that I took my lips off his and pushed myself away.
“Your gift is mine now.” I whispered to his empty body. I fell over as another contraction hit, landing on my side on a mat of scorched grass.
The next few contractions were agony, catching up on the work they’d missed when I stalled the labour. I dug my nails into the ground beneath me and screamed through them, in too much pain to breathe properly. I tried to relax in between, listening to the quiet sounds the flames made, the soft ticks the cooling metal made but they followed each other quickly. I knew I had to find the strength to get up on my feet. To try and walk out. I’d been in the wreckage for a couple of hours and nobody had come looking for survivors. It would be up to me to make it a few blocks. I hoped that help would be that close. Maybe I could get to my car, get it started, try to jump to Paul before the baby came … then get him home with me. I knew in my heart it wouldn’t happen but maybe I could get to the hospital.
When I felt I had control of the contractions again I pushed myself up and got Damian’s knife before I stood and walked around him for his gun. Both went in my pack then I held him down with my foot to pull out my knife but it came out easily, maybe because I’d been twisting it. I wiped most of his blood from the blade onto my sleeve before it went in to my bag. The Colonel said it was a gift but I still might have to return it. I had a cigarette at my lips and my lighter out as I breathed through another one.
As it passed I sparked the lighter to it.
“Andre? Why are you still here?” I yelled. If I wanted a cigarette it meant he wasn’t gone. I pulled smoke deep into my lungs once. Then again. I was supposed to be free of him now. But I could still feel him.
“Andre?” I yelled again. “It’s over … I want my head back!”
The tears that ran down my face now weren’t dried instantly in the heat. I had another drag as I got my bearings. Home was a block and a half away, the fastest path would lead me past Brandon and his mother. I knew every bit of this place as well as I knew my own face.
After the pain had come and gone again I turned toward home and took a few steps, looking at Damian on the ground as I went around him to make sure I didn’t trip. When I looked up I was facing a man. A vision of Paul, just ten feet away staring back at me.
“No … You’re not here … He sent you away …” I said as I realized that sanity could still be a long way off.
The vision didn’t move. My hands shook as I took another cigarette from my bag and lit it, only then realizing that I still had half of one in my hand. After a bit of indecision I kept the new one and let the old one drop to the ground. Andre was sick, sticking around to torment me now with hallucinations.
“You’re not here … not here …” I breathed as it watched me through another contraction.
“Andre?” I yelled, sobbing, sending my anguish into the sky. “Is this because I didn’t need you after all? He’s gone … Damian sent him away. Take this from my sight!”
The vision stepped closer as I put the smoke to my lips again.
“Not here … not here …” I murmured as I exhaled.
When he got to me he took the cigarette and put it on the ground. He looked back at me. Angry. Pained. My mind putting everything I expected Paul to feel onto his face. His hand touched my cheek and went around behind my head. His fingers gently grasped my hair as his other rested on my huge stomach.
“I’m here,” the vision whispered. “He sent me away, said I could come back when it was over … then I was with her at the pond. We talked a while … until I came back here and heard you screaming.”
He let go of my hair and put his hand on my chest.
“Feel me here … I’m real,” he said then his hand went back up to hold my head again.
I tried to put the cigarette to my mouth again but it was gone so I reached in my bag to get another.
“Here …” he said as he took my hand and put it on my chest.
Another contraction started to take hold and I put my hands on my stomach as my eyes rolled back and my lids closed, my head resting over on his arm. I could feel his fingers on my cheek but they were gone when the pain let go and I could open my eyes.
“It’s a trick,” I whispered, feeling my connection to Paul in my chest again. Hating Andre even more.
“No trick,” he said as he leaned closer, putting his lips near mine for a few seconds before pulling back. I followed with my nose picking up the smell of sweet grass and wildflowers mixed with the scent of Paul.
“No trick,” I whispered. He was really here. I wasn’t sure what would have been easier. Ignoring the vision until I got away from this place or facing Paul and getting out of here together. Pain was still in his eyes, it hadn’t let go one bit since I noticed him.
“Did you follow my screams to kill me Paul?” I asked. “You could have walked away.”
He didn’t answer. Anger replaced the pain in his eyes as his fingers worked their way further into my hair. Not painfully, but firmly enough to let me know that he was in control of whatever happened next. Whatever he was going to do I wanted him to get on with it. If we were going home we needed to hurry.
“She’s coming soon … take her Paul. I won’t fight what I’ve got coming to me.”
Paul frowned, his bottom lip pushing up into his top one then he pushed up my sleeve to see my makeshift dressing. He leaned to the side to look at my leg.
“Did he hurt you?” he asked while he looked at what I’d done to Damian.
I nodded.
“This is where you listen to me Anna,” he said. He was dead serious and sounded like he didn’t have an ounce of patience in his entire body.
I nodded in reply.
“I was on the phone with Ray when you called him … he tied me in and I heard everything. And again when he got through to you later. I’m sorry about Bee and Denis. I’m sorry I wasn’t there. That was how you wanted it. I know why you did what you did. You weren’t yourself. I haven’t seen the Anna I fell in love with in a long time. I thought about getting out of your life for good this time. Just one swing at you would free me. Ray told me why you did it but I didn’t believe him until I heard you say it tonight. I was close … Denis called me a week ago when you showed up at your place so I flew to Vancouver. Then when you called Ray tonight I came straight over. I was watching the house when the plane came down. I followed you; watching you with him until you got the knives out.”
Another contraction had stopped, but I only nodded.
“I didn’t know if you could do it or not … I stepped in anyway.”
“I almost sent you away,” I whispered. “I wouldn’t have had the energy to fight alone if I had … she stopped me … he sent you where I was going to, used most of his to do it …”
“I told you to be quiet,” he said. “Just nod … is it over now?”
I nodded.
As the pain returned again I felt something pop low inside me and water started to leak out down my legs. I looked into his eyes this time as I breathed and more came out.
“Paul,” I managed as it faded. He didn’t answer right away. I could see his mind working, deciding.
“I said be quiet. Where is Andre now?”
I could see Andre behind Paul as the pain returned again. His presence could only mean I was still crazy. There was nothing I could do about that now. I was breathing hard so I raised my right hand to point behind Paul but he grabbed my wrist and held it tightening his grip on my hair at the same time. I didn’t blame him for being wary of that hand.
“I’m here, behind you Captain,” Andre said, his words in my ears and not just in my mind. Paul’s grip on me relaxed for a split second. He’d heard it too. Then he let go of my head and slowly turned. When he saw Andre he put himself between us, letting me go.
“I wanted to say goodbye. Pilot has freed me … I don’t need her anymore.”
I wanted to pick up my knife and stick it in Andre now. All the pain and manipulation. I could see it now for what it was. The woman who had left him for his brother had chosen wisely if that was the kind of lover Andre had always been.
“I think you’re right about that Anna,” he said.
“Andre,” Paul whispered.
He nodded. Fire light made his bent glasses sparkle and turned his dirty uniform gold. His attention went to me as he spoke.
“You did need me Anna,” he said with distaste. “You were so ready to give up at your sister’s, just a frightened little child. Refusing to do your part unless you were certain you could still whisper dirty things to him in the dark when it was all over.”
Andre made a face and leaned his head toward Paul. Paul stiffened with anger so I took his elbow and held it.
“I made you keep it together. You should be thanking me, not cursing me.”
“Bastard,” I breathed in pain, my arms still locked around Paul’s.
“Pilot didn’t tell you why Damian was incurable, did he?”
“No,” I whispered.
Andre laughed.
“Pilot’s father was incurably insane … he fucked up his own brother to be the cure. Just like he did to you. He picked his weakest brother, just in case it went wrong. Damian failed, cursed forever with someone like me always whispering in his ear. Pilot got it right the second time, sending his other brother to do the job. Then he made you to deal with his mistake. Only a lunatic could sever the line from another.
“If we failed there wouldn’t be another chance next time around. We’d be stuck with each other waiting for the cure.”
“What I did to you,” Andre said, “you brought on yourself.”
I let go of Paul and took a step back as he took a step toward Andre. Andre didn’t move. He knew what was coming. Paul’s right hand stretched wide open then his fingers came together, pushing off each other until he was satisfied with their positions. He held his left up to guard as he swung his right up and around hard, connecting with Andre’s jaw and throwing him back almost off his feet. There was the crack of bone and a puff of dust where Andre’s face should have bled if his dried out skin could split.
“That’s for putting your hands on my wife, asshole.” Paul breathed.
Amen, I thought.
Paul kept his hands up ready to give Andre another but Andre only nodded to Paul. I knew what he was thinking. It was honourable to take the punch because he’d given attention to another man’s property. Attention he thought would be acceptable if I was his. After a few seconds his body seemed lit by dull flames then I realized the flames were behind him growing brighter. He faded. When he was nearly gone he turned and walked away. After a few steps he disappeared completely as another contraction released me.
Paul still stood with his back to me as he spoke.
“Watching you tonight is the hardest thing I have ever done. What do you say when sorry isn’t enough, Anna?”
“Forgive me Paul,” I whispered. “Please forgive me.”
He turned to me and held my face in his hands, putting his cheek on mine.
“Is he gone now?”
“Yes …” I breathed in his ear. I could hear him breathing with me, gently.
“We do everything together from now on. Got it?”
I nodded and pulled out his ring from under my shirt. I held it in my fist for a moment then I opened my hand. He struggled with the clasp behind but couldn’t get it, wincing as he tried. His hand was swelling, Andre’s dust mixing with the blood from his cut knuckle. I opened the necklace to take his ring off it and pushed it back on his finger. Then I fastened it back up around my neck. As I did I felt the baby’s line start to shift in my chest. We were running out of time.
I closed my eyes as he kissed me.
“I love you more than anything,” I whispered.
“I didn’t tell you to talk,” he whispered back as he kissed me again.
“Paul,” I said as I pulled away.
“I love you more than anything too,” he said as he tried to pull me in again.
“Paul,” I said. “My water broke and her line is loosening … we have to go.”
“You’re right … we’ve been here too long.”
He took my bag and put it over his shoulder but we only got a few steps before labour stuck my feet to the ground. I leaned my head on his chest, turning my neck and rocking my forehead on him as he checked his watch. His other hand reached around and rubbed my back.
“A minute and a half,” he said.
“Was that all?” He could have said forever and wouldn’t have been far off. We didn’t get far before another one started.
“Half a minute in between. I have to get you to the hospital now.”
“No,” I said when I could talk again. “Home … hospital will be swamped.”
He gave me his phone and picked me up, my legs over his right forearm so he didn’t have to grip my ribs with his broken hand.
“We’ll never get there with you on foot,” he said. “Call Ray.”
We weren’t far from my house. The phone should have worked but it said No Signal. Then Searching. Then No Signal. This was like at Pilot’s. As we got closer to my house I could make out the sounds of the engines and blue and red lights. Voices. Bars lit up on the phone. The houses that had only been burning when I set off down the alley were almost gone. The orange had faded from the sky and the clouds had quieted. There were no stars, just a flat ceiling of dark gray from the city lights below.
“Where were they all this time?” Paul wondered.
“No,” I shook my head during a break in the pain. “The question is where were we.”
As we crossed the street half a block from my house a fireman approached us with a blanket, the first person I’d seen other than Paul and Damian in hours.
“My wife’s in labour,” Paul explained. “I’ll take her myself … you folks have a lot on your hands.”
He noticed the blood on me.
“Which house did you come from?” he asked as he put the blanket over me. It was cold now that we were away from the fading fire; Paul’s body shielded me from the weak heat still radiating from the flames behind him.
“Back that way,” Paul said tilting his head to the left as he kept walking.
“Anyone else hurt there?”
“No.”
“Congratulations,” he said and disappeared.
There wasn’t much left of my house when we got to it.
“After the plane came down I pulled Denis out to the lawn … out of the fire. The Colonel will take care of him. The house was going up fast.”
I started to cry again.
“Sshhh,” he said. “It’s not goodbye.”
I dialled Ray when the next contraction went away. By then Paul had put me in the car. I was surprised he still had his key. If he hadn’t come back I would have had to break in and crack the ignition to get home. Other than some embers sizzling on the vinyl roof and some bubbles in the paint it looked okay. The wind pulling toward the fire had drawn the flames away from it.
“Paul?” Ray picked up right away. “What’s going on?”
“Ray?” I said.
“Anna? What?”
Paul took the phone from me as I lost the ability to speak again.
“We’re coming Ray,” he said. He had started the Lincoln and was racing up to the highway. “Yes, it’s over. She did it … as soon as she can jump.”
He was listening to Ray.
“Her water broke and she says she can feel the baby’s line loosening.”
Another pause.
“Minute and a half … thirty second breaks,” he listened. “Thanks Ray.”
“He’s ready … we just have to get there.”
I closed my eyes and concentrated. It was a good distraction from the pain I was in and I quickly focused on home. Paul didn’t comment this time as he struggled to keep us on the road. He had taken a right onto the highway rather than waiting for the lights to go south. I could hear him sigh with relief when the gusts moved behind us.
“When I say so close your eyes and step on it,” I told him.
“Me?” he asked.
“Yes … I’m not moving,” I waited until there was a straight stretch of highway in front of us. The pressure was getting strong.
“Anna,” he whispered. “Use me to get us home.”
I shook my head.
“Please,” he insisted. “She’ll need you more … you’ll be down for a couple of days. Me a lot less.”
Paul reached his hand to me.
“Please,” he said again. “Whatever you need is yours.”
I took his hand and breathed through a strong one, feeling deep low pressure, wanting to push. When it passed I quickly checked my focus and felt Paul’s energy in my hand. Just enough to recharge and get home, I thought, just enough. I didn’t want to be without Paul again any longer than I had to.
We were pushed from behind again.
“Ready?” I asked.
“Yes.”
I quickly checked my focus one last time and closed my eyes.
“Home,” I said.
A moment later the car leaped.