19
THE END OF THE STORY
After three months, Steven’s new office still had an unfinished feel to it. The waiting room still bore the sharp smell of fresh paint and carpeting, and the walls were bare except for a single framed print of a dancer in an impossibly bendy position. Hard to tell whether this was meant to soothe, inspire, or taunt his patients.
“Would you like to speak to your brother?” Emily asked her.
“We’re supposed to have lunch today.”
“Dr. Oliver didn’t tell me that. We’re rather busy.” When Grace glanced around the deserted waiting room, Emily looked at her with long-practiced patience. “He’s in with his last morning patient now. Naturally I’ve blocked out the schedule for his lunch, but he only has thirty minutes.”
“I’ll try not to keep him late.”
“Dr. Oliver’s next appointment is at one.”
“Do you always call him Dr. Oliver?” Grace asked her.
“Of course,” Emily said.
“Never Steven?”
“No.” Two red stains appeared in Emily’s cheeks, but Grace couldn’t tell if she was embarrassed or offended.
“Emily, how would you like to come to my father’s house for Thanksgiving?”
Emily flinched a little. “I couldn’t intrude.”
“An invited guest isn’t an intrusion.” Grace laughed. “Unless your name is Uncle Truman.”
Emily’s blank stare sobered her, however, and Grace remembered Lou saying that he wanted the holiday just to be close friends and family. So maybe he would consider Emily an intruder. Then again, with her history littered with unhappy foster homes and group houses, if Emily didn’t intrude on someone sometime, she would never get anywhere. Besides, she’d worked with Steven forever. That had to qualify her as a close . . . something.
“I appreciate the offer. . . .”
“It’s more than an offer. I want you to be there.”
Emily smiled so politely, it was maddening. The woman was a tough nut to crack. “If you’ll just take a seat, I’ll let Dr. Oliver know you’re here the moment he is free.”
It was twelve-thirty by the time that moment occurred. Grace was surprised Emily didn’t drag the poor patient out bodily for this incursion on her carefully planned schedule. Steven came out, looking a bit harried himself. “We can grab a sandwich next door,” he told Grace.
“I invited Emily over for Thanksgiving,” she told him as they were in line to place their orders.
Steven frowned. “Why?”
She gave him a quick whack on the arm. “To be polite.”
“What did she say?”
“She said no, but I want you to work on her. Make her change her mind.”
“If she doesn’t want to go . . .”
“She will, if you second the invitation.”
“You mean if she’s coerced?” He extracted a little bottle of orange juice from a hill of chipped ice. “I’ve worked with Emily for years, Grace. She’s the best admin worker I’ve ever come across—I’d be at sea without her. I don’t want to upset her by forcing her into awkward social situations.”
“Trust me, she’s not going to quit over a meal at our house. Our family isn’t that bad, is it?”
He darted a quick look at her and then placed his order.
When they were settled at a table, she decided she might as well plunge in with the plans she was making. Emily’s clock was ticking away. “I’m leaving after Thanksgiving,” she told him. “Back to Portland.”
“That’s good.”
“So I was looking at your room the other day. We could get it painted and fixed up a little. Also, I should start looking for someone who could come in during the day.”
His smile collapsed. “To tell the truth, I’ve decided against that.”
“The home help? What else can we—”
“No, I mean I’ve decided against moving back home. I don’t think that would work. It might sound selfish, after you’ve been here all these months, but I’m not sure that I would want to be pushing forty and living with my dad. It’s not as if I’m looking to get married again—obviously, I’m not even divorced—but I don’t quite want to give up the idea of any kind of social life in the future. And a man living with his father . . .”
Grace nodded. What he said made sense. It would be a little Sanford and Sonish. “We should be looking for a full-time person, then. Live-in, too.”
Something rumbled inside her just to think the words, much less say them. Their father would never go for this, even if they could find someone. But she couldn’t force Steven to move home against his will.
“I’ll ask around,” he said. “I’m sure some of the doctors I know have had to recommend home help for patients. There’s probably an agency that deals in this.”
“I wouldn’t want it to be someone different all the time. I think Dad would feel better with someone regular, who he could trust.”
“I know what you mean,” Steven said. “Just leave it to me.”
After ten more minutes, Steven had to get back to his patients, and she needed to get home in case her dad arrived home early. Truman and Peggy had driven him out to Llano to eat barbecue.
“Don’t forget to ask Emily,” she said as they parted.
“I won’t,” Steven promised. “But don’t expect her to come, Grace. She’d probably feel like the odd man out at our family gathering.”
Grace knew something about feeling like she didn’t quite belong at a family shindig. She also understood the longing to be there anyway. “Just ask her.”
 
That evening, as she stood on the back porch, wondering how she would ever work up the nerve to broach the subject of live-in home help with her dad, she caught sight of Ray dashing around his backyard. He was so tall that she could see the top of his head from her vantage point on the porch. Ray was hauling the ladder toward the pecan tree in the center of the backyard. Closer up, he looked a little demented.
“Are you going to pick pecans?” she asked. A lot of them were still wearing their green husks.
He halted in midmovement and darted glances all around, trying to pinpoint where the voice had come from. He spotted her and exhaled in relief. Maybe he’d thought he was hearing voices.
“I’ve been neglecting the bird feeders!” he said. “I haven’t even thought about them.”
She noticed there was one hanging from a large branch on the pecan tree. It was fairly high up.
“You’d better let me spot you on that ladder,” she said.
“I’ll be all right.”
“Famous last words.” She hopped down and came around the side of his yard and let herself in. On the other side of the fence, Iago was showing his discontent at being left behind by attempting to claw through the wood.
“I never once thought about the bird feeders till this morning,” Ray said. “Can you believe that? All these months—who knows what the birds have been living on.”
“Well, it was summer. Now is the time when you should be tending to them, I think.”
“Really?” He looked somewhat relieved as he crawled up the rungs and unhooked the house-shaped glass-and-wood structure. He climbed back down holding the bird feeder away from him with his fingertips.
“I assume birds survive okay in the warm weather just eating worms and whatnot,” she said.
“I hope so,” he answered, scoping out where the other feeders were. Now that Grace had an eye out, she spotted several. Ray headed for a hummingbird feeder hanging off the back porch. “Jen would have been able to say for sure. There wasn’t a bird that came into this yard without her noticing it. She knew them all, and what they ate, and where they wintered.”
“She was a bird-watcher?”
“A bird freak,” he corrected. “She set up this backyard as a sort of private, open aviary.” His gaze snagged on a birdbath full of leaves, pecan shells, and what looked like the petrified remains of an old baseball. He shook his head. “But now look at it. I wonder how long it took the birds to realize they needed to decamp.”
“They’ll come back,” she said.
He furrowed his brow at her. “Do you know anything about birds?”
She laughed. “Zilch, actually.” Then she nodded at a bird feeder hanging off a linden tree by a window. “You missed one.”
He obediently moved the ladder. “I wonder how often I should be checking these things.”
“You could put Lily on it,” she said.
He swung his head around. “Lily?”
She nodded. “She lives to observe. She’s over at our house right now.”
“I know.” She squinted at him and he explained, “They leave me notes. I don’t know how to thank you for being so patient, letting them invade your home all the time.”
“No thanks necessary. Dad loves having them over. I do too.” She felt a pang about Ray, though, abandoned by his loved ones, rattling around the house all by himself, angsting about bird feeders. “I think they’re about to start watching The Lord of the Rings. Have you seen it?”
He laughed. “Asking a software engineer if he’s seen The Lord of the Rings is like asking him if he reads Dilbert or has ever tried Indian food. Jen and I had seen it twice by the end of opening weekend.”
She watched him unhook the feeder that looked like a little red barn. “Jennifer was an engineer?” She hadn’t known that. “Is that how you two finally got together? Work?”
He climbed down. “It was earlier, actually—in college.”
“You went to the same college?”
“We weren’t supposed to. I went to Stanford, but then in my second year, my dad had a stroke and had to stop working, so I transferred to UT and lived at home to save money.”
“That couldn’t have been easy.”
“No, it wasn’t. Most of my friends from high school had left, and I was living at home, so I didn’t really feel part of college life at first. Then one day as I was walking to my electromagnetics class, there was Jen in the hallway. I nearly walked right by her, until I heard her say my name. She was on her way to chemistry. We were taking some of the same courses, but in different sections. Later on we met in the student union and caught up. Her parents had moved to Little Salty, so I had lost contact with her for a while. She asked me if I was dating anyone—I thought this was my big chance—and then she told me she wanted to set me up with her roommate. Cheryl. So I went out with her roommate for a while.”
Grace felt as if someone had slapped her. He had gone out with someone else? “Why?”
“Because Jen already had a boyfriend.”
But Jennifer was your true love, she wanted to say. He was supposed to be a hopelessly devoted, tortured Olivia Newton-John man. Why would he have settled for Cheryl?
“It was sort of devious,” he admitted. “I didn’t like the guy Jen was going out with—he was a really slick business school guy. I thought if I kept an eye on him, I’d find out he was cheating on her. Sure enough, he was. After a while, it was really obvious. He was being incredibly edgy around the apartment, and sometimes he even looked guilty. And one time on campus I saw him making out with a girl—I couldn’t see her, but I suspected it was not Jen.
“Afterward, I invited Jen out for a pizza—at Milto’s—and she seemed distracted and upset. It was clear she knew. I was about to tell her what I knew, just to confirm her suspicions, when she suddenly blurted out, ‘That bitch!’ Really loud—right in the middle of the restaurant. Then she apologized for ever having introduced me to her.”
“Who?” I asked.
“Cheryl,” Ray explained. “It was Cheryl who Jen’s boyfriend was cheating with. Cheryl! I couldn’t believe it. He wanted Cheryl when he already had Jennifer. And at the same time, Jen said something like, ‘I can’t believe she’d rather go out with him than you!’
“Well, that stopped both of us. We sort of gaped at each other for what seemed like a minute or so, and then I said, ‘But you preferred him, too.’ And she said no, she didn’t, and I said she obviously had because she had been going out with him and not me for five months, and she said that was because I had never asked her. And I explained that I hadn’t asked her because I assumed she’d turn me down flat, and she said that was the stupidest thing she’d ever heard of, and I argued that it was actually perfectly logical since we’d known each other forever and had never dated. Then she repeated that if I had asked her that might not have been the case, and I replied that we’d never know now because it was all in the past, and she said it wouldn’t be all in the past if I would just finally for once ask her out on a damn date. And then it struck me—she really did want me to ask. So I did.”
Grace felt like a kid listening to a fairy tale. Never mind that she knew the ending, her attention was rapt. She just needed to hear the words. “And what did she say?”
“She looked at me like I was the biggest jerk in the world and practically yelled, ‘What the hell took you so long!’ ” He grinned. “And that’s how we finally got together.”
And they all lived happily ever after.
For a while.
The sadness of his loss hit her full force.
“You two must have gotten married pretty soon after college,” she said.
“The month after we graduated. Jen didn’t want to wait to have a family. She was an only child and had always dreamed of having a big family, but at the same time, she wanted them all out of her hair by the time she was forty-five, when she would still be young enough to try skydiving or take trips to the Amazon without worrying about anything happening . . .”
As his words hung in the air, Grace’s smile faded, and she looked down.
Ray busied himself with birdseed. “Thanks for helping me,” he said. “I can manage on my own now.”
She didn’t want to go—though he clearly expected her to. Without thinking, she blurted out, “Would you like to come to Thanksgiving dinner with us?” At his look of surprise, she continued, “Dad wants to have all his friends and family over, and I’m sure he’s going to want to invite Dominic and Lily.”
“Thanks, but my in-laws mentioned coming down.”
“Oh. Well that’ll be even better, for the kids. And probably for you, too.” His expression seemed so serious, she worried she had embarrassed him. Or maybe he thought that she was being pushy, or God forbid, coming on to him. “I just thought I’d make sure you weren’t alone for the holiday. We’ll have lots of people coming over. My boyfriend is coming from Portland.”
“Your boyfriend?” He seemed startled, as if he didn’t expect that she would have one.
She nodded. “His name’s Ben. We live together.” He laughed, and she felt her cheeks burn. “Is that so hard to believe?”
“Well, it’s hard to believe you’re actually living together when you’re here and he’s two thousand miles away.”
“True, but it’s only temporary. In fact, I’m probably going back with Ben after Thanksgiving. My being here was never supposed to be permanent.”
“I couldn’t imagine being away for so long from someone I love.” He turned back to his tree. “Not voluntarily.”
The implied criticism in his words hit her with a glancing sting. She felt like defending herself, but that was foolish. She didn’t have to explain herself to this neighbor who didn’t know the first thing about her.
Not knowing what else to say, she settled on “Well, I’m sure the birds will be back soon.”
“What?” His head snapped up as if he had already forgotten she was there. “Oh, sure. Thank you for your help.”
She wandered back to her side of the fence and was greeted by an ecstatic Iago. For the rest of the evening, and for much of the next few days, she felt a bitter regret for not clearing up the idea that she was somehow a bad person because she had abandoned Ben. Because she hadn’t abandoned him, really. She had just extended her stay. And why should she feel compelled to justify her actions to Ray? She didn’t care what he thought.
Besides, it wasn’t as if he was the king of interpersonal relationships himself.