10
WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
Lou knew where he was, what day it was, and who was in the White House. Dr. Allen, his GP, chuckled through most of the interview, especially when Lou grumbled that his children had forced him to come.
“Kids ganging up on you, Lou?” The doctor winked at Grace, who was perched uncomfortably in a chair in the corner. She hadn’t wanted to come into the examination room, but her father had insisted, as if to prove to her how wrong she and Steven were.
Dr. Allen elbowed his patient. “Well, you should know—‘How sharper than a serpent’s tooth it is. . . .’ ”
Her father kept his eyes trained on the doctor’s face. “I’m sorry?”
Grace dug her nails into her palms to keep from blurting out the rest. Was he kidding? Her dad knew King Lear like she knew Seinfeld.
Dr. Allen’s brow furrowed a moment before he chuckled again and asked Lou to count backward from one hundred by sevens. “I have a colleague you should meet,” he said, already reaching for a pad to start scribbling the name as Lou faltered at eighty-six. “A neurologist—big brain like you, Lou. Jacob Franks wrote the textbook they teach at Johns Hopkins. I’m just a horse doctor next to this guy.”
Grace jumped to her feet, eager to get out of there. Dr. Allen wasn’t joking about being a horse doctor—he obviously didn’t know what he was talking about. Even though she had made the appointment to see him and practically dragged her father here, she felt like giving the quack a piece of her mind. A lot of people couldn’t do math in their head, and forgetting one little quote wasn’t proof positive of anything, either. Her father was always reading and learning new things. He played chess, for Pete’s sake.
Besides, he was seventy-six. Didn’t everybody start to lose a few gray cells at that age?
Why had she instigated all this?
As they walked out to the car, Lou was still clutching the piece of paper in his fist. “Can I borrow your cell phone? I want to call this number.”
Two days later, at the neurologist’s, Lou hobbled after the nurse by himself, while Grace stayed in the waiting room. The lighting was soft and Audubon prints of wild turkeys and woodpeckers decorated the deep forest-green walls. Several ficus plants stood in corners and served as screens between clusters of armchairs. Grace took a seat near the glassed-in receptionist area. Magazines fanned across an oak table next to her, and a pamphlet display hung on the wall above it.
Each pamphlet title she read seemed grimmer than the last: What Is a Migraine? . . . Living with Epilepsy . . . After You’ve Had a Stroke . . . When the Diagnosis is Alzheimer’s . . .
Her gaze rested on the last. Alzheimer’s. That word had been skittering around her mind for days, unacknowledged and unspoken.
She reached over to grab the pamphlet but recoiled before her hand actually touched it. What was the point in looking? The diagnosis wasn’t Alzheimer’s. There wasn’t any diagnosis yet. And she wasn’t a doctor. Steven had suggested the changes in Lou might be chalked up to a malfunctioning thyroid. Dr. Allen had run a blood test and they had yet to hear back on the results. No sense panicking prematurely.
Still, the furrow in Dr. Allen’s brow when Lou had failed to finish the quote from King Lear would not be banished from her mind.
She snatched the Alzheimer’s pamphlet out of its slot and inspected it. The cover was a collage of old people of all races and both sexes, usually hugging another old person or a child, or being hugged by someone else. It appalled her that her father—dignified, sharp-witted, sardonic—should be associated with anything this insipid. She flipped it open in irritation. Alzheimer’s disease is a disease of the brain that impairs thinking and memory. It may also change behavior. It is not part of the normal process of aging.
Who on the planet didn’t know that already?
She slapped the pamphlet shut again and tapped it against her palm. The trouble with these things was that they were written for idiots. They were pointless.
She wondered if there was a section about symptoms and opened it again, just to check.
Memory loss.
Well, duh.
The second on the list was Difficulty performing simple tasks. But her father managed very well on his own. Except for the accident.
People with Alzheimer’s disease are apt to forget common words.
That wasn’t Lou, either.
She frowned. Dog biscuit. That was a word he had forgotten the other day. She hadn’t thought anything of it at the time.
But that was just the trouble. Why would she? All of these symptoms were problems everyone had. By these criteria, she suffered from Alzheimer’s. If it wasn’t for the words thingamajig and whatsit, there would be days when she couldn’t communicate with anyone.
She put the pamphlet in her purse and decided to check messages on her phone. Her inbox contained the usual mix of spam and messages from family and friends in Oregon. Her mom wanted to know whether she would be staying in Austin until August, in which case she would miss Jake’s birthday party. (The last birthday party of Jake’s that Grace had been to was his eighth.) She said she didn’t envy Grace having to live through the heat, or with the Olivers. Grace wondered if the thought of her in Austin was causing her mom to have flashbacks. Something seemed to be ginning up the long-distance maternal concern.
There was no message from Ben; Grace hadn’t heard from him since he’d called to let her know the water heater had been changed. One message came from Sam. Sick of chess yet? the subject line read. What followed was a typical communiqué from her brother, giving her his news and speculating about how things were going at home. The tone reminded her that she hadn’t bothered to update him about their father’s health concerns.
She started to text a reply, but then stopped. There was really nothing to tell him at this point that wouldn’t fall into the category of alarming him prematurely—perhaps unnecessarily—or leaving him in the dark.
The door to the inner office opened and her father came hobbling back out with a folded piece of pink paper protruding from his breast pocket.
“What did he say?” Grace asked as she held the building’s door for him on the way out.
“I’m going to have an MRI.”
“When?”
“They’ll call me with the appointment. The doctor said there’s a chance that I might have had a small stroke. Or maybe some kind of head trauma.”
She slowed as they reached the car. “But if you’d hit your head, wouldn’t you remember?”
“Not if hitting it caused me not to remember.”
She frowned, trying to decide if that made sense or not.
On the drive home, she asked, “What did he do?”
“Who?”
“The doctor.”
Within the confines of his shoulder belt, her father shrugged. “Tests.”
“What kind of tests?”
“Just tests, Grace. Reflexes. Questions.”
“What kind of questions?”
“What does it matter? It was me in there, not you,” he said sharply. “I don’t give you the third degree every time you come out of a doctor’s office, do I?”
At the change in his tone, heat leapt to her cheeks. “No, of course not. I’m sorry.”
The drive through the next blocks was so tense Grace fiddled with the air conditioner just to block out the rigid emptiness. A blizzard of cold air streamed from the vents.
“When this is all over,” Lou said, “I want you to go home.”
Grace glanced over at him sitting straight and still in his seat, his hand resting on his cane. “When what’s all over?” she asked.
“The tests. Whatever happens, I don’t want you staying here any longer than necessary. I’m not helpless.”
“You’ll still need me, Dad. You’ve got a broken leg. You can’t drive.”
“You’ve got a life in Portland, and the store to tend to.”
“Ben’s handling it for now.”
“That’s why I’m concerned,” he said.
“I worry about you, Dad. Sam’s thousands of miles away and Steven’s life is crumbling and . . .” She almost mentioned something about Peggy evidently not being someone he could count on—she still hadn’t been over to the house once—but she stopped herself. “Who can you depend on?”
“I’ll manage,” he said. “Life’s not a children’s game, Grace. I don’t get to count to ten before the action starts. Ready or not, here it comes. I’ll figure out a way. I’ll adjust.”
“But—”
She was about to argue, but when she opened her mouth, she realized she had no words. And as she pulled into the driveway, she noticed Dominic sitting on the steps of Lou’s front porch, next to Iago. Both of them got up when she’d parked, and Dominic crossed to open Lou’s door.
“Where’ve y’all been?” he asked.
“Out and about,” Lou said as he began the process of extracting himself from the front seat.
“I walked Iago,” Dominic said, “but you said you were going to teach me chess.”
“I did, didn’t I?” Lou laughed. “Well, there’s no time like the present.”
Without a look back, he and Dominic made their way to the house, slightly impeded by Iago, who, with the whole yard to walk in, still managed to be underfoot.