Although excuses for speeding are more numerous than pocket protectors at a slide-rule competition, this excuse just didn’t add up. When an officer clocked a woman driving in excess of twenty miles per hour over the speed limit, he pulled her over.
He leaned into the driver’s side window and observed the female driver of the car clutching painfully at her jaw. She mumbled to the officer. “I’b just cum from da dntest an wud goink homb ta git ma med-cine.”
After about ten minutes of painfully slow translation, the officer finally deduced that the woman was speeding because she needed pain medication after a long session with her dentist. For some reason, the officer just wasn’t buying her story.
“Maybe I better run a check on your license,” the officer said, setting his bait. “I seem to remember a woman with this name who was wanted in an armed robbery.”
The woman’s eyes grew huge and indignant, and her mouth flew open. “Why, I have never been so insulted in all my life. How dare you accuse me of being a common—”
Then her hand flew to her mouth as she realized she had spoken very quickly and very articulately . . . and that the officer was not likely to overlook her very rapid emergence from the effects of the Novocain.
She was right.
The officer gave her a “tibket”!